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Underwater plastic bag electric generator incinerator

Create energy from incinerating non-recycable plastic bags
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This fish-like machine catches plastic bags in the sea and incinerates them for energy in an ecologically safe way. Will save the lives of millions of fish and turtles.
pashute, Mar 12 2010

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       Where does it get the oxygen to burn underwater?
coprocephalous, Mar 12 2010
  

       How will it find bags in a way that uses less energy then it gets by burning them?
AutoMcDonough, Mar 12 2010
  

       How is the energy transported to point of use?
BunsenHoneydew, Mar 16 2010
  

       What is the capital of Chile?
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 16 2010
  

       How does it capture the bags but not fish, plankton, dolphins...
RayfordSteele, Mar 16 2010
  

       Why do birds suddenly appear every time it is near?
BunsenHoneydew, Mar 16 2010
  

       "What is The Carpenters. I'll take lyrics for five hundred, please".
normzone, Mar 16 2010
  

       WT...? ROTFL !!!   

       [copro] It catches the oxygen from the air when it comes up. It could use plastic bags to store the air... and then swim down with it and start filling its batteries.   

       [automc] Bags have a large amount of energy, and tend to be in near proximity between them, because their source is usually one: the same beach, the same dump blown into the sea, the same passing boat, the same water stream, and most important: the same place where the current slows and the bags come to rest. So from one "fishing spree" in a dense and baggy area, the upbegi would have a full tank of 'gas' to go on.   

       [bunsen] Once it lands on an area which really is full of plastic bags (same as finding an oil field for people), it will call in its friends via sonar, and begin incinerating and filling batteries double and triple of its own need. It then would start the long migration trip up to the polluted streams where it was manufactured, jumping up over waterfalls, and being caught by smiling able and strong electrishermen. National Geographic would send cameramen who would focus on the kids and tourists looking at the spectacular site. Of course, the further they get upstream, the more plastic bags and energy they would have.   

       [maxwell] Santiago? was? :-(   

       [rayford] It has of course computerized "bag detection" software, which shouldn't be that hard to develop. Plastic bags do have a distinctive look up close, even distinctive from jellyfish. And the teflon coated heavy duty arms have enough detectors on them to feel the difference if necessary without damaging wildlife. In any case, the upbegi can go fast, but wont when approaching an SPB (Suspected Plastic Bag). So if it was a dolphin, it presumably wouldn't just float.   

       [no one asked but] If dolphins, sharks or birds would attack it would have some routine behaviors to choose from. For a shark, it would probably be best to have some evading methods, like sending off dead fish it found (similar to helicopters trying to rid themselves from infra red ground to air missile attacks), for dolphins it could give off some friendly signals, give it a fish for friendship, and for birds it could dive and evade.   

       [honeydue] it is not yet clear, although every year, they do seem to veer off course and almost shear our poor dear. From afar they seem austere, but up close you can see them sneer under the veneer and sometimes you even hear them jeer.   

       [normzone] eet eez ze guys det hez e grate career, painting e dragons on de car's rear?
pashute, Mar 17 2010
  

       // being caught by smiling able and strong electrishermen //   

       What if they get caught by bears instead ? Any area where a large, hungry bear has just had a really nasty electric shock instead of what it thought was lunch is going to be, well, dangerous ...
8th of 7, Mar 17 2010
  

       electric bears, silly
pocmloc, Mar 17 2010
  

       pashute, you need more than just software, you need some hardware that can avoid getting it entangled with the flora and fauna, bitten by sharks, etc.   

       The large plastic floating mass in the Pacific is mostly very small bits which are not easily picked up by much of anything. If you're straining it out like a large plankton-eating whale then you're going to be eating plankton and messing with the ecosystem.
RayfordSteele, Mar 17 2010
  

       I suspect that the plastic, especially stuff like bags, are embedded in rafts of floating crap of all sorts but especially the floating sort which means sticks, wood, loose seaweed etc.
bungston, Mar 18 2010
  

       Windy days one can see the bags high up in the trees, dancing and puffing like some wonderful bag festival just for bags.   

       I have often thought this is where the clean up should begin. Then I noticed trash trucks rumbling down the highway, gleefully dispensing plastics and bits like some demented flower girl sprinkling the path for the bride.   

       I hate plastic bags.
dentworth, Mar 18 2010
  

       The more you explain it, the more it sounds like magic and bad science. The visual image of the harvest saves you from a fishboning. [ ]
BunsenHoneydew, Mar 18 2010
  

       // I hate plastic bags. //   

       And rightly so; they are the larval form of the wire coathanger, which pupates into the supermarket trolley...   

       "What is the air speed velocity of an unladen swallow ?"   

       (There are severe penalties for incorrect answers).
8th of 7, Mar 18 2010
  

       I'm giving it a +just for effort.
dentworth, Mar 19 2010
  
      
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