Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Call Ambulance,
Rebuild Kitchen.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

user:
pass:
register,


                                 

penis extender for discreet urination

a tube runs down one pantleg so you need only stand with nonchalance over a sewer or patch of weeds
  (+2)
(+2)
  [vote for,
against]

tube comes all the way down to pavement level. sure you might get some urine on the bottom of your shoe, but better than getting caught behind a car with your fly down, or having to pay for a toilet in paris.

it is public urination, but no one will notice.

also great on long car trips when you're pressed for time. in this case, just extend the tube from the pantleg to the base of the door and close the door on the hose. there will be enough space left in the crimped tube for the urine to still drain. further, when you're in motion on the highway, the urine atomizes at the mouth of the tube [perhaps mouth is a poor label for the output end. or either end for that matter.] just like the fecal matter that is "flushed" from the storage compartment of jumbo jets over unsuspecting neighborhoods.

there is a urine catcher for women used by private pilots called the Lady-J Adapter. the penis extender tube could also be fit to the Lady.

gnormal, Feb 05 2001

portable piss pots http://www.halfbake...table_20piss_20pots
Halfbaked, sort of. [egnor, Feb 05 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Restop http://www.quakepro.com/Restop/
Baked #1. [egnor, Feb 05 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Stadium Pal http://stadiumpal.com/
Baked #2. [egnor, Feb 05 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

TravelJohn http://www.traveljohn.com/
Baked #3. [egnor, Feb 05 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

Baked! EZ-Leaker! http://ezleaker.com/
a friend of mine found this in a biker magazine. it sounds exactly like my vision, but they dont have a picture. [gnormal, Feb 05 2001, last modified Oct 04 2004]

[link]






       Aircraft do not in fact emit fecal matter midflight; it's pumped out at the destination.
egnor, Feb 05 2001
  

       This is true, but sometimes the valves leak. I had a friend who used to work for an airline, and among other duties was pumping out the tanks. One of the common mishaps was not locking the hose on correctly, and when you turn the valve to dump the tank, it blows the hose off and dumps the blue liquid <among other things. Ew.> on you...It stained skin for quite a while, and they called it getting smurfed...He said that he'd seen big blue blocks of frozen...stuff...hanging onto the outlet sometimes after the plane landed...
StarChaser, Feb 05 2001
  

       <grins> I don't think he meant 'straight out', more like a condom with a tube or something...
StarChaser, Feb 05 2001
  

       If we're gonna have a Penis Extender, then "discreet urination" is way down on the list of reasons for having it.
Jim, Feb 05 2001, last modified Feb 06 2001
  

       someone is going to die laughing at this site - don't say I did'nt warn y
po, Nov 16 2001
  

       Perhaps you may benefit from an organ transplanted from a horse.
thumbwax, Nov 17 2001
  

       I think this has already been baked. Gnorm, check out the stadium pal link. It's pretty much the same as your idea only the whizz is emptied into a plastic storage bag.
non-eatable, Aug 13 2002
  

       //He said that he'd seen big blue blocks of frozen...stuff...//   

       That would be an ICBM....   

       (where the hell is StarChaser these days?)
Susen, Aug 13 2002
  

       I think one of yer dogs got him.   

       [Blast - one of my all-time favorite comments is missing from between his annotations. Oh well.]
DrCurry, Aug 13 2002
  

       That'll teach you to delete your elf. And my dogs are pleading the 5th.
Susen, Aug 13 2002
  

       //the penis extender tube could also be fit to the Lady//   

       um, which ladies have you been hanging around? Discreet urination has been baked anyway.
Shadow Phoenix, Oct 07 2007
  
      
[annotate]
  


 

back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle