Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Clearly this is a metaphor for something.

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Nailshroom

Flail away!
 
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Professional nail hammerers never bend a nail - their kungfu like strikes always hit square, and rarely do they need more than 2. This is contrast to the (infrequent) do it yourselfer, who bangs away at the nail, marring the wood, bending the nail, grazing the thumb, and otherwise causing mayhem and misery.

Enter the nailshroom. This is a dumbell shaped device, with the "cap" of the top and bottom mushrooms flat. In the center of the far cap is a hole which fits down around the nail. The device is then placed flat against the wood. This flat cap of the nailshroom is cushioned with rubber. On the near side, a small metal cylinder protrudes from the center flat nailshroom cap. Perhaps a bullseye is drawn around it. On striking this cylinder, it travels down through the shroom, hits the nail, then is springloaded to return back and receive another hit. The nailshroom is held firmly in place with a fist around the middle section.

The nailshroom hits square every time. Even a clean miss with the hammer will just hit the broad flat top of the nailshroom and no damage will be done to project or hand. Glancing blows may send the center cylinder down with less force, but it will still hit the nail squarely. Hide the nailshroom and no-one will know its wasn't done by a pro!

(that last line will be used in the infomercial.)

bungston, Aug 10 2003

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       Sounds like a bad case of nail fungus, but+
wombat, Aug 10 2003
  

       *OW*
thumbwax, Aug 10 2003
  

       It’s called a ‘brad driver’.
Shz, Aug 10 2003
  

       I like this.
The first man I apprenticed under used to say, "always remember, every tool is a hammer except for a screwdriver, because that's a chisel".
  

       I’ve never seen an impact wrench that could sink a nail.
Shz, Aug 11 2003
  

       The first paragraph left me VERY confused, but + all the same.
motive power, Aug 11 2003
  

       Unabubba, if you can't find the correct sized phillips/pozi/torx screwdriver, just use a straight one, though the results aren't so good with torx...
Herbicide, Apr 29 2004
  
      
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