Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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E-cigarette That Looks Like Life Support Device

The user wears what looks like an oxygen mask while wheeling around a hospitaly looking electronic appliance hanging on an IV stand.
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Smoking looks cool. Damn cool. This would impress young minds at a subconcious level to counter more appealing depictions of smokers.

It would be something for a sort of anti smoking mascot to use. They'd go to nightclubs, concerts etc wheeling around this nicotine delivery system designed to look like a hospital life support system. The delivery system would beep occasionally and have lights and numbers.

To complete the look, the user would wear a hospital gown with no butt coverage and cheap foam slippers. He could wear some smarmy sign like "Smoking looks cool".

I actually think e-cigarettes are a great idea and can't stand people who tell other people what to do so I don't know why I'm posting this idea. Just to make sure I can still type I guess.

doctorremulac3, Sep 17 2013

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       Since many locations have now included e-cigarettes in their "No smoking" policy, a portable oxygen mask and cylinder would be the ideal disguise for such a device ...
8th of 7, Sep 17 2013
  

       It seems like an asthma inhaler would be a more convenient disguise for an e-cigarette, but I suppose it would look suspicious if it is being used every few seconds.
scad mientist, Sep 17 2013
  

       I like Pen Jillet's anti smoking message:   

       "Remember kids, don't smoke... unless you want to look REALLLY cool!"   

       Personally I couldn't care less if / when/ where or why people smoke. I miss the little ashtrays on airplanes. They've been replaced by "service" dogs. I'm far more likely to trip over a service dog exiting a sinking airplane than a cigarette butt.   

       "Outta my way granny! This plane's sinkin' fast!"
doctorremulac3, Sep 17 2013
  

       BIGSLEEP FOR PRESIDENT   

       VOTE BIGLSEEP   

       In any case, why don't they just start a campaign to make smokers more lighthearted? According to my pack, it's smoking seriously that damages your health.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 17 2013
  

       What [MB] said'   

       // Can we not just ban something sensible like being completely stupid in public places, //   

       Because that would be the end of tourism from the U.S., a notable foreign currency earner for many nations.   

       // or in places where complete stupidity is even more common like the government //   

       Anarchy. Great.   

       // or the workplace. //   

       The end of Management as we know it ...   

       // We could also tax stupidity heavily. //   

       This is known to exist, but sadly is not yet commonplace.   

       // After all smokers have taken the greater share of the burden of paying tax and doing the thinking over the years. //   

       Au contraire ... if they were truly "doing the thinking" they wouldn't be paying the tax ...
8th of 7, Sep 17 2013
  

       You're right there, [8th]. If those of us who enjoy the beautiful weed ever got together and did the thinking properly, we'd realize that the government is on pretty shaky ground when it declares that it will charge you a huge amount of money to do what you like with the leaf of a particular type of plant.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 17 2013
  

       // Can we not just ban something sensible like being completely stupid in public places, //   

       //Because that would be the end of tourism from the U.S//   

       Is that my cue to say something like "Hey man, a couple of million American "tourists" armed with P51s and Sherman tanks are the only reason jackboots aren't goose stepping through Leicester Square as we speak... yadda yadda yadda." ?   

       I'll pass.
doctorremulac3, Sep 17 2013
  

       Actually, we all have about thirty million vodka-swilling Russians with PPsHes to thank for that. And there were only a few hundred thousand American servicemen in the UK, not two million. It only seemed like that many because we are, as a people, generally loud and overpresent in any social setting.
Alterother, Sep 18 2013
  

       Interesting how U.S. combat deaths in Europe were 183,588 yet only a "few hundred thousand" passed through England on their way to hold the Russian's coats while they did all the real fighting.   

       Did they all get killed? I seem to remember hearing about one or two making it back ok.   

       And forgive me if I don't praise Stalin for his role in liberating Europe from tyranny.   

       //we are, as a people, generally loud and overpresent in any social setting.//   

       Mmm, yea ok. I'll give you that one.
doctorremulac3, Sep 18 2013
  

       If you must acknowledge it, at least try to do it a tone of voice quieter than a bellow.   

       // "Hey man, a couple of million American "tourists" armed with P51s and Sherman tanks are the only reason jackboots aren't goose stepping through Leicester Square as we speak. //   

       Any prospect of a successful invasion of Britain had pretty much vanished by December 1940 solely by the efforts of the natives, coincidentally a whole year before the US was caught with its oversize garish Hawaiian shorts down by the Filthy Nips and was forced to desist from coat-holding and wade in, rather than just counting the money and singing "Happy Days Are Here Again".
8th of 7, Sep 18 2013
  

       Your comment that our Hawaiian shorts were somehow "oversized" is specious. You've implied that short pants bearing a Pacific islands flora motif should be sorter and fitted to the curves of the wearer. This would not allow the freedom of movement we need to do things like surfing, running on the beach, having fun and counting money. I understand this might differ from the skin-tight socialist government issue burlap underwear you're fond of, but form follows function and Hawaiian shorts do the job they were meant to do nicely.   

       And I like Nips, Filthy though they may be, but then again I like the English too so there's no accounting for taste.
doctorremulac3, Sep 18 2013
  

       You Rock [doc]. If you notice us loud and stupid Americans don't say such nasty insults nor retort back to generalized accusations of stupidity or people's penchant for fashions.
xandram, Sep 18 2013
  

       Only because you have no choice, since your innate capacity for wit, repartee, rhetoric and irony is slightly less than that of a stunned hummingbird …   

       And no, it is an offence against all that's civilised to sell flowery shorts in those sizes. It's bad and wrong. Big shorts, yes, by all means, but at least in some plain neutral colour like khaki or olive drab.
8th of 7, Sep 18 2013
  

       // tax stupidity //   

       If by stupid you mean uneducated, then I totally disagree. After all, knowledge is wealth and people should be taxed accordingly.
mitxela, Sep 18 2013
  

       The irreconcilable paradox of a Cleverness Tax is that the majority of clever people can act stupid and avoid it, whereas stupid people are ipso facto too stupid to avoid a stupidity tax by being clever …
8th of 7, Sep 18 2013
  

       Wow, heavy man.
doctorremulac3, Sep 19 2013
  

       e cigarettes have obviously hooked a neighbor of mine. He thinks they are safe and harmless. So sad.   

       Now if they make e Booze, that will be something.
popbottle, Jun 13 2016
  

       // "Hey man, a couple of million American "tourists" armed with P51s and Sherman tanks are the only reason jackboots aren't goose stepping through Leicester Square as we speak. //   

       Any prospect of a successful invasion of Britain had pretty much vanished by December 1940 solely by the efforts of the natives, coincidentally a whole year before the US was caught with its oversize garish Hawaiian shorts down by the Filthy Nips and was forced to desist from coat-holding and wade in, rather than just counting the money and singing "Happy Days Are Here Again". — 8th of 7, Sep 17 2013   

       Your comment that our Hawaiian shorts were somehow "oversized" is specious. You've implied that short pants bearing a Pacific islands flora motif should be sorter and fitted to the curves of the wearer. This would not allow the freedom of movement we need to do things like surfing, running on the beach, having fun and counting money. I understand this might differ from the skin-tight socialist government issue burlap underwear you're fond of, but form follows function and Hawaiian shorts do the job they were meant to do nicely.   

       And I like Nips, Filthy though they may be, but then again I like the English too so there's no accounting for taste. — doctorremulac3, Sep 18 2013//   

       My God, could this be the finest sparring match ever in the on again / off again battle of American vs Englishman? I was laughing out loud at both sides.
doctorremulac3, Jun 13 2016
  

       No. The finest was the War of 1812, the one where your white house got bunt down ... remember that ? You got a right drubbing, from, gods help you, the Canucks. That's got to sting ...
8th of 7, Jun 13 2016
  

       //solely by the efforts of the natives//   

       ... including natives of Australia, Barbados, Belgium, Czechoslovakia, France, Ireland, Jamaica, New Zealand, Poland and South Africa.
pertinax, Jun 13 2016
  

       //solely by the efforts of the natives//   

       ... including natives of Australia, Barbados, Belgium, Czechoslovakia, France, Ireland, Jamaica, New Zealand, Poland and South Africa.
pertinax, Jun 13 2016
  

       //No. The finest was the War of 1812, the one where your white house got bunt down ... remember that ? You got a right drubbing, from, gods help you, the Canucks. That's got to sting ..//   

       Scene: The Moon, 1969. (157 years after 1812)   

       Neal Armstrong: "Hey Buzz, you ever feel bad about the War of 1812?"   

       Buzz Aldrin: "Wow, the Earth looks magnificent from here doesn't it? What was that about 1812?"   

       Neil: "You know, the War of 1812. Do you ever lay awake at night and think. "Wow, I'm truly ashamed to be an American. In 1812, years after kicking the crap of the English, they tried messing with us again and although we kicked the crap out of them and their allies yet another time, they did manage to burn some buildings down."   

       Buzz: "Mmmm. No, can't say I've given it a lot of thought. Been pretty busy since then. Why, is that something that's bugging you?"   

       Neil: "No, of course not. This conversation never took place obviously. We're characters in an absurd parody talking about the war of 1812 while walking on the Moon."   

       Buzz: "Oh, that's nice. Hey, there's a lovely piece of plagioclase feldspar! Think I'll take it home and give it to my wife."   

       Aaaand scene! Thank you. ;)
doctorremulac3, Jun 13 2016
  

       Optional additional joke:   

       "Hey, there's a lovely piece of plagioclase feldspar! Think I'll take it home and give it to my wife.   

       After that maybe I'll give her this rock."   

       Thank you.
doctorremulac3, Jun 13 2016
  

       //War of 1812// That was more of an extended pub crawl : you visited us, we visited you to collect on the bar tab... 20 quid is 20 quid.   

       But, by the time we got there you'd turned the lights off and scarpered. The fire was an accident: McKilroy had an empty bottle in one hand and a lit torch in the other, went to toss the bottle at the door you weren't answering and... well, McKilroy wasn't ever the brightest pitchfork in the shed, even sober.   

       Be fair though, it's not like you were using it for anything important...
FlyingToaster, Jun 13 2016
  

       Still aren't ...
8th of 7, Jun 13 2016
  

       In agreement on that one.
doctorremulac3, Jun 13 2016
  
      
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