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The Answering Machine 60 Second Theater is a voice acting group that calls various homes until they get an answering machine. At the beep, the troupe performs a very quick 60 second audio version of a classic play, followed by a short message asking for donations.
Brooklyn Telephone Theater
http://www.phonetheater.com
Not this. [waugsqueke, Oct 04 2004, last modified Oct 05 2004]
Drama on my answering machine.
http://www.kunarion.../I Got Problems.mp3
One of several genuine phone calls to my answering machine. This was edited to shorten the pauses and phone tones. [Amos Kito, Oct 04 2004, last modified Jul 16 2005]
[link]
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(Sotto Voce in mechanical Robot simulation)"Today is March 15"
(Female voice)"Julie, Big Julie, don't go. I've got a bad feeling about the Senate today"
(Elvis impersonator) "I don't see how I've got a choice, Honey. They need me there today, we're making history."
(F.v.)"Oh, you're such a brute!".
<Door slams>
(Cobbler. in Harlem patois)"Got sole/soul?"
(Elvis) "Get a job, maggot!"
(Cobbler) 'You'll be sorry you dissed me, man!"
<Footsteps retreating, even though Julius is wearing sandals>
And now, a quick word from our sponsors, Prudential Life. |
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[annotation by UnaBubba, Mar 15 2001. Had to include that, UB. One of your finer moments.] |
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I was reading it, thinking... "this looks familiar." |
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But lo, what light in yonder window breaks?
Oh, it's you lot. Please leave your play after the tone. |
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(Sotto Voce in mechanical Robot simulation): "Today is March 15"
(Fatima Bin BulBul Rasheed): Saddie, Big Saddie, don't go. I've got a bad feeling about the Central Republican Palace Of The Big Kahuna today. <voice is muffled, by her heavy, Saddam-lookalike moustache>
(Saddam double) "I don't see how I've got a choice, my little honey bee. They need me there today, we're making history."
(Fatima Bin BulBul Rasheed)"Oh, you're such a brute!".
<Door slams>
(Shoe vendor, in Bazaar patois)"Got nukes?"
(Saddam double) "Get a gun and report to a recruiting depot, maggot!"
(Shoe vendor) "May the turds of a thousand syphilitic camels miraculously appear in your nostrils!"
<Shot rings out><sounds of gurgling, dying gasps>
(Shoe vendor) "Beware the cruise missiles of Mar..."
<Sounds of organised rally assembling, on the Avenue Of The Glorious Martyrs>
And now, a quick word from our sponsors, The Chairman Of The Joint Chiefs Of Staff |
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Reminds me of a classic Robin Williams routine. |
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Sometimes you want to vote for an idea twice. This time I got to do it. |
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“Set halfbaking in one eye and woik in th' other, and I will look on both indifferently. I love then name of halfbaking more than I fear woik”. – JC (well…sorta) |
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Glad you posted it again – I didn’t see it first time ‘round. |
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People record dramas similar to that on my answering machine from time to time [link].
I'd much prefer a professional performance. |
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"... appears he was bitten, in the night."
"Bitten, you say?"
"Oh yes, nasty bite on the leg. Took the whole leg, it seems." |
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I dont get the point are you guys listing ideas that have already been implemented but are cool? |
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Not sure I understand what you're asking. This idea, to my knowledge, has not been implemented. |
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A sixty second answering machine sitting on a stool in the middle of the stage. Then a loooooooooooonnng intermission. Then a chance meeting and quick exit. That's my kind of theatre. |
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"Please leave a message or short entertaining session of performance art." + |
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The answering machine taught actors everywhere not to put so much emphasis on a live performance. |
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Thus spake George Orwell... |
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There's no reason why this couldn't be a traditional performance as well - a theatre company which perfoms 60-second versions of classic works, each one preceded by a phonecall being made to someone's answering machine. The ringing and answering machine welcome would be broadcast over the theatre's PA system and then the live performance would be recorded as the message. The answering machines will be chosen at random from those submitted by the audience. |
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How can people be voting against this? |
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Still don't know what the actors do if they DON'T get an answering machine. Just hang up on you? |
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Most people hang up if no-one answers the 'phone. |
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That's annoying to get calls and no one's there. Maybe make this a subscription thing? |
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