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Satellite hunting

Good eating.
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If you visit a place where skies are clear and there are few lights, you can see a satellite moving by just about all the time. Such regions are also those where people can discharge firearms! The Satellite Hunter is a 60 foot tube which attaches onto the barrel of your 30.06 rifle. Within the Hunter is two parallel graphite rails and when charged, these serve as a railgun, further accelerating your bullet to 12 km/second. That's satellite sniping speed!

With your supertelescoping sight, now you can plug away at passing satellites from the safety of your own (electrically wired) mountain shack. Worry not about casualties - the only harm done will be to the global economic machine and all it represents.

bungston, Jan 23 2006

Wired article about satellite hunting http://www.wired.co...hive/14.02/spy.html
Amateur satellite spotters can track everything government spymasters blast into orbit. Except the stealth bird codenamed Misty. [xaviergisz, Feb 01 2006]

Luring missiles with microwaves http://www.globalre...ticles/BOG211A.html
There was a fine first person account of setting these things up, written by a serbian. I had thought it was linked here somewhere but I think that idea has vanished. [bungston, Feb 03 2006]

[link]






       PULL!
Lead time could be a problem.
  

       ya, it will be fun until someone manages a headshot on a space walking astronaut
ixnaum, Jan 23 2006
  

       "Wal, Pa, I done heard thet iffn' ya makte a wish at a fallin' star, it'd come true. But whaffn' ya makte a wish at a risin' one?"   

       "Iffn' yer talkin' 'bout them ones from over 't Rancid's place, ya kin only wish he'd go 't bed 'stead o' keepin' the chickens up all night."
lurch, Jan 23 2006
  

       Weather balloons make excellent targets as well.
Cuit_au_Four, Jan 23 2006
  

       What no special BUNGCO purchase opportunity here [bungston]? Not planning on launching your own BUNGCO "Shooting Star" satellite. How odd!
jonthegeologist, Jan 23 2006
  

       Graphite rails noted [;^)]. Should work much better.
Ling, Jan 23 2006
  

       Of course, you'd return home to find there was no telly.
Dodgy Knees, Jan 23 2006
  

       // 60 foot tube which attaches onto the barrel of your 30.06 rifle//
Have you ever tried to swing an unbalanced 60-foot tube?
[-]
Freefall, Feb 01 2006
  

       So balance it! +
DesertFox, Feb 01 2006
  

       /Have you ever tried to swing an unbalanced 60-foot tube/   

       Yes, as part of my advanced kendo training.
bungston, Feb 01 2006
  

       Well, not sure that I'd like to see satellites randomly selected, and the projectiles that didn't make it up there would come down pretty fast and hard.   

       But I would like to own one, so [+}
normzone, Feb 02 2006
  

       [21 Quest] , you're arguing practicallity (spelling?) on half bakery? You are at the wrong site my friend.   

       Just pokin'.
Night, Feb 02 2006
  

       Play Misty for me.
bristolz, Feb 02 2006
  

       I've been here since I was zero. I've lived all over but Seattle is my home. I have even lived for a short while in Spokane, a place of which I grew quite fond, except for the red-light runners.
bristolz, Feb 02 2006
  

       //except for the red-light runners// People who sprint from strip-joints?
coprocephalous, Feb 02 2006
  

       This sounds like high tech vandalism. Why not stick to throwing garbage cans at mailboxes? Also, consider the danger of the irate DISH network subscribers who might start hunting you when their TV signals go dead.
Cube, Feb 02 2006
  

       Many years ago, a friend jokingly invented "Boeing 747 Hunting", but we never tried it. You see, I had just purchased an over-sized microwave from a garage sale. It was, in a word, scary.   

       Anyway, based on the pre-flight announcements that handheld electronics (up to, and including, GameBoy) should be turned off, we assumed messing with pilots' instrumentation is pretty easy. That said, even from the ground, this beast of a microwave probably tosses off enough stray radiation to render those cockpits nearly useless.   

       So, the game, then, would be to stand on the balcony with the microwave's front door wide open and aimed at the sky. Wait for a plane to pass overhead, and plug 'er in. Perhaps, we could even build some kind of rotating and aimable stand! Or, ya know, just hold it. What could go wrong? The door's opening is faced -away- from us...   

       Tragically, our game would've resulted in several more casualities than yours. Clearly, this is why microwaves do not function unless you close the door. Yes. This, and this alone. ;)
pigonthewing, Feb 02 2006
  

       But then you're IN the plane, silly. The game could never continue past one round! And, where's the fun of aiming? If you're not aiming, you're not hunting. Sheesh! You've taken all the sport out of it. ;)
pigonthewing, Feb 02 2006
  

       The Serbs did exactly that during the Nato bombardment, [pig] - linked.
bungston, Feb 03 2006
  

       // The Serbs did exactly that during the Nato bombardment, [pig] - linked. //   

       Wow. I had no idea. Thanks for the reference. Now I wish I had never gotten rid of that thing. In times of war, I'd hardly think my new microwave could be any help. ;)
pigonthewing, Feb 03 2006
  
      
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