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Tomato Dating

Dating agency where everyone dresses as a tomato
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When you go on a blind date, I imagine, it can be hard to identify one's potential date and both people try to make a particular impression on each other in various ways. Also, it can probably be really tense and serious, which might stop people from coming across well.

All of these problems can be solved by the dating agency insisting that everyone dresses as a tomato. It would then be easy for dates to recognise each other, the ice would be broken, the embarrassment would already have reached a pinnacle and it would be downhill from there and there would be no easy way to make a false impression. The potential trauma of being seen in public dressed as a tomato would throw the potential for the relationship into a mild crisis situation which will bring out how people really feel about each other at the start and prevent them from wasting each other's time. The website could just have tomatoes as profile pictures, and it would be harder for people to invade intimate space in quite the same way.

In order to avoid tomato competition, the dating agency itself would supervise the suiting up.

In case you're wondering, yes I really do want to dress up as a tomato but don't let that influence how you feel. I can handle it. I have other interests too.

Alternatively, well you can guess - it's just selecting the isotopes with the shortest half lives in tomatoes to calculate how old they are so you can sort them in terms of probable freshness. Of course the ones highest in radioisotopes would stay fresh for longer anyway.

nineteenthly, Jan 15 2015

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       There are SO many varieties of tomatoes! Plum, Vintage, YellowBoy, Cherry, etc, etc. Maybe there could be some type of graph or correlation as *what* kind of tomato your personality might be represented as...I don't know.
You try it first!
xandram, Jan 15 2015
  

       Well, I was just thinking of yer bog standard round one without going all fancy about it, [xandram], but thanks for the heads-up about the potential problem.
nineteenthly, Jan 15 2015
  

       You spend all that money on the gym membership and herbal testosterone, then you want to dress like a tomato?
bungston, Jan 15 2015
  

       Only if you want to be a beef tomato.
FlyingToaster, Jan 15 2015
  

       It's a great leveller, [bungston], is the idea.
nineteenthly, Jan 15 2015
  

       Tomato... tomahto... let's call the whole thing off!
RayfordSteele, Jan 15 2015
  

       I had that very pronunciation controversy in my mind as I put this together.
nineteenthly, Jan 15 2015
  

       Nervous people could date an actual tomato, saving themselves from the embarearsement of actual human interaction.
pocmloc, Jan 15 2015
  

       It'd be my luck to end up with a lemon suit.
RayfordSteele, Jan 16 2015
  

       Well, at least you might get a squeeze ...   

       This has worrying similarities to "furries" ...
8th of 7, Jan 16 2015
  

       Don'tcha just hate it, when you're dating a vegetable and then find out its a fruit?   

       A saucy idea.
normzone, Jan 16 2015
  

       Yeah it is a bit furry, but that could be circumvented by getting people to fill in questionnaires about their kinks while connected to a machine which measures their sexual arousal somehow, possibly by detecting perineal blood flow.
nineteenthly, Jan 16 2015
  

       What if having their perineal blood flow measured is one of their kinks ?
8th of 7, Jan 16 2015
  

       Well then it will just be positive all the time and they can be a tomato anyway. But the question can be included to see if there's an extra surge.
nineteenthly, Jan 17 2015
  

       "What's tomato with you?"
xenzag, Jan 17 2015
  

       She was a hot tomato. She had cruel shoes. He was a ketchup heir. There were dollar signs in his eyes.   

       This was not going to end well.
popbottle, Jan 18 2015
  

       "If you like to talk to tomatoes... if a squash can make you smile..."
RayfordSteele, Jan 19 2015
  

       I cannot believe you just put that song in my head. Talk about earworms...   

       " And you're tired of blind dating, you'll go the extra mile...
If you'll wear vegetable costumes, hoping you'll meet the one...
Then you should try something different, and you're sure to have fun."
normzone, Jan 19 2015
  

       //What if having their perineal blood flow measured is one of their kinks ?//   

       Are tomatoes annuals or perineals?
MaxwellBuchanan, Jan 19 2015
  

       // annuals or perineals? //   

       Anuals, shirley ? You could verfy it by looking it up … if, that is, you like that sort of thing.
8th of 7, Jan 19 2015
  

       Saucy!
neilp, Jan 20 2015
  

       Saucy!
neilp, Jan 20 2015
  

       Saucy!
neilp, Jan 20 2015
  

       What if you really Lycopersicum but you're afraid to tell her?
UnaBubba, Feb 03 2015
  

       You mean you've been in the nightshade all your life?
normzone, Feb 03 2015
  

       Odd.[+]
Voice, Feb 04 2015
  
      
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