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Hokey Cokey Recursion Death March

  (+7, -3)
(+7, -3)
  [vote for,
against]

You put your left leg in
Your left leg out
In, out, in, out
you shake it all about
You do the (
You put your left leg in
Your left leg out
In, out, in, out
you shake it all about
You do the (
You put your left leg in
Your left leg out
In, out, in, out
you shake it all about
You do the (
You put your left leg in
Your left leg out
In, out, in, out
you shake it all about
You do the (
You put your left leg in
Your left leg out
In, out, in, out
you shake it all about
You do the (
You put your left leg in
Your left leg out
In, out, in, out
you shake it all about
You do the (
...)))

and so on and so forth until you return to pick up your toddler from nursery and find them sweatslick and stick-thin, unable to communicate other than with pleading, glassy looks, your horror at the alarmingly still bodies littering the floor like Lego offset somewhat by relief that your own bairn has more fight in him.

calum, Apr 12 2010

Hoken Coken http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hokey_Cokey
[calum, Apr 12 2010]

Wikipedia: The Song That Never Ends http://en.wikipedia...ong_That_Never_Ends
Infinitely recursive children's song. [rcarty, Apr 12 2010]

James Finlayson http://en.wikipedia...iki/Jimmy_Finlayson
D'oh! [DrBob, Apr 13 2010]

Do you wonder about the meaning of it all? http://existentialcrisis.net/
[DrBob, Apr 14 2010]

Londo Mollari analyses the Hokey Cokey http://www.youtube....watch?v=-xwhqum4ZXw
"I swear to you, it doesn't mean a thing!" [DrBob, Apr 14 2010]

Forth http://en.wikipedia...ogramming_language)
Useful ... [8th of 7, Apr 14 2010]

[link]






       Abominable. (+)
Jinbish, Apr 12 2010
  

       Can you still cheat at this by adjusting your stack size in advance?
pertinax, Apr 12 2010
  

       The concern I have with this version of the song, is that nobody will ever find out what it's all about.
zen_tom, Apr 12 2010
  

       It's a life lesson.
calum, Apr 12 2010
  

       Yo, I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I'll tell you what I want, what I really really want,
So tell me what you want, what you really really want,
I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna, I wanna really
Really really wanna [bang] (put them out of our misery)
Ian Tindale, Apr 12 2010
  

       Spice Girl, interrupted.
zen_tom, Apr 12 2010
  

       zigazig ah
rcarty, Apr 12 2010
  

       //nobody will ever find out what it's all about.// I shouldn't post an anno just to praise someone else's, but: that was truly inspired.
mouseposture, Apr 12 2010
  

       I shouldn't post an anno II: just to praise someone else's anno they shouldn't have posted :II
Mustardface, Apr 13 2010
  

       Isn't this going to lead to children with massively over-developed right legs and thus, inevitably, to a severe shortage of decent left-sided midfielders and so condemn the rest of the UK to suffering another 10 years of listening to the English moaning about how Ryan Giggs isn't really Welsh?
DrBob, Apr 13 2010
  

       I crashed my toddler. Now he's asleep.   

       [+]
wagster, Apr 13 2010
  

       [DrBob] Yes, unless you demand that all recursive songs should come in chiral pairs, so, in this case, there would be an equal number of people putting their right foot in as their left foot.
hippo, Apr 13 2010
  

       Or, each onion-skin layer of the cake is alternatively left or right-worded, using the words left or right, respectively, all the way down until you reach infinity.
Ian Tindale, Apr 13 2010
  

       //there would be an equal number of people putting their right foot in as their left foot.//

[Nods in agreement then does huge double-take of James Finlayson proportions]
There's something just not quite right about that sentence hippo.

[Thinks about it some more - probably far too much]

Apart from the slightly awkward grammar, there is an interesting logical issue. If you think about it, you could end up with some people putting both feet in, whilst others would put no feet in which would lead to classroom dissent, chaos and anarchy whilst still satisfying the 'equality' requirement. I'm not sure whether this is a good thing or not but it is definitely a thing.
DrBob, Apr 13 2010
  

       [Ian] yes, unless infinity is an odd number, in which case it'd still be unbalanced.
[DrBob] You're right - in order to comply with disability legislation (DDA, 2005) the song should allow some people to put no feet in.
hippo, Apr 13 2010
  

       Yes, someone really should update all the old nursery rhymes to bring them within the boundaries of current social norms, legislation and levels of inoffensiveness. As if girls are afraid of spiders these days...
wagster, Apr 13 2010
  

       You (the "Hokey Cokeyer"), are entitled but not bound, at the time the song the Hokey Cokey (the "Song") mandates (the "Relevant Time"), to do each of the following:
(i) put the body part of your choice in; then
(ii) put the body part of your chouce out; then
(iii) repeat actions (i) and (ii) above, in order, twice; then
(iv) shake the body part of your choice all about; then
(v) repeat steps (i) to (v) inclusive
provided that the body part chosen in respect of the first implementation step (i) is used, to the exclusion of all other body parts, in respect of all iterations of steps (i) to (v) inclusive.
  

       In the event that the Hokey Cokeyer elects not to carry out steps (i) to (v), the Hokey Cokeyer shall be required to sit nice until the earlier of Hometime (as defined in the terms and conditions relating to the provision of nursery services) or intervention by a member of the emergency services.
calum, Apr 13 2010
  

       diabolical
Voice, Apr 13 2010
  

       Is this really what it's all about?
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 13 2010
  

       (Wonders why this fine idea hasn't been ripped a new one by the mfds?  Is Jutta on Spring Break?  Where are the attack dogs?  Did they test for flaws in the idea and never come out of the recursion?  Are they discouraged that Halfbakery has gone into anarchy?)  OH MY GOD!  THE HOKEY COKEY RECURSION DEATH MARCH!
Mustardface, Apr 14 2010
  

       Yeah, no, it is a life lesson, though one that is consciously apparent only to the survivors some time after they start the downward slide into their useless decrepitude (i.e. 30 years old): you repeat the same acts over and over for the first "half" of your adult life, imagining that when you reach the apex of your four score and ten, the repetition will, Miyagi-like, reveal itself to be, in fact, an ancient technique of induction into the mysteries of life and you will, simply by continuing the downward half of the dance, become enlightened and happier, achieving total consciousness just as you pass the final rah-rah-rah and slide into death. This is the lie that the HCRDM reveals, that there is no apex, there is no earned free-wheel downhilling towards the last closed bracket of recursion, just a continual repetition of largely meaningless activities, with and to no end, no enlightenment.
calum, Apr 14 2010
  

       Fuck.
wagster, Apr 14 2010
  

       linky or two.
DrBob, Apr 14 2010
  

       Would be easier to implement in Forth.   

       <link>
8th of 7, Apr 14 2010
  

       It's hard to think sbout thst whilst Hokey Cokeying. Very nicely writ, calum.
Mustardface, Apr 15 2010
  
      
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