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Tubecaker

What can make tubecakes better, then a Tubecaker?
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To avoid frying on a horizontal surface, and to create tubecakes without stitching, simply use a Tubecaker machine!

Imagine a cylindrical glass cup. Fill it with soft wax. Plunge a toilet paper roll into the soft wax. Remove it.

Now pretend the soft wax is in fact a forged steel heating element. Heated by electricity! The glass is now brushed aluminum, with a logo and a little glowing LED.

Pour crepe batter into the vacuum left by the theoretical toilet paper roll -- turn it on -- and two minutes later you have a tubecake, perfectly cooked, from both sides at once.

The center cylinder has a handle on the top that clips into electrical contacts on the lid of the Tubecaker. When the lid is down, the circuit is completed and the tubecake cookation begins. Lift the lid up, remove the cylinder, and then remove the tubcake.

Fill the perfectly cooked tubecake with ricotta cheese, yoghurt, raisens, sour cherry syrup, lamb, mint sauce, or anything else your heart desires, and serve immediately.

mylodon, Aug 11 2008

Already a tagline http://www.thetick.ws/car5.html
"Not baked goods, professor - Baked bads !" [normzone, Jul 07 2009]

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       What's a tubecake?
lostdog, Aug 11 2008
  

       It's a cake that's been baked in a tube cake tin. There is basically a column in the middle of the cake tin so that the cake mixture has something to cling to (in addition to the perimeter) as it rises. The result is a lighter, taller cake (sometimes called angel cake).
Jinbish, Aug 11 2008
  

       //To avoid frying on a horizontal surface// One must do one's best to avoid this at all times. Specifically when baking.   

       //Heated by electricity!// Such excitement is difficult to cage.   

       It seems as though the idea is to introduce an element to heat the batter from the hollow core. As such it seems novel enough, although something tells me the centre chimney of the original tubecake cake tin allowed hot air through the middle to facilitate another "cooking/heating surface".
4whom, Aug 11 2008
  

       My new hiphop name is M.C. Tubecake. Don't worry, [mylodon], you can hang with my posse. I got your mint sauce brewing.   

       Can't promise both sides at once, though.
bungston, Aug 11 2008
  

       this idea is stunningly poorly presented. Were people commonly using TP tubes for cooking? What is the purpose of the wax? Why does the idea invoke an S&M "how to" tone?
WcW, Aug 11 2008
  

       Seems similar to extrusion cooking sans extrusion. Core-fillers will do all this and filling also.
tatterdemalion, Aug 12 2008
  

       She do the tubecake boogie...   

       [WcW] Yeah, language failed me on this one (I'll keep the blame in that direction). Basically it's a vertical pancake or blintz fryer, circular style. If you had two tubecakes, you could slip them on your forearms like gauntlets, or onto your legs like legwarmers. Add more eggs for more rubbery tubecakes. In this case, you are the meat filling.
mylodon, Aug 12 2008
  

       I almost understood this, up until "...the vacuum left by the theoretical toilet paper roll..."
hippo, Aug 12 2008
  

       This tube cake you speak of... Is it anything like a tube steak?   

       Is it anything like a bunt cake?
ye_river_xiv, Aug 13 2008
  

       You can put tubesteaks, in tubecakes.
mylodon, Aug 13 2008
  

       I keep thinking doughnuts.
po, Aug 13 2008
  

       //the vacuum left by the theoretical toilet paper roll// [marked-for-tagline]
mouseposture, Aug 15 2008
  

       //language failed me on this one//   

       Me, too, when I tried unsuccessfully to come up with a limerick including "halfbaker" and "tubecaker."
bnip, Aug 19 2008
  

       On cold winter mornings, the halfbaker
Would fire up his new tubecaker,
For the lady in bed,
Who'd only raise her head,
For one thing that could always placate her!
mylodon, Aug 19 2008
  

       There was a retired Halfbaker,
who invented, one day, a tubecaker.
When he'd put out the fire,
and changed his attire,
he danced around shouting "Eureka!".
hippo, Aug 19 2008
  

       cool, I was hoping for some responses like those.
bnip, Aug 19 2008
  

       <Henry Mancini, Sinatra/Hepburn/Williams, etc.>
"Tube caker, wider than a mile
I'm cooking you in style someday
You dream baker, you heartbreaker..."
hippo, Aug 19 2008
  

       Delighted as I am by the implied need for toilet paper roll-shaped baked goods, I don't think this would work - unless some modifications are applied.   

       Baked goods expand - if they don't have space to expand, you're making pasta, not cake. (And even pasta expands somewhat.) If you leave space for the cake to expand, it will all settle on the bottom. You could get around this in various ways. If you're making a crepe, you could have your tubecaker spin to spread the dough evenly. If you want a true cake, however, you need longer cooking. You could have your central core shrink after the dough has set on the surface, creating some space for the dough to rise.   

       A more obvious application would be to bake a rectangular flat cake that is then wrapped around a tube, sealing the edges. When finished, as the tube is pulled out of one end, the filling could be inserted in the other end. I guess that wouldn't inspire poetry though.
Yappa, Jul 06 2009
  
      
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