h a l f b a k e r y
Contrary to popular belief
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I now have learned that todays society has become more jadded and less impressed
with todays brand of rat. I believe this could be detramental to our rat population
swilling in the cities. I have taken time to watch some rats running through the streets
and somehow something appears to have changed
in their stride. In years gone by,
rats seemed to have some value to the common working man. the rat would be
respected for living on as the man tried to keep him down, thrived in a workplace
environment where most would give up and look for new opportunity. But today the
real rats don't posses that kind of glory. I believe we need to replace todays common
rats with a new breed of genetically altered super rat beast that will give the rats their
lost respect and admiration. Maybe a combination of bovine growth hormone and
McDonalds special sauce, (to be named at a later date, and usda approved). The rats
may be a little larger, a little meaner, but darn it, they deserve their place in the sun
along with the venerable cockroach and ph
||I think this is a great idea, but do we have an excess of clothing to fit these rats? It would be damned shame if all the childrens clothes ended up on the rats and we had a shortage of clothing for our children. Just a thought.. We would need to plan ahead for something like this.
||I believe we could cloth the rats in body suits made out of a combination of lycra and
sewn pig skin
||Oh no! Oh no! A blackmarket will develop for the Special Sauce Bovine Growth Hormone, which will work only to a minor degree on humans, but imagine the potential if they can get the still-lingering bitter aftertaste out of the formula that even the Special Sauce can't disguise...
||Maybe the rat has changed, but only as much as the common man has changed. Like all commensurals, the rat & the city human are locked in evolutionary sync. I'm all for giving rats dignity if some might rub off on their hosts, but I'm not optimistic.