Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Good Night Granny Service

Sing me to sleep.... for a fee
 
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For the lonely singles out there who have a hard time sleeping at night, call the Good Night Granny. A pleasant-looking old lady reminiscent of your grandmother shows up at your door with a glass of warm milk and sits in a rocking chair by your bedside, singing gently 'til you fall asleep.

The granny charges by the 1/2 hour, and this is a strictly hands-off service. Although non-narcotic, this service does have some risk of dependency. Consult a psychiatrist to see if Good Night Granny is right for you.

21 Quest, Aug 31 2007

Doré's Ogre - it's perfectly shocking ! http://upload.wikim...s/f/fa/Poucet10.jpg
Just as all are sound asleep, granny reveals her true nature and purpose [xenzag, Aug 31 2007]

Comin for to carry me home http://www.halfbake...a/carrymehome_2ecom
[monk's] reminder [phundug, Sep 07 2007]

[link]






       Sweet.
  

       //sits in a rocking chair by your bedside, singing gently 'til you fall asleep.//..and when you wake up in the morning everything is missing except for a half empty upright glass of milk on the floor..
skinflaps, Aug 31 2007
  

       ....and if your grandmother was of the oger variety ? Every sweet tale requires a good ogre. (+)
xenzag, Aug 31 2007
  

       Not a problem. Just dose the grannies up with loads of Pro Plus.
jtp, Aug 31 2007
  

       One of my Grammas made us stay up real late at night to watch female wrestling with her...
xandram, Aug 31 2007
  

       I agree with [skinflaps]. How am I going to go to sleep if I think Granny wants to rob me blind?
Shadow Phoenix, Aug 31 2007
  

       The same way parents go out to dinner or the movies while leaving their child/ren home with a babysitter. Hidden cameras.
21 Quest, Aug 31 2007
  

       Maybe make the cameras plainly visible...?
21 Quest, Sep 01 2007
  

       Who remembers "carrymehome.com"? This reminds me of that. I don't know if this is just a personal quirk, but I could never go to sleep with someone else in the room unless it were my real grandmother, who is dead. But I shan't taint your winning streak. Neutral.
monk, Sep 01 2007
  

       Mighty decent of you, monk. Thanks!
21 Quest, Sep 01 2007
  

       I wouldn't sleep in a room with my dead Grandmother in it.
  

       Neutral.
theleopard, Sep 07 2007
  

       [Anathema], is it not a bit creepy being sung to sleep by ol' Agnes Nutter?
theleopard, Sep 07 2007
  

       This went a full week without a single bone. What changed?
21 Quest, Sep 07 2007
  

       it was me, [21 Q]. i don't want some old lady singing me to sleep in her shaky voice. generic grandmas are like generic lovers: rarely any good.
k_sra, Sep 07 2007
  

       I thought it would just be a bit creepy. Still, whatever floats your boat [+/-]
theleopard, Sep 07 2007
  

       Fair enough. To each his/her own.
21 Quest, Sep 07 2007
  

       I've noticed. I was just wondering where it came from, I hold no enmity for those who bone my ideas because they don't think it's a good idea. The only ones I dislike are those who bone just for the fun of it or out of dislike for the poster, with no regard to the idea itself, and those who refuse to admit they did it when asked. I have no problems with k_sra whatsoever.
21 Quest, Sep 07 2007
  

       I remember how when I was little and I was taking a nap, my grandmother would peek into the room to see how I was doing. It actually scared the crap out of me but I didn't tell her.
phundug, Sep 08 2007
  

       The autoboner strikes again! Wasn't me, though (+)
Shadow Phoenix, Oct 07 2007
  

       Nah, I think that one of the folks who annoed this, there were a few good points made against it. 'preciate the bun, though!
  

       Yeah, the baker who boned this explained why. No worries!
21 Quest, Oct 07 2007
  

       Perhaps a recording of one's grandmother singing a lullaby would suffice.
  

       Then again, neither of mine have the time or the inclination to do anything silly like that.
Spacecoyote, Oct 07 2007
  

       Nor do mine. The idea is to capture the essence of the mythical bedtime story granny. That is who the actors are representing.
21 Quest, Oct 07 2007
  
      
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