h a l f b a k e r y
(Rolling in flour, halfbaking my ass off)
add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random
news, help, about, links, report a problem
or get an account
One site to bring them all and in the darkness subtly mess with them
Resumes - they have become the phenotype. But yet how reliable are these things? One can search for an individual and sometimes find, among other tidbits, his or her resume stuffed and mounted for public inspection. Yet these things are far flung and scattered. The social networkologists unconvincingly
assure us that social media can be used for organized resume exchange, but here at BUNGCO such discourse is filed under "BAH".
Yes, the gathering should be done by a disinterested third party, which not only invites submissions (preferably the abject type) but also trolls the web and gathers other resumes found hither and yon.
The resume repository is disinterested in the individuals represented, and also has no employment or positions of any sort. The repository is, however, interested in the possibility of humor, as well as providing a plausible reason why ones resume should have been larded with lies and outlandishness (link). Some resumes will have new categories inserted: movie roles (all minor and uncredited but described in detail), dental work (broken into bulleted points), body measurements, celebrity acquaintances, feats of athletic prowess once accomplished, and so on. There will be nothing malicious, using our definition of malice, but lots of things that might provide jumping off points for interviewers.
[bungston, May 16 2012]
||Most properly filed under "Creative Fiction"
||I thought this was going to be some sort of specialized
trash can for HR departments.
||I went to school with a couple people who got good jobs
by adding a degree to their resume even though they
never graduated. Why not lie to get a job you wouldn't
get otherwise? Unless of course the job is way over your
head, for instance a crane operator.
||May I just interject for the smallest inkling of a
subfraction of a moment to point out, at the risk
of not failing to appear less than unpendantic,
that word "resumé" is favoured with that up-
gradiented diacritic which grammarians are wont
to refer to as an acute accent?
||In the absence of such a superjected inflection,
the word becomes merely "resume", from the
prefix "re" meaning again, the the Japanese
"sumo", meaning to wrestle. Hence, to wrestle
||There' s no key for an upgradiened diacritric on most
keyboards in the English speaking world. However some of
these may satisfy: Resume/ resume' resume7 resume-
||é is not part of the english language last time I checked. Or that little dangling 5 off the C. But maybe you islanders are still tweaking it; good for you! Re tweaks - I would suggest a jump into the pool rather than easing in: if you like stuff hovering over your letters you should quit halfstepping and get some ќ and ő and their kin. Plus all the umlauts you can stand; Umlaut is such a popular first name in England maybe this too has already been done.
||Most of your misreadings seem to culminate with snapping that glove back on. I am getting suspicious...