Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'

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Halfbaker's Limerick Challenge
Step right up and test your skills...
  (+11, -1)(+11, -1)
(+11, -1)
  [vote for,
against]


The name of the game: a community limerick challenge. Each person submits one line to a developing limerick, and in doing so, tries to stump the author of the next line by the increasing difficulty in creating a meaningful rhyme that sticks to the topic as it's generated.

The rules: No using words that are noted for having no rhymes whatsoever, like 'orange.' The limerick must make some sort of sense when read through, surreal though it may be.

A bungling young baker 'named 'Steele...


RayfordSteele, Aug 09 2002

A similar game I played once http://www.banksean...velytale/image.html
It started out as an email game: she wrote the first verse, a limmerick where each line began with the letter A. The next turn was mine, and I wrote a limmerick where each line began with B. We alternated like this all the way to Z in a thread of email echanges over the course of a month. Later she suprised me with a bound and illustrated version of it. [banksean, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 21 2004]

[link]






       had many an idea surreal..

yamahito, Aug 09 2002
  

       so he went to the store...

BinaryCookies, Aug 09 2002
  

       and sampled a S'More...

thumbwax, Aug 09 2002
  

       that was wrapped in a banana peel....

runforrestrun, Aug 09 2002
  

      
A challenging rhymer called Ray...

FarmerJohn, Aug 10 2002
  

       bought all sorts of stuff at Ebay

po, Aug 10 2002
  

       A dozen tamarilloes,

UnaBubba, Aug 10 2002
  

       twelve gross of down pillows,

FarmerJohn, Aug 10 2002
  

       after dozin' under a duvet.

thumbwax, Aug 10 2002
  

       A layabout lazer named 'wax,

UnaBubba, Aug 10 2002
  

       Received a most interesting fax,

runforrestrun, Aug 10 2002
  

       after reporting in sick to woik

po, Aug 10 2002
  

       <Autocorrection>Excuse me, Sir, Mr. John 3:16, Sir, "smirk" does not rhyme with "woik" - The word which you rhymed to is a forbidden word, Mr. Sinner. Please make a mental note of it and rhyme with "woik", the less disgusting, more palata/digesti/ble term. <Factoid to be ignored in this limerick>I haven't called in sick to woik in oh, about 10 years or more.</Factoid to be ignored in this limerick></Autocorrection>

thumbwax, Aug 10 2002
  

       [following from po]...woik,
he spent the whole day playing quoits,

sappho, Aug 10 2002
  

       then made tracks to his bed to relax.

FarmerJohn, Aug 10 2002
  

       somethin' 'bout reindeer and St. Nick,

FarmerJohn, Aug 10 2002
  

       but their plans went awry

po, Aug 10 2002
  

       by this quick reply:

yamahito, Aug 10 2002
  

       By the foolish limerick spy.

kaz, Aug 10 2002
  

       A young Farmer from Sweden

po, Aug 10 2002
  

       Couldn't figure which field to put the seed in,

runforrestrun, Aug 10 2002
  

       "Here I sit on the fence,"

FarmerJohn, Aug 10 2002
  

       Geeze...is everyone asleep?   

       A young Farmer who hails from Sweden,
Couldn't figure which field to put the seed in,
"Here I site on the fence",
"With my bags full of quince",
"Trying to create my own little Garden of Eden"
  

       somebody start a new one....I'm just feeling impatient today.....sorry....

runforrestrun, Aug 10 2002
  

       From chain saw and axe, forrest ran,

FarmerJohn, Aug 10 2002
  

       The return of a 'baker named lewisgirl,
Threw the bakers' community into a whirl,
We all thought she had gone,
And vowed not to return,
What are you trying to do to us, girl?

UnaBubba, Aug 10 2002
  

       From chainsaw and axe, forrest ran,
Pursued by a silver woodsman tin can,
a strawman and lion that wailed,
and the young Dorothy Gale,
He grabbed Toto and headed back to Kan

Susen, Aug 10 2002
  

       We've all missed the presence of Susen
Who spent 6 months in Belize, just cruisin'
Sifting sand on a beach
With a cocktail in reach
But now she's back of her free will and choosin'

UnaBubba, Aug 10 2002
  

       Bored and tired of boozin'
Like Turtles of Galapagos we return
To lie on our bellies on the beach at risk for sunburn
And on the halfbakery hunt for old ideas to churn
Until we are forced by fish to learn
Maybe it should use GPS, and not be piezoelectric
Despite the well-intentioned woik ethic
With the possible exception of a remote control
And the telephone with which I put you on hold
  

       [Note: yes, that is well more than one line.]

polartomato, Aug 11 2002
  

       an odd concept, a polartomato

po, Aug 11 2002
  

       and a halfbaking tubbie po

polartomato, Aug 11 2002
  

       looks like the tele is frozen

thumbwax, Aug 11 2002
  

       perhaps a depletion of ozone

po, Aug 11 2002
  

       or a french-fried Irish potato.

FarmerJohn, Aug 11 2002
  

       I guess we will never know

UnaBubba, Aug 11 2002
  

       (Is that a six line limerick?, anyway:)

There was a young man named Eanis...

namaste, Aug 11 2002
  

       who swore at the judge from the dock

po, Aug 11 2002
  

       When told to put away his penis,
He relied,"Your worship, it's really a cock."

UnaBubba, Aug 11 2002
  

      
Unabubba blew bubbles down under,

FarmerJohn, Aug 11 2002
  

       Until it caused him to chunder;

yamahito, Aug 11 2002
  

       So each bubble was filled,

FarmerJohn, Aug 11 2002
  

       With shrimp Bar-B'd not grilled,

Susen, Aug 11 2002
  

       And his dinner was drifting asunder.

-alx, Aug 11 2002
  

       .....an unassuming halfbaker called alx

po, Aug 11 2002
  

       said "pronouncing my name is most complex",

Susen, Aug 11 2002
  

       As with any good tale,

UnaBubba, Aug 11 2002
  

       You can read it in Braille.

FarmerJohn, Aug 11 2002
  

       a wonderful friend called blissmiss

po, Aug 11 2002
  

       when greeted by a spider does dismiss,

Susen, Aug 11 2002
  

       sends her down the corridor fleeing

yamahito, Aug 11 2002
  

       'till persuaded by Spiderman's kiss.

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       Dropped in a bucket
Somewhere in Nantuckett...

polartomato, Aug 12 2002
  

       A ladybug
And a sea slug...

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       I'm going to duck it.

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

      
Where have all the 'bakers gone?

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       <xml>long time parsing...</xml>

SteveAdams, Aug 12 2002
  

       Where have all the 'bakers gone?

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       Are they with beauxeault?

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       <fantasy world> Young girls have picked them everyone </fantasy world>

DrBob, Aug 12 2002
  

       When will they ever learn?

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       When will they ever learn?
</Peter, Paul and Mary>

angel, Aug 12 2002
  

       A Doctor named Bob was invited to Lords'

po, Aug 12 2002
  

       In short breeches and wigs they stood there in hordes,

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       Not sure what to do,

runforrestrun, Aug 12 2002
  

       He bared his tattoo,

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       it wigged them out of their gourds.

thumbwax, Aug 12 2002
  

       In exchange for a glimpse of her gourds.

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

      
The yama I know, ain't the god,

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       and he's certainly not Ken Dodd

po, Aug 12 2002
  

       but he's good on a fiddle,

FarmerJohn, Aug 12 2002
  

       and quick with a riddle,

Susen, Aug 12 2002
  

       And a very clever, big sod.

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       Farmer, there's one thing I'd like to know,

Susen, Aug 12 2002
  

       Is that posing pouch purely for show?

-alx, Aug 12 2002
  

       A tanned, Adonical god,

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       Or a harmless great clod,

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       Or 6 foot of beefcake, to go.

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       (just couldn't resist, could you UB? ;-)

Susen, Aug 12 2002
  

       While eating a custard pie one day,

Susen, Aug 12 2002
  

       I chanced on a 'baker named Ray,

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       (Just trying to guess what might have been in your evil, little mind, Susen<g>)

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       I said, "Have some pie"   

       (I was gonna ask what kind of Farmer he was ;-)

Susen, Aug 12 2002
  

       He said, "I'd rather die."   

       (Sure you were. And the green cheese would be...?)

UnaBubba, Aug 12 2002
  

       Thinking how much more he would weigh.

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

      
An unlazy Susen on the beach,

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       There once was a man named Percy

amazing, Aug 13 2002
  

       (amazing, deletion your anno above this....you, sir, are out of order, your honour)

Susen, Aug 13 2002
  

       Seemed unaware of the lessons she could teach,

UnaBubba, Aug 13 2002
  

       With examples from dogs,

PeterSilly, Aug 13 2002
  

       Lizards, newts, bats and frogs,

angel, Aug 13 2002
  

       And a litre of powerful bleach

SteveAdams, Aug 13 2002
  

      
There's an angel here without wings,

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       who says many wonderful things

yamahito, Aug 13 2002
  

       prog-rocking throughout Cornwall,

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       And still finds time for you dingalings.

UnaBubba, Aug 13 2002
  

       who *claimed* he was only thirteen, by golly;

yamahito, Aug 13 2002
  

       But the power of his rhetoric,

angel, Aug 13 2002
  

       and understanding of metric,

sappho, Aug 13 2002
  

       Left even oldies feeling quite jolly.

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

      
And our jutta the capo dei capi,

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       Gives the boot to trolls that are crappy

Mr Burns, Aug 13 2002
  

       Because they can't learn to follow the herd..

Mr Burns, Aug 13 2002
  

       And leaves them soiling their nappy.   

       PS. [bliss] - I think you'll find that's "ne'er".

PeterSilly, Aug 13 2002
  

       A pedantic soul named [PeterSilly],

-alx, Aug 13 2002
  

       With a mug just like [PeterSealy],

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       A plentitude of toilet ideas to berate

polartomato, Aug 13 2002
  

       And says his real name's Silly, really.

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       head throbbed, felt sck

po, Aug 13 2002
  

       Who put in an IV

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       That did the trck dbl quck.

FarmerJohn, Aug 13 2002
  

       There once were some Ponytail Fasteners......   

       hair furniture we had in Xcess

po, Aug 13 2002
  

       Our peace she did transgress,

Susen, Aug 13 2002
  

       This limerick's quite a mess

FarmerJohn, Aug 14 2002
  

       No different from anything else on this site, but I digress...

polartomato, Aug 14 2002
  

       I once saw an idea called Pole Pants

UnaBubba, Aug 14 2002
  

       That multiplied like invading fire ants

FarmerJohn, Aug 14 2002
  

       The point was not clear,

PeterSilly, Aug 14 2002
  

       Sod this; I need a beer.

angel, Aug 14 2002
  

       then I'll hem my divan's new valance.

sappho, Aug 14 2002
  

       Some people like cats and some hate 'em,

sild, Aug 14 2002
  

       That 8th uses glue to restrain 'em,

st3f, Aug 14 2002
  

       Then 7/8 lights the fuse,

thumbwax, Aug 14 2002
  

       And kitty sings the blues,

Susen, Aug 14 2002
  

       They fell on his plate and he ate 'em.

FarmerJohn, Aug 14 2002
  

       There was a young goddess called Mictlantecihuatl,

Aristotle, Aug 14 2002
  

       who had a strange thing for young cattle,

PeterSilly, Aug 14 2002
  

       She'd lift up her skirt,

UnaBubba, Aug 14 2002
  

       And with her butt flirt,

FarmerJohn, Aug 14 2002
  

       A handsome philosopher called Aristotle

po, Aug 14 2002
  

       Blew a tire when his car hit a pothole

Mr Burns, Aug 14 2002
  

       So with the aid of some custard,

Aristotle, Aug 14 2002
  

       He remained totally unflustered

po, Aug 14 2002
  

       And drove on philosophically in full throttle.

FarmerJohn, Aug 14 2002
  

       Who logged in when he got bored

madradish, Aug 14 2002
  

       He'd post a real ripper,

UnaBubba, Aug 14 2002
  

       Who ever thought he'd be Gored?

UnaBubba, Aug 14 2002
  

       from arthritis his joints were rustin'

mihali, Aug 14 2002
  

       But he was sooooo cute,

Susen, Aug 14 2002
  

       Was all that didn't start bustin'.

watermelancholy, Aug 14 2002
  

       The return of a 'baker named waugs,

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       Means we can stop checking morgues

madradish, Aug 15 2002
  

       He's *very* well read,

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       And can't be misled,   

       (UB you are *evil*)

madradish, Aug 15 2002
  

      


(Yeah, I know)

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       While the rest of us have gone to the dogs.

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       Dawgs?

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       You say "dawgs" and I say "daugs". You say "hawgs" and I say "haugs".

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       Hunh?

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       Farmer = Attila, of the soil.

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       Bubba = the grey matter Antipodean.

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       who gets a cup o' tea in, [is anyone still playing?]

General Washington, Aug 15 2002
  

       Found water.

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       Then thought, "Er..."

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       Shouldn't oughta

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       & have a sense of foreboding

po, Aug 15 2002
  

       it's great to see susen is back

mihali, Aug 15 2002
  

       She is back on the beaten track

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       but off the beaten path

thumbwax, Aug 15 2002
  

       just as sweet and game for a laugh

po, Aug 15 2002
  

       It seems the bakery has a ghost,

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       who leaves a trace in many a post:

yamahito, Aug 15 2002
  

       Of information the rest of us lack

UnaBubba, Aug 15 2002
  

       Can it be a spooky hack attack?

FarmerJohn, Aug 15 2002
  

       Halfbakery folk are a diverse lot,
Aussie, Brit, Canadian, Scot,
From Belizian beaches,
To Connecticut reaches,
Our doughy, half done, melting pot.

Susen, Aug 15 2002
  

       There once was a man named Percy, Who really liked to eat...sherty, He would peel off the skin, Then sing "Rin-Tin-Tin", And that is the story of Percy.

amazing, Aug 15 2002
  

       Full Moon, he walked the ramparts.

po, Aug 16 2002
  

       His belly full with lamb hearts,

FarmerJohn, Aug 16 2002
  

       He felt all alone,

FarmerJohn, Aug 17 2002
  

       so he picked up a stone

mihali, Aug 17 2002
  

       And threw it, at the village's tarts.

UnaBubba, Aug 17 2002
  

       some idiot troll called our phoenix, a muppet

po, Aug 17 2002
  

       Claimed the poster-child for dysgenics, a puppet

thumbwax, Aug 17 2002
  

       They could have picked me,

UnaBubba, Aug 18 2002
  

       but they knew better, you see

mihali, Aug 18 2002
  

       for they'd've had a reply they'd never forget

yamahito, Aug 18 2002
  

       Replete with 3 word contractions, yet.
And some dude with a pair of giant pistols,

bristolz, Aug 19 2002
  

       Into the fray, tired and a-lagged by jet,
Weighs the 'baker we all know as Bristolz.

UnaBubba, Aug 19 2002
  

       You got that one right O Aussie mister,

bristolz, Aug 19 2002
  

       How have you been, our bristolzish friend?
Did you see that great land from end to end?

UnaBubba, Aug 19 2002
  

       End-to-end, I fear I did not
But of the south, I saw a lot.

bristolz, Aug 19 2002
  

       Then tell us, if you can... of Matabeleland.

UnaBubba, Aug 19 2002
  

       I wish she would come out to play.

DrBob, Feb 13 2003
  
      
[annotate]
  


 
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