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Very Dary Gerbel Television Netark

It's likely that something very dary might have been happening der gerbel
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The CBS-reporter Serene Branson, who garbled a live report at the Grammys, provides some inspiration for a new kind of television reporting: approximative probable live reality reporting.

This TV-network will only feature live-reporting by people who have been brought into a medically non-threatening state similar to that experienced by Ms Branson (probably by putting electrodes into strategic areas in the brain).

We will discover some truth about the events that are covered by this TV-network. But the vagueness of the words leaves some room for free interpretation by the viewer.

It will provide a new perspective on news stories.

For those who haven't seen Ms Branson's bizarre and strangely poetic performance, see link.

django, Feb 19 2011

Serene Branson http://www.youtube....HM8&feature=related
Apparently she suffered from a special form of migraine [django, Feb 19 2011]

Kids, don't try this at home. http://www.medscape...iewarticle/415056_3
[mouseposture, Feb 19 2011]

youtube.com: JJ reading FW http://www.youtube....watch?v=JtOQi7xspRc
[rcarty, Feb 20 2011]

Google... http://www.google.com/webhp?hl=xx-bork
...provides this very service. [DrBob, Feb 21 2011]

[link]






       Thing is, she makes a lot more sense that way.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2011
  

       Oliver Sachs describes some interesting things related not to aphasia, but to the reverse conditions - inability to comprehend. He describes two groups of patients listening to a speech on the telly. One group could not understand the words, but extracted meaning (which was not necessarily the same as that conveyed by the words) from the emotional tones in the speech. The other group had an inability to recognise emotion or allusions in the speech, and could only grasp the absolute literal meaning of the words. Apparently the first group were far more successful in understanding the speech.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2011
  

       ...which says a lot about how they write speeches for the telly.
Wrongfellow, Feb 19 2011
  

       Good it was only migraine. I woulda thought stroke.   

       That state could be induced reversibly with a simple endovascular procedure.
mouseposture, Feb 19 2011
  

       It could? Tell more.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2011
  

       I'm thinking of the highly selective Wada test. A fancy, steerable catheter is inserted into the femoral artery at the groin, then maneuvered up the aorta, through the carotid into the middle cerebral artery, then into a selected tributary of that artery, and so on. At branch points, they squirt a puff of radioopaque dye from the catheter tip, and immediately X-ray the head: that's how they see where they're going.   

       When they've steered the catheter into the tributary artery supplying the portion of cortex that interests them, they squirt in a little anesthesia, and temporarily anesthetize it. While this is happening, a neurologist is examining the patient, to see if any symptoms develop. The point is to see whether that patch of cortex was doing anything useful, so that a neurosurgeon can decide whether to cut it out. This (or something like it) is the procedure [nineteenthly]'s friend had in Turkey (or was it Morocco?)   

       I know that aphasia is routinely, reversibly induced this way; I'm pretty sure a fluent aphasia could be, if the target cortex were Wernicke's area. I'll see if I can find a link.   

       Edit: Here you are <link> Amusingly, the abstract contains a paraphasia: "expected Wernicke area" should be "expected Wernicke aphasia" I think.
mouseposture, Feb 19 2011
  

       Intriguing! I have learned something, thank you. I didn't realize that arterial navigation was so precise!   

       I think I would pay to have this done - it would be fascinating to explore aphasia, split-brain, prosopagnosia... There's a business opportunity here.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 19 2011
  

       It was in Morocco and yes, that was exactly what he had done. He also tried to give up sleeping. He's very strange. Would you like me to try to get in touch with him?
nineteenthly, Feb 19 2011
  

       I don't know about anyone else but that made sense to me like Joyce's Finnegan's Wake. link.   

       All Entertainment reporting should be delivered this way because it's nonsense claptrap at essence.
rcarty, Feb 20 2011
  

       If someone with a migraine had been watching that, they would've understood it perfectly.
nineteenthly, Feb 20 2011
  

       //He's very strange. Would you like me to try to get in touch with him?//   

       Hmm. Strange is good. Very strange is.... I think I'll pass, but thanks.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2011
  

       //Would you like me to try to get in touch with him?// Well, I'm curious to know if he's still alive. But only if you promise not to embark on any "interesting" projects he suggests. Someone like that, I'm not sure it's even safe to take his advice on where to eat lunch.   

       [MB] re: commercial opportunities, I think the way to monetize it is to have it done to yourself (in Morocco, natch) and write a book about the experience.
mouseposture, Feb 20 2011
  

       The book would be intesthilling if it's now a reservigin procesuing.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2011
  

       Oh, did I forget to mention it's only reversible provided there are no complications?
mouseposture, Feb 20 2011
  

       Yes, i haven't exactly got plans to pursue projects that are quite like that. My own attempts at the extreme lie elsewhere, anatomically speaking.
nineteenthly, Feb 20 2011
  

       It doesn't work, [nineteenthly]. Save your money!
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2011
  

       Not the kind of thing you're likely to see in spam, [MB], unless your spam's really exotic.
nineteenthly, Feb 20 2011
  

       Yeah, NOW I know it's spam.
MaxwellBuchanan, Feb 20 2011
  

       I'm trying to follow along, so far I understand that [19thly] is trying to get some part of his anatomy to lie elsewhere, preferably in canned luncheon meat?
rcarty, Feb 20 2011
  

       Not so much a Fail as an Unwin.
bigsleep, Feb 20 2011
  

       //[19thly] is trying to get some part of his anatomy to lie elsewhere, preferably in canned luncheon meat// Very exotic spam indeed.
mouseposture, Feb 20 2011
  

       I'm planning to tin my anatomy canly as being in the marble, which brings us back to the original idea.
nineteenthly, Feb 20 2011
  

       You changed your mind and decided to put your brain in a jar havenchoo?
rcarty, Feb 21 2011
  

       I thought he was just moving to a bigger jar.
FlyingToaster, Feb 21 2011
  
      
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