Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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universal Valentine's bitterness signal

Don't even THINK about wishing me a...
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For people with a recent history of severe romantic disappointment (or not so recent, but they just don't get over ANYTHING), an unsolicited "Happy Valentine's Day!" is about as welcome as, say, a "Happy Hallowe'en" to Jerry Falwell or "Happy Bastille Day" to Marie Antoinette.

An unobtrusive but easily visible black paper heart, worn on the sleeve, should be a commonly understood sign for well-wishers to keep it to themselves if they know what's good for them.

It should also be illegal to say "cheer up" to the black-hearted. However, a gray heart may be worn by those who would reluctantly accept some cheering up.

hob, Feb 14 2002

http://www.halfbake...20the_20Unpartnered Don't wish me a happy this either. [hob, Feb 14 2002]

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       May you have an uneventful day.
bristolz, Feb 14 2002
  

       paper hearts attached to the sleeve will tear (if pinned) or mess up a really nice shirt (if glued). How about a simple black ribbon worn on the front of the shirt. Makes for easier visibility too.   

       bliss, can I get one of those hugs for the relationship impaired?   

       (Later: thanks Bliss!)
runforrestrun, Feb 14 2002
  

       Valentine's Day is suppoesed to help you overcome those feelings [hob]. Like [bristolz] I'll wish you an uneventful day; but if you want to guarantee one, stay home huddled under the covers.
phoenix, Feb 14 2002
  

       Have a beige day. :-|
RayfordSteele, Feb 14 2002
  

       ¢ø
¯ 1st two knuckles=abbreviated heart.
reensure, Feb 14 2002
  

       Wahey! Its the annual "Valintine's Day is crap because I am single" idea! Susan is here in spirit...
mcscotland, Feb 14 2002
  

       [mcscotland] pardon me, I said no such thing... I encourage everyone to have your fun to the fullest, as long as you don't insist on nudging my self-pity by wishing me a happy day. Thus my proposed custom, the BLACK HEART, which seems like a simple and practical way to avoid these discussions.
hob, Feb 14 2002
  

       I am married with children - it's still crap. ;o}
arora, Feb 14 2002
  

       If you have a good dog, every day is valentine's day. Heh heh heh.
Dog Ed, Feb 14 2002
  

       The only thing missing in my gym this evening was a big banner reading 'Depressed Singles Night'.
-alx, Feb 14 2002
  

       i have a partner, and i still think it's crap, too. crap, crap, crap. I just don't get it. total strangers wished me a happy valentine's day this morning, too, and i had trouble responding in a way that wasn't rude...
romy, Feb 14 2002
  

       see, what gets me is that this stupid holiday is supposed to be about love. or am I misunderstanding something here? so, if I'm right, then why is the friggin' UPS guy wishing me a happy V day? or my boss, for that matter? seems somehow grotesquely intimate, in a Barbie-Land, Hallmark, plastic pink heart kind of way. my suggestion? don't wish anyone a damn happy V day unless you love them and you're pretty sure they love you, too.
romy, Feb 14 2002
  

       I tried to convey the impression by wearing red and black (tastefully, not Rocky Horror-style).   

       Unfortunately, having an uneventful day isn't a good thing either in my case. Conflicting days.
bookworm, Feb 14 2002
  

       A friend of mine took his wife to the card shop, and picked out a Valentine card. He showed it to her and asked if she liked it. She said she did. He put it back on the rack and said, "okay, that's the one I would have gotten you."   

       I don't think I wished anyone a _damn_ happy V day, but I did as romy suggested, and only wished it to those I love (and I'm reasonably sure love me. It does happen).   

       hob, wearing a heart such as this on your sleeve is a good way to ensure you have many more severe romantic disappointments in the future. Fishbone. A real bony one too, like a mackerel.
waugsqueke, Feb 15 2002
  

       // ... and only wished it to those I love (and I'm reasonably sure love me. It does happen). //   

       Oh sure . . . now you are really dreaming, waugs.
bristolz, Feb 15 2002
  

       Yeah. What the hell was I thinking? Must have had too much Chablis last night.
waugsqueke, Feb 15 2002
  

       //Wahey! Its the annual "Valintine's Day is crap because I am single" idea! //   

       mcscotland, it's been my experience that those that complain the most about V-Day are angry b/c they have been hurt deeply. I think bliss has the right idea about giving hugs to the relationship impaired. Croissant for that idea!
runforrestrun, Feb 15 2002
  

       Looks like Cupid's arrows are fatal.
thumbwax, Feb 15 2002
  

       There is entirely too much emphasis already placed on the status of Valentine's day as a "black" holiday.
reensure, Feb 15 2002
  

       Watchoo talkin' 'bout Willis?
thumbwax, Feb 16 2002
  
      
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