Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Fashion beard net

Adorn him!
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Tattooed young men, with short Brilliantined hair and long mountain man beards. They are not just for Portland any more. They are the future.

We at BUNGCO are a little mystified because it looks like a lot of work for these men. But we like this future better than the one with the radioactive cat zombies and cast-iron pantaloons, so OK. OK!

Back to the practical: one could make a case that these bearded young men should be wearing beard nets, not spilling their shed curlies over everything they encounter. Certainly when they lean forward over the food they are making and serving to you, beard tips gently brushing your soup. But beard nets are very plebian, very workaday and hygienically correct is not part of the look these men wish to communicate.

No worries any any of these fronts with the BUNGCO beard nets! Semiopaque paisleys and manly designs offer tantalizing glimpses of the confined beardly vigor, highlighted by metallic threads and - for the bold - sequins. Now, like Rastafarii, the bearded can grow their festoonings to a length that would be impractical for day to day affairs. Confine that growth to the net during the day, and then when you are among your own kind after hours, show them how long it can get!

bungston, Aug 13 2016

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       <Forster>   

       "[Bungston], you're having a psychotic episode. Thank you for sharing it with us."   

       </Forster>
8th of 7, Aug 13 2016
  

       I once advertised a range of Beard Boxes. These were custom shaped light wooden boxes (constructed by me) that entirely covered and contained any beard, and moustache area. There were few "takers" but I might go for a re-launch some day, now that beards are de rigueur again. I even grew mine back after shaving it off in 1998. Full approval given here {+} note curly beard-like brackets.
xenzag, Aug 13 2016
  

       Beard lingerie would make kissing an even more sensual endeavour.
wjt, Aug 13 2016
  

       Every man should have a beard. Wearing it on one's face, however, is simply unhygienic.
MaxwellBuchanan, Aug 13 2016
  
      
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