Ear Wigs

"Fashions change", said the old, grey-haired gentleman.

I had seen him before. He was often on the same 8:14 bus that I took to work.

"Time was", he went on, "everyone wore sensible hats with broad brims and your ears were protected from the ravages of the sun, wind and rain."

"Nowadays, baseball caps reign supreme. Everyone wears 'em, with their jug handles stickin' out."

"Sunburn, biting cold, windburn, skin cancer... ears never had it so rough"

I murmured sympathetically, glancing up at him. There, nestled beneath the brim of his fedora, were two matching tufts of the same steel grey hair that adorned his pate.

"Ok, so he's got hairy ears", I thought.

Then I looked again. Sure enough, he had three hairpieces on. Carefully made, to be sure, but he was wearing three wigs, including the two on his ears.

Idly, I wondered if there was a way to market them to the world. Maybe there was a buck to be made here? Who would model them for me? Prince Charles, perhaps?

[By the way, this idea came from my son, who is 4. I was trying to explain to him what earwigs are. He exclaimed, "I thought you meant that you wear wigs on your ears!" He then observed, "Your ears wouldn't have been sunburned yesterday, at golf, if you had wigs on them, Dad."
Kids' logic is sometimes astonishingly insightful.]