I would like to direct Popeye The Opera.
Our opera would begin in Sweet Haven where Olive Oyl
(played by Angelina Jolie) laments in her ultra-soprano
voice how much she is pining for her Popeye who is away
in Afghanistan fighting a war. (tears out kerchief and
bawls her eyes out to violin
Popeye would appear in Act Two looking stoic and brave
whilst fighting off the enemy. (his part played by "the
Bruto would be played by any number of real life Italian
opera singers who are burly and have bass voices. He
would be the lead villain who keeps Popeye engaged in
dangerous war games.
J. Wellington Wimpy could be played by Bruce Willis or
George Clooney. (fattened up of coarse). He would be
Olive's sweet distraction while Popeye's away.
And some yet to be named precocious child star could play
In the end they all die a tragic yet martyred death in hopes
of saving their country from evil cave dwelling
rebels.(played by evil cave dwelling rebels I guess).
Their bodies bloody broken and beaten lie draped over the
Sweet Haven Flag. Lifelessly. To the sound of a U2 song
played very s_l_o_w_.
Curtain and standing ovations ensue. Bravo bravo...etc.
Children walk out of the theater sad but forever changed
for the better. Loving opera.