xenzag

a.k.a. The Ulcer-Fry

xenzag@hotmail.com

what is the sound of one cow clapping?

[Sep 18 2005, last modified May 21 2009]

!00 Watt Heads (+9, -4)
1, 2, boil up my stew (+9, -3)
1.5 legged trouser lamp (+11, -4)
10 Horse Race Lumpy Roulette (+13, -2)
10 Sparrows That Live In The Moon (+35, -3)
12 Tree-matics Avenue (+12, -1)
23.976 fps Glasses (+11, -4)
240 Volt Belt (+13, -3)
£5Yo-Yo-Blair Coins (+11, -2)
765,000 volt nests (+5, -2)
9 Months Later Balloon Baby (+28, -3)
A Bigger Scream (+19, -2)
A Cursory Glance (+6, -2)
A Dinner Date With Dracula (+5)
A Flock of Keys (+8)
A Large Black Foot in the Sky (+6, -2)
A License to Calculate (+8, -2)
A Pocket Lights Now (+6, -7)
A Small Naked Man Persuing A Large Pigeon (+11, -2)
A Small Threaded Hole (+17, -2)
A Yard of Tea (+5, -3)
Abbey Road Tread-mill (+13, -3)
Abdomillumen (+3, -3)
Action Man's Fluxus Phone (+5, -1)
Aerial of Thorns (+9, -1)
Aerialodactyl (+19, -3)
Alimentary my Dear Watson (+14, -2)
Anatomical Drinking Straw (+12)
Angle of the North (+7, -7)
Anglepoise Street Lamp (+11)
Ant Farm Bannisters (+10, -1)
Anti-Christ Chess (+12, -3)
Anti-Snail Eggshell Sprinkler System (+7, -1)
Aqua Lego (+11, -2)
Aqua Morte (+13, -1)
Ask The Fish (+3, -4)
Attack furniture on Patrol (+9, -10)
Autoquarium (+8, -2)
Avenue of Dead Cars up in The Trees (+21, -3)
B52 Ranch (+6, -2)
bacon rind wire (+3, -5)
Bag-Pipe Centipede (+12, -5)
Baker's Gym of Hunger (+7, -3)
Bank Note With Two Reinforced Holes on One Side (+14)
Barbarella Massage Bench (+9, -1)
bard-wire fence (+8, -1)
Baseball Cap Game for Morons (+11)
Beard Cyclops (+10, -3)
Beard Transplant Registry (+2, -2)
beardaclava (+5, -2)
bed'n'breakfast (+7)
Bed of Finger-Nails (+7, -5)
behave beehive hairdo (+7)
Belly Button Teeth (+6, -7)
Bicyclock (+11, -1)
Bird Hats (+8, -2)
Birds Who Get to Eat Cats (+12, -2)
Black Jacket Illumination (+6)
Blank-bank-note sketchbook (+47, -3)
Bleeding Bicycle Lock (Wasp Attracting) (+11)
Blego (+5, -3)
Bling-Box (+12)
Blinkini (+10, -3)
Blobbie Dazzlers (+6, -1)
Boa Scarf (+17, -1)
Boldly go where no Hadron has gone before (+12, -2)
Book of the Secreted Image (+18, -2)
Book Tongue (+4)
born again swimmingly (+12, -7)
Bouncing Ball Page Numbers (+4, -2)
Brasilicas (+7, -4)
Breakfast Hose (+5, -8)
Brick-nic Hamper (+2, -1)
Bricks of Pi (+5, -2)
Bring Me The Head of Michael Jackson (+11, -13)
Bristle Matrix Doormat (+14)
Build-a-Boulder (+5, -1)
Build-a-Jaw (+4, -1)
Busker's Ohms (+13, -1)
Buttonright (+9, -1)
Calder, Serra, Saffir-Simpson Wind Chimes (+5)
Car Ceiling Spider (+10, -2)
Car-glass (+5)
Car Gnomes (+10, -4)
Car-Kebab Ranch (+2, -2)
car-locko-dile (+12, -1)
Car Pixels (+10, -3)
Car Toothpaste (+6, -7)
carsequencer (+9, -3)
Cat-Case (+5)
CD With a Single Hair (+5, -3)
Cello-tape Dispenser With a Beak (+3)
Chainosaurus Rex (+5, -3)
Chakra 6 Wake up! Bindi Door Knocker (+5, -1)
Cheroot of Turin (+4, -1)
Chevrolet Shallots (+13, -1)
Chicken Crossing (+25)
Chicken Feet Tyre Treads (+6, -1)
Chimney Smoke Art Work (+11, -1)
Christmas Robin Attracting Beret (+4, -2)
Chubbrella (+12)
Church of Random (+9, -3)
Cigarettus Digitalus (+7, -3)
Climb Down With a Clean Pair of Hands (+4, -1)
Climbing Up The Walls of Everything (+18, -1)
Cling On Bouldervator (+6, -1)
Clock a Dildo-do (+7, -1)
Cock and Leap USB Memory Stick (+8, -1)
cogs of the realm (+14, -1)
Collector Man (+10)
Combat Frills (+15, -2)
Compass Pyjamas (+7, -2)
Computer Starting Handle (+3, -1)
Could You Resist The Hands of The Boston Strangler? (+12, -3)
Cowboy Wishbones (+9, -3)
Credit Crunch Severity Scale (+2, -2)
Croagh Patrick Pilgrimage Stair Carpet (+4)
Crumb Ring T Shirts (+6, -1)
Crutches With A Beach Setting (+23, -1)
Cursor Kebabs (+7, -1)
Cutlery with a Magnifying Lens (+8)
Dada Nests (+8, -1)
Daffodish (+18, -1)
Dante's 15º Inverse Purgatory Shopping Haj (+18, -3)
De-Fustered Golf (+4, -4)
De Selby's Cubes (+4)
De Selby's Domino Theory Apparatus (+7, -2)
De Selby's Final Suit Pocket (+12, -4)
De Selby's Perpetual Jig-Saw-Jig-Saw (+16)
De Selby's Vanishing Chain (+20, -1)
De-synchronised, Chromium Plated, Bobbing Meerkats, Zen Lake of Dark Viscosity (+25, -6)
Deep Pile Distressed Durango (+9, -2)
Delsey Coat (+9)
dentallations (+6, -3)
Desert Bonsai (+4, -1)
Digi-bell (+6, -1)
Dino-snore of Darkness (+8)
Dirt Fortified Infant Food (+8, -3)
Disharmonious Forks (+5)
Disloyalty Cards (+17, -11)
DKNYoke (+8)
Dog-gone Trousers (+3, -1)
dog motor (+4, -2)
Dog's Beaded Curtain (+11, -1)
Dogs That Eat Banks (+13, -6)
Domestic Electricity Confusing Randomiser (+6, -2)
Donald Trump Bluebottle Factory Head (+8, -1)
Donald Trump Sand Dune (+3, -1)
Door Teeth (+9, -1)
Double Breasted Accordion Waistcoat (+14, -1)
Doublebrella (+6, -6)
Drag and Drop Soap TV (+8, -2)
Drinks Bandolier (+7, -1)
Drinks Beetler (+10)
Drunk Flap (+5, -2)
Drunks' Rickshaw (+4, -2)
Dullsville Calibration System (+6, -3)
Duo-Can (+7, -2)
Duvet Snooker (+12, -1)
Dwarfalator (+8, -2)
Ear Crisps (+8, -3)
Earverts (+3, -3)
Eating With Long Tapering Bony Fingers (+3, -1)
Ecumenical Swiss Army Knife (+18, -1)
Eggs-a-sketch (+2, -2)
Eggs Over Easyrider (+4, -1)
Ego-ccino (+11)
egorrery (+6)
Elastic Unlimited (+6, -1)
Elbowgluteus Minimus (+8)
Electromagnetic Wall Ironing (+4, -2)
Enter The Room Full of Dead Chairs (+14, -3)
Euro Food Surplus Triathlon (+1, -4)
Every Dog Has Its Duplex (+2, -2)
Every Dog Has Its Warble (+3)
Eye-Seat (+5, -1)
Eye Tea Bags (+7)
Face to Facecloth (+4, -3)
Famous Buildings Termite Mounds (+3, -1)
Famous Exact Inches (+6, -1)
Famous Last Rivets (+9, -8)
Farmers Who Play With Frisbees (+16)
Fhoam! Calls (+4, -2)
Fiddler Crab Coat Sleeves (+6, -2)
Fidgeting Style-ettos (+8)
Field of Almost Identical Swaying Boulders (+34, -3)
Filing Cabinet Balconies (+4, -1)
Filing Cabinet Of Terror (+10, -2)
finger flash (+11, -2)
Fingerfork (+5)
fingerphones (+7, -1)
Fish Outa-water (+10, -2)
Fish That Take the "A" Train (+14, -2)
Fishy Fish Nets (+12, -5)
Fix Umbrayonets ! (+8, -1)
Flicking Through Magazines (+6, -2)
Floor Sanding Party Over Soles (+13, -1)
Four More Sheets (+7, -1)
Four Poster Sofa (+19, -4)
Frankenstein's Cellotape (+9)
Freeze Framous (+7, -2)
fridge belly (+10, -1)
Frolic-Blankets (+2, -1)
From CD to 3D (+4)
Frozen to The Back Teeth (+23, -4)
Funicular Spoon (+8, -2)
Genius Wheels (+6)
Gently moving river which contains the antithesis of its own crossing (+19, -8)
Geranium Shepherd (+12, -3)
Glue-Pit-Wrestling (+7)
Goat Edible Moped Humvee (+15, -1)
Google Earth Money (+16)
Grates of Hell (+54, -2)
Gravy Tower (+10, -3)
Grow Hose (+4, -1)
Guantanamo Bay Nursery Play Pen (+9, -9)
Guardian Angel Pole Dancers (+4, -3)
Guinness Hydra (+5)
gym-face-ium (+2, -1)
Gym of Parts (+6, -2)
Gym of Sighs, Groans and Roaring (+10, -2)
Hairgienist (+3)
Hairhenge (+2, -3)
Hairy Lego (+7, -1)
Half and Half Cushions (+8)
Half-Dead (+7)
Hamster's Wheel of Fortune (+7, -2)
Hand Written Novel (+20, -3)
Handkerchiefs With Extended Corners (+17, -4)
Handy Slices (+3, -1)
Happy Reaper (+4, -1)
Harmless Slapper Zapper (+7, -4)
Harmonious Level Drill (+10, -4)
Harold Lloyd Alarming Clock (+6, -1)
Hat of Mist (+31, -2)
Have Vox AC30, Will Travel (+12)
Head over Heels (+2, -2)
Hexagonal Bottle Tops (+16)
Hey - that's me (+11, -4)
Hide Behind Your Tiny Hands (+54, -7)
Hideous Pecking Bird (+21, -1)
Higgs Outcome Roulette Wheel (+17, -2)
High Rise Tents Park (+4)
Hornbrella (+4)
House of Fish (+28, -1)
Hunky Chunky Freeway Lane (+6, -2)
Hunter-rug (+7, -3)
Hurricane Reporter Wind Sock (+3, -1)
i-browse (+5, -2)
Icon Hunter Agency (+7, -4)
Imperial Thongs (+5, -2)
In a Silent Way, Under a Willow That Weeps (+11, -2)
In Space No One Can Hear You Playing Chopin (+14, -3)
In The Navy, Ironing Board (+16, -2)
indominable snowman (+3)
Infini-tie (+6)
Inkjet-Nutella (+9)
Inner-Tubular Bells (+4, -1)
Insect-Vogue (+3, -3)
Intergalactic-Ant (+5, -6)
International Dock-Yard Dominoes (+6, -1)
iPPLAUD (+9, -2)
Jaccuzzi Coral Reef (+4, -3)
Jason and The Arguenots (+29, -10)
Jeremy Clarkson Custard Gladiators (+4, -2)
Kafka's Table Top of Pusillanimous Rejection (+22, -2)
Kaligraphic Printer (+7, -3)
Keep Watching The Skips! (+16, -2)
Kepler's Coins of Motion (+6, -1)
"Kiss Me Deadly" Lap Top (+4, -3)
Kneeboxes (+12, -1)
Kneejerk Piano (+5, -1)
Knit-wits (+7)
Lap-top Laptop (+4)
Laptop SHWAIN (+4, -2)
Large Musical Cacophony Umbrella Array (+11, -1)
Laundry Channel (+23, -3)
Lava Lamp Mermaid (+5, -3)
Lawnaconda (+11, -2)
Leaning Tower of Ketchup (+15, -5)
Leg-Barrow (+7, -5)
Lego-go Shoes (+19, -2)
Lego-saurus (+3, -2)
Legotanic (+19, -5)
Let Lemurs Build Your House (+5, -3)
Lift/Stairs punishment/reward scheme (+12, -1)
Light Zeppelin (+10, -1)
Like-a-Card? (+10, -2)
Lino-teeth (+9, -1)
Lipo-Buttons (+2, -2)
Lips That Stick (+6)
Litter-Snappers (+6, -2)
Living Lounge Refinery (+1, -2)
Loaded Pogo Stick (+7, -1)
Logical Wigs of Tea (+10, -1)
Londonatomy (+2, -3)
Long-life Reflecting Moon Sheep (+24, -7)
Long Tapering Drawer of Natural Size Selection (+11, -2)
Lunar Sofas (+2, -1)
Lung Book (+21, -2)
Möbius's Trip Award (+14, -5)
Macho Mouse (+6)
Macro-Mortia (+3, -1)
Macropolitan Line (+3)
Maggot Race (+11, -1)
mahogany 137 (+7)
Make-car-nage (+2, -3)
Mallet Vision (+5, -1)
Man-Ray-Bans (+5)
Matrix Effect Photo Booth (+27, -2)
MBT Resting Parks (+3, -3)
McTartan's Chav Attracting Lake (+11, -1)
Me And My Chicken (+8, -3)
Meandering Ties (+8, -1)
Mile High, Slo-Mo Dive (+6, -2)
millipede landrowing (+4)
Morris Minotaur Labyrinth (+5, -2)
Morticulture Services Inc. (+21, -3)
Mosaic Mount Rushmore (+2)
Murmurs of Humanity at the Cardiac Jukebox (+2, -2)
Museum of Dubious Lyrical Apparatus (+27, -4)
Mutual Mugs (+1, -1)
Mystery Train (+14, -3)
nailtraits (+2, -1)
Neanderthrill Picnic Set (+7, -2)
Newton's Reactive Televisions (+8, -1)
Night Noise Shoes (+11, -2)
Non-essential Blob Of Speculative Form and Function (+20, -3)
Norton Commando Variation Zimmer (+9, -1)
Nose Guttering (+8, -2)
Nosey Parters (+16, -1)
Nostrilampus (+10, -3)
Not IQ, FlyQ (+21, -2)
Nutcracker Laptop (+8, -1)
Office Mules (+5, -3)
Old Head, New Shiny Shaft (+6, -2)
Olympic Bird Baths (+3, -2)
One Used Tube Deserves Another (+16, -4)
Op Art Venetian Blinds (+10, -1)
Oppenheim's Nikonic Sidebangs (+4)
Ortho-Flute (+5, -2)
Ouch Bumpers (+7, -1)
Outside Non-Pockets (+6, -1)
P.C.I.S. (+14)
Paddle Your Own Canu-boat (+5, -1)
Palisade Piano (+5, -1)
Parallelogram Parking Wardrobe (+6)
Parking a Boulder (+7, -2)
Pavement Chewing Gum Psychology (+4, -2)
pavement piano (+4, -2)
Pecking Order Sofa (+2, -3)
Pedestrian Dashboard (+8, -4)
Pedestrian Tow-Ball (+1, -1)
Pedigree Basalt (+10, -3)
Perfect Manly Feet (+15, -3)
Pet Food Urbane (+10, -2)
Phone Awning (+6)
Pi Tape (+10)
Piano Forké (+11, -1)
Pillow-Bash-Boing (+14, -1)
Pillow-talker (+3, -1)
Pinocchioknows (+5, -1)
Pixel-dozer (+6, -2)
Place of Broken Hearts (+18, -1)
Planet You (+10, -6)
Plug'n'Skip Handles (+7)
Pocket File with Tabs (+8, -1)
Pogo-roo (+10, -2)
Polo-nut (+9, -1)
Polo-Pad (+3, -1)
Precocious Barbie Wire (+7, -2)
Public Knife Block (+7, -4)
Pullover of Secrets (+15, -1)
Pulsating, hydro/pneumatic Pollocks (+10, -3)
Puny-versity (+6, -2)
Put Yourself Up On A Pedestal (+15, -4)
Quality Streak Chocolates (+5, -6)
QWERTY-VILLE (+15, -6)
Radiator of Aran (+6, -1)
Rapid Handrail (+12, -1)
Rat-Trap Front Door (+2)
Rest In Print (+27, -5)
Rest on Your Laurels (+10, -1)
Reverse Tazer Whale (+5, -3)
Richard Serra's Handball Court (+4)
Rings of Perpetuity (+6, -2)
Ripper-Dance (-1)
Road Bars (+14, -1)
Road Kill Book Marks (+15)
robinhoodie (+10)
Rub Out The Lines (+7)
Rubber Head Sink Plugs (+3)
Ruminant Dyson (+12, -3)
Running Man / Following Man (+50, -10)
Sandal Camp (+2, -2)
Saucer With a Small Square Recess (+21, -2)
Saws First & Asks Questions Later (+5, -2)
Schrödinger's Straw Apparatus (+5, -5)
Scumopoly (+22, -1)
Sea-Beds (+7)
Secrets of Area 51 Confetti (+11, -2)
Seen the Movie, Slept In the Room, Bought the T shirt (+8, -1)
send-a-smell (+5, -1)
Shakespeare's Thighs (+17, -2)
Shanks Anvil (+5, -1)
Sheep in Sheep's Clothing (+12, -1)
Sheep Tone Phone (+5, -1)
Sherman's Hermits (+35, -4)
Shimy-Shake Box Junction (+8, -1)
Ship-Shape-Shopping (+7, -2)
Shop Windows of Unpredictable, Reciprocated Duality (+19, -3)
Shoutcase (+13, -3)
Shrinking Ray of Interrogation (+11, -1)
siamese sleeve of seduction (+25, -1)
Side Lobes (+3)
skatecasting (+3, -2)
Skipping Rope Orchestra (+9, -1)
slightly pre-crushed cans (+4, -2)
Smart Arse (+4, -4)
Snail Koans (+10, -2)
Snow Leopard Crossings (+2, -1)
Soap Screen (+2, -2)
Sofa Crumb Tray (+11, -1)
Sofa-so-spa (+2, -1)
sofa transplant registry (+4, -2)
Soft-Shoe Shuffle on a Hot Plate (+11, -1)
Spaghetti-Knits (+14, -3)
Speed Bunnies (+6, -4)
Speleological Corridor of Fat (+7, -5)
Spelling Bees (+8, -2)
Spend a Penny to Crush a Car (+9, -2)
Splashball (+3, -2)
Spooky Desk-Hand (+4, -1)
Spring Loaded Lego (+14, -2)
Squirm-art (+4, -2)
SS Ben Hurry (+10, -4)
Star Trek Microwave (+8, -1)
Starling Engine Idea (+7, -2)
Startling High Voltage Reindeer Head Wall Light (+6, -1)
Stealth Umbrella (+5)
Stiletto-matics (+6, -2)
Stochastic Dog Fountain (+19, -3)
Strap on Snooker Chin Wheel (+8, -2)
Sun Ra's Rings of Saturn Hat (+7, -2)
Superior Articular Moving Hand Rail (+6, -1)
Supermarket Maze (+4, -1)
Surprise, Surprise, Tissue Box (+18, -6)
Surreptitious Street Combers (+5)
Sushi Library (+18, -3)
Swamp Mist Snooker (+25, -3)
Sweeney Todd Windscreen Wipers (+10, -2)
Swimming with Televisions (+16, -2)
Swiss Cheese Tie (+9, -2)
Synchronised Drowning (+12, -5)
Synchronised Swimming Wearing Frocks (+5, -1)
Tall Buildings With Furry Corners (+7, -2)
Tandem-Shoes (+8, -2)
Tanks of Shame (+9, -4)
Taxi-pedia (+25, -2)
Teeth of Wisdom (+2, -3)
Telescopic Sink Plug Hole (+11, -3)
That's A Real Grey Area (+9, -4)
The Bird Men of Alka-Selzer (+7, -2)
The Bleaching Action of Chlorine according to Busby Berkeley (+14, -2)
The Body of Chrisp (+10, -3)
The Boson's Curler (+3, -1)
The Brads! (+9, -5)
The Buddha of Ultimate Concentration (+11)
The Cat's Tongue (+3)
The Chassis Graph (+8, -1)
the creche of belles (redux) (+2, -1)
The Day of The Trolley (+5)
The Delicious Square Root of Liquorice (+7, -4)
The Devil's Breath (+29, -1)
The Early Morning Smell of Victory (+18, -1)
The Edging Goat (+5, -1)
The Hungry Spider (+14, -1)
The Impatient Hand (+17, -1)
The Lonely Sausage (+5, -3)
The Long Finger (+7, -3)
The Lovely Skips Competition (+16)
The Never Lonely Gump Stoppers (+2, -7)
The not so Great Wall of China (+10)
The Plug Upholstery Service (+10, -3)
The Reversal of the Great Greed (+8, -1)
The Spooky Hinge (+7, -1)
The Stillness of Dust (+11, -5)
The Third Glove (+13)
The Third Shoe (+2, -2)
The Tree Climbing Monkey's Bum (+24, -4)
The Ugly Baker's Ball (+13)
The Venetian Tie (+14, -1)
The Venetian Wall of Air (+9, -2)
The Wounded Finger (+31, -4)
thumbnail library (+6, -1)
Tickle my Tonsils, Ring My Bell (+7)
Tie Steriliser (+5, -2)
Tie-Suspender (+14, -2)
Tight Rope Treadmill (+28, -1)
time-twigs (+4, -1)
Times Lewd Roman (+17, -2)
Toilet Fleet (+12, -2)
Torque-wrestling (+6, -1)
Traction Iron (+12, -2)
Traffic Lights of Orloj (+12, -2)
Transparent Bagpipes (+7, -3)
tri-kini (+7, -1)
Trombonic radiator (+7, -1)
Trouser Mouth Pockets (+3, -2)
Trouser Wig (+5, -6)
Trowsels (+6, -2)
TV cosy (+9, -1)
Tyrematic Shoes (+6)
Umbrella of Fear (+15, -2)
Uncubist filter (+7, -2)
Urban Rent-a-Hammock (+6)
V6 Room Heater (+6, -3)
Venetian Blind False Eyelashes (+8)
Ventricular Mouse (+10, -1)
Vertiginous Girder Restaurant (+4, -1)
Vibrating Therapeutic Power Supply (+4)
Vortext (Basic +Delux) (+5, -3)
Wait Training Belt (+10, -6)
Wandering Bovine Traffic Flashers (+8, -3)
Watch What You're Reading (+4, -1)
Water Tank Fez Tassles (+8, -2)
Weigh Less, Pay Less (+6, -2)
Wilson & Keppel's Choreographed Roofing Felt (+6, -1)
Wirego (+4, -2)
Wise Crackers (+10, -1)
Wood Burning Mallard (+11, -1)
World Hair-suit (+4, -2)
Your Face Ironing Your Pants (+6, -1)
Your Face on Mars (+4, -4)
Your Head Kettle (+8, -1)
Your Large Building as a Television (+3, -1)
Your New Born Baby as a Happy Bluebottle (+17)
Yourtube (+11, -1)
Zen Garden Lawn Mower (+8, -1)
Zeno's Football (+14, -2)
zenspoon (+20, -9)
ZGoogol$ (+5, -5)
Zippity Undo (+25, -2)
Zoe-topiary (+26, -2)

halfbakery