Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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  [vote for,

I'm nervous because this one feels like I am channeling something so special.

This morning I stood on a rooftop in the freezing cold easily 50 stories above Manhattan, I was there for work. It has been a few very difficult weeks for me and while my troubles are not gone I experienced a moment of pure joy and I recognized it. There I was thinking how good it felt to be where I was,felt like troubles couldn't reach me, standing there before this breath taking view in the screaming cold wind I wondered how could I effectively represent this instance of joy?


In that moment I needed to be able to release a small helium filled green balloon from my crotch automatically effortlessly unexpectedly so that people could truly know that I was, in that moment feeling happy.

Kind of like a physical emotional exclamation point if you will. When something pleases you, you release a balloon from your spot.

These are pants with two low profile small form factor helium canisters stitched into the seams on the sides of your legs connected to a mechanism at the bulky groin that inflates small colored balloons unzips and releases the balloons into the atmosphere on demand.

The wearer could trigger the release and specify balloon color with some practiced leg motions.

Naturally I would release an api so that programmers would be able to customize their own triggers and controls hopefully able to offer a thought controlled Balloonicker Release.

vfrackis, Mar 07 2014


       There's been a lot of loose talk recently about parallel universes, and also about the possibility that the universe is a cyclical phenomenon which recurs every few tens of billions of years. If either of these theories holds up, this means that there are (or have been) an infinite number of other planets like Earth.   

       If that is the case, then everything that has happened or will happen on Earth must have happened (or be happening) an infinite number of times on other Earths in other universes.   

       Nevertheless, I am pretty sure that the phrase //In that moment I needed to be able to release a small helium filled green balloon from my crotch // has only been written once.
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 07 2014

       That may, in fact, become the unique identifier of this timeline... thanksalot vf.   

       "Is that a small green helium-filled balloon in your pants ? or are you just happy to see me."
FlyingToaster, Mar 07 2014

       [vf], you're on your own. Don't expect anyone here to put up bail for you. You have been warned.
8th of 7, Mar 07 2014

       Wouldnt it be Kballoonickers with a silent K at the beginning?
JesusHChrist, Mar 07 2014

       On bad days, it could drop little pellet-like balloo-hoos from behind, filled with a mixture of sulphur hexafluoride (see? I told you I'd lurked round here a long time), hydrogen sulphide, and a little bit of stagnant water.
skoomphemph, Mar 07 2014

       I'd wear the originals. Are reloads expensive?
normzone, Mar 07 2014

       Brilliant and triumphant [+]. I'm going to immediately shelve my project based around the emission of methane from my... Well I'm going to shelve my project in favour of this one.
AusCan531, Mar 07 2014

       (making a guest appearance), I voted +.
sqeaketh the wheel, Mar 08 2014

       A rich, buttery crescent-shaped balloon emerges and floats up towards [vfrackis]. [+]
pertinax, Mar 09 2014

       Stay around sqeakie, you are missed.   

       About the idea of a balloon floating outta your crotch, well I guess I gotta love it. It's too weird to pick on.
blissmiss, Mar 09 2014

       bizarre [+]
Voice, Mar 10 2014

       //If that is the case, then everything that has happened or will happen on Earth must have happened (or be happening) an infinite number of times on other Earths in other universes.// - [Max-B] I think this is a fallacy, but I'm not sure I can prove it (or I could have said this margin is not sufficently big to hold my proof, I suppose...). As an analogy, if I have an infinite sequence of digits between 0 and 9, your statement is equivalent to saying that every possible sequence of 11 digits is somewhere in the sequence. However I don't think this has to be the case - i.e. my phone number might not be in the sequence.
hippo, Mar 10 2014

       I think it depends on the sequence - if there is a (pseudorandom/infinite) sequence of numbers that contains your phone number in one portion, is it not possible that the same sequence will repeat at some stage later on?   

       i.e. the sequence 0.1111111... is infinite, but definitely doesn't contain my phone number - however, say the sequence 1.618033 988749 894848 204586 834... contains my number - let's say my number were 3988749, it's already established that number is "possible" within that sequence, in a way that 3988749 is not "possible" within the sequence 0.1111111.... - it may well be the case that the same number is present within that sequence an infinite number of times.   

       So what does that say about sequences, randomness and infinity? I think it shows that it's not sufficient to say a sequence is merely infinite in order for it to contain every possibility - it must also be infinite and "possible" to contain the possibilities under speculation - maybe the word "possible" in this case can also be replaced with the word "random" - where "random" might be a property that provides us with certainty of an event (or in this instance a particular subsequence to exist) or maybe it's something deeper than that. Indeed, you might define a property "x" in terms that for any sequence, for it to be "x", it must, after some infinite number of iterations, generate a specific subsequence once (and I think by definition, if it manages to do it once, then it must do it an infinite number of times)   

       Quite what this "x" factor is, is yet to be discovered - and may be a way of measuring a particular type of irrationality/randomness - But that's where it starts getting tricky, proof-wise.   

       A separate question might be whether an infinite stack of universes might also exhibit this "x" factor - and again, the jury's out on that one - but it is at least an interesting question.
Zeuxis, Mar 10 2014

       I'm sure there is some city ordinance forbidding such practices...there usually is...spoilsports.
not_morrison_rm, Mar 10 2014

       [+] Well written and cool idea. (I hope they didn't look like MC Hammer Pants!)
xandram, Mar 10 2014

       Balloon snickers
popbottle, Mar 11 2014

       wow controversial endorsement MB thanks   

       I thought a red balloon could be a sadness release but then colors mean different things to different people so the wearer should get to decide what color balloon to release.
vfrackis, Mar 13 2014

       ^mood balloons ?
FlyingToaster, Mar 13 2014

       that's funny and cute, but i think what you meant by 'balloonickers' already exists . it's called a serene smile. if you want to broadcast serenity, that usually requires shouting for joy.   

       but yea, youre idea made me laugh. you must have fellt good today. i'm about to go to sleep about 20 floors above manhattan. sleeping in a cubicle surrounded by cubicles and roads we call a city.   

       just so ya know. i gave you a roll.
teslaberry, Mar 14 2014

       Clearly it should be a white or clear balloon on a short string resembling a much magnified sperm.
rcarty, Mar 14 2014

       Would it inflate to one of those long thin balloons before rising out of your pants, or be a more spherical one?
RayfordSteele, Mar 14 2014


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