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Liza, The GPS Chick

Give your car the personality it already has
  (+16, -3)(+16, -3)
(+16, -3)
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Many of us talk to our cars. With the advent of navigation systems, many cars now talk back.

Unfortunately, they drone on. Int his age of ringtones, ringbacks and MP3s, we should be able to replace the vocabulary these systems use to liven the conversation, so instead of "Rerouting", for instance, it can say "Hon, you missed that turn, but don't worry, you can take the next one in 2 miles".

theircompetitor, Aug 08 2005

[Dub's] link...er, linked. http://www.tomtom.com/
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Aug 09 2005]

Mole Grips(tm)(r) http://www.fine-too...duct_Code=PP-GM6LNA
Pointy-nosed knacker-breakers [Dub, Aug 09 2005]

Turn left, fool http://www.cnn.com/...1/22/celebrity_nav/
Mr. T's navigation system [theircompetitor, Dec 28 2005]

Navtones, company actually doing it http://www.navtones.com/
[theircompetitor, Dec 28 2005]

Yoda Navigation http://www.technews...m-gps-systems-0856/
[theircompetitor, Jul 18 2010]

Dynastic Dashboard Display Dynastic_20Dashboard_20Display
Similar(ish) concept but less helpful. [DrBob, Jul 21 2010]

Satnav with local accent http://www.itpropor...mmands-coming-soon/
Go rind the rindabite... [Wrongfellow, Nov 29 2010]

Directions in your own voice https://techcrunch....339efa895f7134defc/
[theircompetitor, Jun 17 2017]

[link]






       "Oh my god you're hopeless. I told you you should have taken that right turn an hour ago. Why can't you ever stop and ask someone?"
moomintroll, Aug 08 2005
  

       *Gag *Hwack! *Cough. "Midgrade fuel?! WHERE is your mind?? If you're that tired of me, just give me over or send me away!"
reensure, Aug 08 2005
  

       bug report analysis: <screaching sounds> "WATCH OUT FOR THAT TR..." <crashing sounds>   

       Indicator latency is still too high.
zigness, Aug 08 2005
  

       How about a computer that can auto-shout insults at other drivers for you, with customizable phrases?
Size_Mick, Aug 08 2005
  

       I can see this going either of two ways, maybe both. First, the company publishes a comprehensive list of the situations it needs phrases for, so people can design personalities and publish them.   

       Second, there could be an interactive training session where the system prompts you with a stock phrase, and you tell it what you want it to say instead. This could be an amusing way to spend a long trip.
dhill, Aug 08 2005
  

       How 'bout an attachment on the driver's headrest to slap him/her uspide the head when a wrong turn is made. "I said LEFT, you son of a motherless goat!" *whap*
Machiavelli, Aug 08 2005
  

       I'm not sure, but I think TomTom do this already. http://www.tomtom.com/
Dub, Aug 09 2005
  

       There should be a mother-in-law character that tells you you're going the wrong way whichever way you go.
Dub, Aug 09 2005
  

       There should be a mother-in-law character that tells you you're going the wrong way whichever way you go.
Dub, Aug 09 2005
  

       //I'm not sure, but I think TomTom do this already//TomTom slaps you about the head?
coprocephalous, Aug 09 2005
  

       [Dub] Please turn your radio down when you're talking in the HB - some nasty feedback echo there.
ConsulFlaminicus, Aug 09 2005
  

       Why John Cleese, of all people?
pooduck, Aug 09 2005
  

       yeah.....john cleese.....not exactly the voice i would want to hear in my car......you could have it tell you to do other things aswell like do your seatbelt.....coz we all know how easy it is to forget THAT one!!!!
chocolateraindrops, Aug 09 2005
  

       [ConsulFlaminicus] it's just that they always say things twice.   

       Say things twice.   

       One I know said the following: Slow down, or you'll get a headache.....   

       Slow DOWN or you'll get a HEADACHE....   

       SLOW DOWN.... OR YOU WILL GET A HEADACHE!   

       [She later had to go into hospital to cure a jaw problem she'd developed... My bro reckoned that she should have some Chrome Vanadium jaws fitted... Like those on Mole grips(r)(tm) (see link above) ... Oh, and the Terminator]
Dub, Aug 09 2005
  

       Apparently baked now, see Mr. T link
theircompetitor, Dec 28 2005
  

       +
po, Dec 28 2005
  

       I'd like one that had a sort of contra dialogue so, for example, the GPS tells you to turn left, you turn left and then this ethereal, secondary voice (like the woman in airplane) mutters "I wonder why Jim turned left? He never turns left at home!".
DrBob, Jul 21 2010
  

       I thought someone-else might have commented here by now...
Dub, Nov 29 2010
  

       Coincidentally, as I came in to this idea just now O thought of location dependent sat-nav voices - Or local accents, which [Wrongfellow] just linked to...
Jinbish, Nov 29 2010
  

       Eliza indeed -- could the software keep up in London? :)
theircompetitor, Nov 30 2010
  

       Dang, I was gonna suggest something like this. +
Kansan101, Dec 17 2012
  

       "My previous owner is better than you"
piluso, Dec 17 2012
  

       <Hal>   

       "I'm sorry, Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that ..."   

       </Hal>
8th of 7, Jun 17 2017
  
      
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