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Slowly Expanding Executive Pen

No sniggering
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One of the ways in which we while away the winter hours in the lab is to place a few pieces of dry ice in a latex glove and then tie it shut. Over the next hour or so, the dry ice sublimes and the glove gradually expands to beach-ball dimensions. Eventually (if it has no pinhole leaks) it makes a satisfying bang.

MaxCo Office Brightening, Inc., is now proud to bring this harmless fun to the boardroom. The MaxCo Slowly Inflating Exective Pen looks like a classy fountain pen, but is actually a black latex balloon stretched over a cylindrical wire frame.

As you go into the meeting, simply unscrew the end of the SIEP and pop in a few pieces of dry ice before placing it nonchalently on the table. As you review the month's sales figures in Powerpoint, your SIEP will slowly expand to become a large pennish marrow, to the bewilderment and consternation of your colleagues.

NOTE: MaxCo Office Brightening, Inc., is a firm with Family Values. We actively discourage the use of double-entendres regarding slowly inflating cylinders.

MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 04 2009

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       I would give the entire presentation in the style of Frankie Howerd.
wagster, Nov 04 2009
  

       Is that a Slowly Inflating Exective Pen in your pocket, or ...?
hippo, Nov 04 2009
  

       Will it go bang ?   

       [+]
8th of 7, Nov 04 2009
  

       "Let me have pens about me that are fat" with apologies to William Shakespeare
xenzag, Nov 04 2009
  

       2b or not 2b - oh sorry, that's pencils.
zen_tom, Nov 04 2009
  

       lots of uses for dry ice in the bored-meeting: slowly raising the table while tilting the chairs back, for instance.
FlyingToaster, Nov 04 2009
  

       dry ice is inconvenient.
WcW, Nov 04 2009
  

       We can use stuff from the poles.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 04 2009
  

       lots of uses for dry ice in the bored-meeting: singing "Total eclipse of the heart" whilst standing on the misty boardroom table
wagster, Nov 04 2009
  

       I think it should have a remote activated plug at the end, so that at a critical moment it can be sent rarting around the room while deflating madly.
pocmloc, Nov 04 2009
  

       Hippo, Wagster, Pocmloc: if you're not going to take this seriously then neither shall I.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 04 2009
  

       // rarting //   

       Sp. ranting (?)
8th of 7, Nov 04 2009
  

       //if you're not going to take this seriously// My annotation was 100% deadly serious; I never jest, least of all on here. Now I feel hurt.   

       [8th of 7], I spelled it as I intended, thankyou very much.
pocmloc, Nov 04 2009
  
      
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