Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Sparky Pants

Pyrotechnic Attention Getters
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Fire retardant pants with an electronic igniter installed on the rear. The igniter is installed just above a zipper slot on the seat of the pants.

The igniter would function just like that of a gas stove. The wearer would have an on and off switch.

On those days when the wearer feels gassy he/she can deploy the discreet zipper and activate the igniter. When gas is released by the Sparky Pants wearer a flaming backfire will be produced.

vfrackis, Jan 03 2011

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       *wunk*
rcarty, Jan 04 2011
  

       Wouldn't it be safer to vent it to a burnoff stack running up along your back to above the top of your head? I'm assuming the wearer doesn't care what people think at this point any way.   

       That way if you still wanted to impress the ladies you could bend over and offer them a light when they pulled a cigarette out. "Allow me" FOOWHOOSH! "Oh, sorry, just roll her around on the ground a little bit."
doctorremulac3, Jan 04 2011
  

       a Burnoff Stack would make an excellent peripheral, sure to amplify potential impact as i am sure it could also be engineered to increase the audible sound of each burnoff event maybe like a trumpet.
vfrackis, Jan 04 2011
  

       You'd certainly get people's attention.   

       I wouldn't wear it to important events though. Graduations, award ceremonies, coronations, that sort of thing.
doctorremulac3, Jan 05 2011
  

       Connected to a portable lie detector AND that childhood taunt of "Liar, liar, pants on fire!" could come true.   

       ( Might need to add a butane cylinder for when the potential liar isn't feeling very gaseous.)
popbottle, Dec 04 2014
  

       [+] for popbottle's anno
4and20, Dec 04 2014
  
      
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