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Emergency Autorotating Escape Hat

Positively Ludicrous, Inspired by Nature
  (+3)
(+3)
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against]

"I have you now, Mr Bond!"

In this climatic scene it appears as if all hope is lost. There is nowhere to go on this abandoned skyscraper rooftop except over the edge. But fear not, for this morning Mr Bond donned his Emergency Autorotating Escape Hat!

Tightly coiled around this helmet are a pair of large propellers which spring out as he pulls the string. As the machine gun fire ricochets off the surroundings, he leaps into the air -- and the unpowered propellers start to autorotate.

His descent is no doubt reminiscent of the flight of a sycamore seed (although there are bearings at the joint of the helmet, otherwise it would just be ridiculous). The employment of autorotation ensures that the entire apparatus might possibly weigh less than a conventional parachute.

mitxela, Feb 15 2014

Doodle http://mitxela.com/...helihat/HeliHat.png
[mitxela, Feb 15 2014]

Fire escape "parachute" https://www.google.com/patents/US5826678
[mitxela, Feb 15 2014]

Descending parachute device http://www.google.co.uk/patents/US2836383
Prior Art [8th of 7, Feb 15 2014]

Autorotation http://en.m.wikiped...g/wiki/Autorotation
Nasty, dangerous things, helicopters. [8th of 7, Feb 15 2014]

The Rotachute http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rotachute
Not hat mounted... [scad mientist, Feb 17 2014]

[link]






       Three points.   

       First: it needs two counter-rotating blades, otherwise Mr. Bond is going to spin faster and faster as he falls, almost matching the autorotation speed of the blades given enough time. He will look stupid staggering and falling over after he's landed.   

       Second: a sycamore-leaf-style escape device has already been patented. Gallingly, I cannot find a link.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 15 2014
  

       We doubt if even James Bond's cervical vertebrae and musculature are sufficient to resist the combination of rotational torque and vertical extensive loading that this device would apply.   

       More suitable for Linda Blair ...
8th of 7, Feb 15 2014
  

       Nonsense, if the bearings are up to scratch there should be minimal torque transmitted. And as illustrated in the diagram, the correct riding position is to hold on to the chinstraps so as to minimise the risk of head dislocation.   

       In my search for patents I did churn up a number of parachute-hat-derivatives, my favourite being how somebody patented the use of an umbrella as a parachute [link]. In comparison, my invention seems almost sensible.
mitxela, Feb 15 2014
  

       what 21 said.
FlyingToaster, Feb 15 2014
  

       //hold on to the chinstraps //   

       But Mr Bond will need both hands free to shoot back at the bad guys, shirley ?   

       Contra-rotating blades would neutralise torque, but add to complexity.   

       <link>
8th of 7, Feb 15 2014
  

       Aye, that illustration does show the ability to descend whilst holding a rifle. I see the benefit.   

       To [21], [toaster], I advise you investigate the difference between a helicopter and an autogyro.
mitxela, Feb 15 2014
  

       // drop an unpowered helicopter out of a C-5 Galaxy //   

       It would certainly be kind of tough for the maintainers to hinge out and secure the rotor blades during the descent.   

       Apart from that, it seems an excellent way of dealing with helicopters, and we would cheerfully pay a dollar a time to watch this.   

       Autorotation relies on the helicopter having (a) a fully spun up rotor disc, (b) low or nil vertical speed, and (c) the tricky one - sufficient of the flight control systems still operable.
8th of 7, Feb 15 2014
  

       But it takes a lot more effort to spin the blades of a helicopter. Even in autorotation, there's friction from the swashplate and transmission (also maybe the hydraulic pump for the flight controls?). I've seen an ultralight autogyro being given an initial spin by hand.
mitxela, Feb 15 2014
  

       I'm a bit concerned that the chinstrap would deny Mr. Bond the opportunity for a snappy comeback as he deftly escaped the clutches of death one more time...   

       Perhaps the hat should be threaded instead. Granted, this may have a rather deleterious effect on his scalp, but he would be able to speak the lines he has so masterfully honed over the years, taunting [Bad Guy X] as he lifts off.   

       As an added safeguard, two hooks could descend from the hat and into his ears for additional stability and resistance against torque.   

       I highly approve of this idea and therefore award it a bun [+].
Grogster, Feb 16 2014
  

       I'm surprised no else has mentioned the Rotachute yet (see link). I'm not sure of the details for launching it, but I assume they prerotated the rotor before dropping it.   

       For an "emergency use only" hat mounted device, it seems like some small rocket engines mounted in the rotor tips might be about right to get the rotor moving.   

       Also, the Roton Rotary Rocket planned to use autorotating blades for slowing the descent. Can someone point out the halfbakery idea that inspired that attempt?
scad mientist, Feb 17 2014
  

       (waiting for [MaxB]'s third point)
hippo, Feb 17 2014
  
      
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