h a l f b a k e r y
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The Startling High Voltage Reindeer Head
Wall Light arrives in several parts. On
opening
the box, one's initial reaction will be to
look for the rest of the antlers, which
appear to be rather stubby, and devoid of
the usual twisting horny features. A
further search of the contents reveals
a
clear mounting plate, pre-drilled with
a number of holes and a set of electrical
contact nodules.
The instructions tell you to fix the
mounting plate to the wall and plug it
into
the mains electric either by tracking the
wall to hide the cable, or by using the
trailing lead, if you are lazy.
You then are advised to attach the
reindeer head to the mounting plate, and
place as many of the contact nodules
into
the holes provided around the plate's
periphery as you want.
You may now stand back and switch on
your new Startling High Voltage Reindeer
Head Wall Light.
On activation a step up transformer
hidden inside the reindeer's head begins
to distribute high voltage power via a
rotating cam to a series of contacts at
the
tips of the stubby antlers.
On reaching these terminal points,
tongues of electricity leap randomly
across the
gaps
and unto the receiving nodules,
completing the circuits, and also visually
completing the antlers.
The resulting blue glow illuminates the
surrounding room.
Nodules can be
repositioned (with the light in the off
position) from time to time to vary
the pattern.
A small tray is provided that sits
discretely
on the floor, below the head, in order to
catch the
grilled remnants of any flies unfortunate
enough to be attracted to the light.
Ozone may also be collected from
the ceiling area, and bottled for future
use.
[link]
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You can also make extremely fuzzy x-ray pictures of the startled audience if you have suitable film (or probably some kind of digital sensor) the other side of the room. |
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Does the reindeer also have a startled expression? |
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I have a Players Please neon sign that
works using this method and it's been
turning for over 50 years without a
problem... very simple, reliable
technology, which also makes a nice
buzzing sound as the sparks arc the
gap
between the cam and the spider of
contacts, distributing the power to each
of
the letters of the sign in turn. |
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Contact points work better at high voltages and low current than vice versa. High currents are what cause burnt contact points. Although to be strictly accurate, it's interrupting high currents flowing through high inductances, which results in both high current and high voltage (hence high power) for a short period. |
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I know at least 20 people who would buy this. |
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//I know at least 20 people who would buy
this.// That should be an HB tagline |
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