h a l f b a k e r y
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Hollywood is having a creativity problem. Their movies
have such big budgets they need to hedge their bets by
simply re-doing successful movies that have already been
done. They're called "franchises" or "reboots" but I think
they should be called "shit".
So here's the idea, though I wouldn't
be surprised if they
already do this.
Categorize all movies by points that can be digitized.
Protagonist, character arc, plot points, third act twists
etc. such than you can mix the movies together with a
So you'd just click "Moby Dick" and "Dirty Harry" and you'd
get a story about a rogue river patrol cop who plays by
own rules hunting down a whale that's been swimming up
his river and wrecking stuff. The whale might be trained
smuggle drugs or something and he gets really mad and
This plot grinder would be the perfect match to the
random action movie name generator. Let's pick a name
our Dirty Harry / Moby Dick mashup.
"Quadruple Conquest"... no,
"Soldier of Extremism", hmm. Closer I guess.
"War For Punishment". Don't mind that one.
"Triple Revenge". Eh.
"Double Risk", that's interesting.
LOL, "Duke of Retreat", that's just wrong. Spin
"Sudden Execution." Ooo, I like that.
Ok, last try. Aaaaand we have a winner! The story about
rogue river cop and a crazy drug smuggling whale is
Point is, Hollywood could save a lot of time just having
computers churn out this shit.
Movie name generator.
Also has a great political rhetoric, financial advice, academic quote and wine review generator, [doctorremulac3, Oct 16 2017]
You can make a Moby Hill, or Fanny Dick. [mylodon, Oct 17 2017]
||//So you'd just click "Moby Dick" and "Dirty Harry" and you'd get a story about a rogue river patrol cop who plays by his own rules hunting down a whale that's been swimming up his river and wrecking stuff. The whale might be trained to smuggle drugs or something and he gets really mad and sinks ships. //
||I think you've identified the problem right there, [doc].
||... or you could just watch films made in not-Hollywood, where the
actors are a lot cheaper so there's some budget left over for the
||... that is a theory I have not seen born out. Cheap local movies made on the fly are often, and predominantly, bad.
||Do AI actors dream of exposing their directors casting
||No, they dream of electric sheep, shirley ... ?
||you always have to make it dirtier
||//... or you could just watch films made in
not-Hollywood, where the actors are a lot cheaper
so there's some budget left over for the script//
||I've seen a couple of Film Festival movies.
||I realized there's a ranking in Hollywood as to
||1- Studio owners.
2- Film producers but only when they're making
3- Actors, see #2.
10- Film viewers.
||Not sure what 4 thorugh 9 are but we aren't there.
||On second thought, I've had some of my music of in
a couple of
Hollywood movies, I might be a 9.9999, although
my name is always listed at the very end of the
credits after Key Grip and Best Boy whatever that
is. Knowing Hollywood I'm guessing you might not
want to be a Best Boy. Unless you're into that sort
||I remember sitting in the theater with my
girlfriend once waiting for the credits to scroll up
showing my name and the lights had come on and
the theater emptied before it finally rolled by. By
that time we're the only ones in the cinema
looking kind of foolish sitting there. I don't think
the "That's right baby, I'm a star!" message came
off too well.
||A friend of mine just suggested Fins Up as the title of my
Dirty Harry / Moby Dick movie.
||// my Dirty Harry / Moby Dick movie //
||Just be glad they didn't suggest "Dirty ..." - no, on second thoughts, forget it.
||He also proposed "Something Fishy In Tuna Town"
I suggested that might have already been used in
||Ok, well... it's probably time to stop talking. Some
conversations need an eject button and this is one
||Thanks you folks, good night. Management
apologizes for any inconvenience. Please leave the
building in an orderly fashion and address
complaints to the head office in Omaha.
||I could have sworn I posted an almost identical idea.
||One pet peeve of mine is that people who know about movies say that there are only 8 movies ever made. I have a feeling Hollywood have been equally misinformed.
||Inherent Vice was good, as well as Nice Guys and Mr. Right - some really good movies just fly under the radar because of naff titles.