Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Sibtutles

Mystery-Science-Thearter-3000 meets Ong-Bak.
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My hearing is weird.
I can hear a conversation three tables away and not be able to separate my dinner companions' voices above the din. I lip-read a lot.
Sometimes my blunders are cause for hilarity. Other times whichever foot I currently have stuck in my mouth is met with a blank stare or anger.

This may have an upside...

A new feature where subtitles of films have been written only by professional lip-readers who have never seen the clip they are about to translate.
Even foreign films would be translated into whatever it appeared the actors were saying in in a different language regardless of context.


Inspired by... Dubspeak
[2 fries shy of a happy meal, Mar 20 2014]

http://en.wikipedia...s_Up,_Tiger_Lily%3F [not_morrison_rm, Mar 20 2014]

the old don`t know where they are and don`t care routine http://www.youtube....watch?v=h1WZ6a6YYJg
[not_morrison_rm, Mar 20 2014, last modified Mar 21 2014]

Bad Lip Readings http://m.youtube.com/user/BadLipReading
Not quite the idea, but fairly close. [Hive_Mind, Mar 26 2014]

[link]






       Hmm, showing my age here, but in the Kentucky Fried Movie, they have an entire Cantonese kung-fu section where none of the lip movements is even vaguely like what is said.   

       Not to mention "What's Up, Tiger Lily?"...you did however get 1 bun from me.
not_morrison_rm, Mar 20 2014
  

       This idea reminds me of the following passage from Peter Fleming's memoir "Travels in Tartary" (1934):   

       "The officers were talking in the next room, and I noticed as I have often noticed before the strange effect of going to sleep to the sound of foreign words. You do not know the language, and your mind, sliding luxuriously into unconsciousness, involuntary catches a sequence of sounds and, dragging you back from the happy frontiers of oblivion, translates them automatically into some fantastic English sentence with a corresponding cadence. So you are suddenly awake again, and there is ringing urgently in your ears some such altogether unaccountable phrase as 'John said all my sea-lions were glass' or 'Why go to Crewe, Barabbas?' The tone, the vowel-sounds, of the speaker who disturbed you are exactly reproduced; but your fuddled mind has adapted them, with great rapidity, and a kind of wild ingenuity, to the word-medium in which it works. '"
pertinax, Mar 26 2014
  

       I've seen a version of this already; it IS quite amusing.
Hive_Mind, Mar 26 2014
  
      
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