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Back-Kneading, Baby Doll-Legged, Musical Backpack

Tiny feet step, stomp and bop all over your back.
 
(+2, -2)
  [vote for,
against]

Don this rhythmic rucksack and choose a tune from its CD player or even hum or whistle, and its nimble, pneumatic, nymph limbs will do a dance, to rub and relax tired back muscles. The whole ten pound pack of music recognition software, air pump, spaghetti array of hoses and 50 pairs of natural rubber, doll legs that inflate and deflate in swift tempo, can be worn while prone or when walking or even jogging.

Many musical massages are included, from Viennese waltzes and Polish polkas to military parades and even a marathon accompanied by the equipment’s panting and puffing and pounding feet. Try the mute, random mode and then guess if your spine is being pummeled by an infant line dance or River Dance.

FarmerJohn, Jun 18 2003

[link]






       Creepy.
phoenix, Jun 18 2003
  

       How do you come up with this stuff???? Man....i want some of whatever it is you're taking!!! Obviously it's not your run of the mill stuff because it surely isn't messing with your cognitive abilities! :)
justadesigner, Jun 18 2003
  

       Bow before FarmerJohn
thumbwax, Jun 18 2003
  

       [just...] My mind is drug-free but maybe peculiarly wired.   

       [thumb...] I am but a pinky before you.
FarmerJohn, Jun 18 2003
  

       Well, I was making "music" by dancing a baby delicately on a piano keyboard yesterday and that was kinda fun. On that not quite relevant basis I gave this a +
half, Jun 18 2003
  

       Got this idea while reading Discworld and coming across somebody being trampled by the Luggage, yes?
Tabbyclaw, Nov 26 2003
  

       I saw the words "nimble" and "nymph limbs," imagined some sort of sex doll, and immidiately attributed this idea to [benfrost]. Imagine my suprise when I find that it in fact originated in the mind of the clockmaster, [FJ].
Eugene, Nov 26 2003
  
      
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