Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Trojan Rabbit

Gatecrashing Lagomorphic Lunacy
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For those who may find some difficulty entering random strangers' parties unannounced and uninvited, there is now invented the Party Invader.

The construction consists of a structural frame which arises from a collapsible trellis, sturdy enough to conceal an interloper or two, built specifically to resemble a jackrabbit. The frame itself will necessarily be lightweight and built upon a gurney. While upraised, the Rabbit would be approximately 6' tall, with attentive ears which have a drawstring by which the ears lower themselves on springed hinges, so that the TR may be drawn forward. The skin of this beast will consist entirely of stitched-together condoms, with a dress jacket (for the Rabbit) tailored from prophylactics (these ones are still in the wrapper) which are taped together. As the Rabbit is collapsible, it can easily be transferred with a vehicle of some sort, or it can be hauled about on foot, without anyone suspecting. When the destination to be gatecrashed is arrived at, the Trojan Rabbit is erected and prepared for party penetration. The TR commanders enter the device and walk/wheel the contraceptive contraption up to the front door. Via a concealed flap in the front of the beast, an arm can be extended to ring the bell, or knock, whichever. If/When the door is opened, a number of strategies can be played according to the situation:

A). Ideal: The partygoers are fascinated and enthralled by this bizarre and unexpected homage to hedonsim. The Rabbit is voted to be drawn in and enshrined. The inhabitants cozened within slyly slide out and partake of the revelry.

B). Not-so-ideal: The revelers are confused. They distrust the Trojan Rabbit, uncertain of what it might portend. This is when the concealed front flap is used to project a hand to silently plead for a tasty (and possibly inebriating) beverage.

C). Obverse-of-ideal: Drunken, violent, rash and premature, an angry mob anathematizes the Rabbit. Ejaculation into the street arises as a possibility. Beware of catapults.

idyll, Mar 25 2003

Prototype, short on rubber. http://www.the-hug....l/pmf40/rabbit.html
An inferior party-penetrator. [idyll, Oct 17 2004]

Trojans http://www.trojancondoms.com/
Maybe they offer a bulk discount for those manufacturing rabbits (?) [Cedar Park, Oct 17 2004]

[link]






       "Silly rabbit, tricks are for kids."
<door slams>
roby, Mar 25 2003
  

       <python>
BEDEVERE: Well, now, uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, uh, wait until nightfall, and then leap out of the rabbit, taking the French, uh, by surprise. Not only by surprise, but totally unarmed!
  

       ARTHUR: Who leaps out?   

       BEDEVERE: U-- u-- uh, Launcelot, Galahad, and I, uh, leap out of the rabbit, uh, and uh...   

       ARTHUR: Ohh.   

       BEDEVERE: Oh. Um, l-- look, i-- i-- if we built this large wooden badger--
</python>
Cedar Park, Mar 25 2003
  

       I thought the French ejected that cunning device a bit hastily. It seemed somehow disappointing and inconsiderate, though I know it wasn't their fault.
idyll, Mar 25 2003
  

       Blame Colonel Angus for that.
roby, Mar 25 2003
  

       Madness. Pure madness. I like it.
st3f, Mar 25 2003
  

       Easter Playboy Bunny
thumbwax, Mar 25 2003
  

       I get it "trojan" rabbit
e-alias, Mar 25 2003
  

       Punny rabbit.
st3f, Mar 25 2003
  

       Boy was that a lousy payoff.
ato_de, Mar 25 2003
  

       argh... memories of the jackelope... "Fast as fast can be, you'll never catch me!"
RayfordSteele, Mar 25 2003
  

       As pickup lines go, the Jackalope's seems doomed to failure.
idyll, Mar 25 2003
  

       // Blame Colonel Angus for that. //   

       I'm a big fan of Colonel Angus.
waugsqueke, Mar 29 2003
  

       Say his name ten times fast, then you'll get it (or not, depending on who's around).
roby, Mar 31 2003
  

       [bliss], I don't mean to assault your tender ears, but Trojan is a brand of prophylactic in North America. [link].
Cedar Park, Apr 01 2003
  

       [ato_de]: It's the payload that matters (in this instance), not the payoff. And who said anything about lice?
idyll, Apr 01 2003
  
      
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