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Sobering sluice

Clean and sober.
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To a molecule of ethanol, the body is like a big lake - ethanol distributes itself even through all body fluids, so theblood, urine, saliva, and vitreous humor all have the same concentration of ethanol once it has had time to equilibrate. Ethanol also comes out the pores of the skin into the air, but must vaporize to do so.

Each city has a repository where the police can leave people to sober up. It would be more efficient if there were some way to speed the sobering process. Consider that, by immersing the body in warm water, the "lake" effectively becomes larger. Ethanol can now equilibrate directly across the skin and into the exterior water.

It may be dangerous to immerse drunken persons in tubs of water. They may drown. The sobering sluice allows the drunken one to sleep on a gentle incline, with warm water running over his or her body, carrying away the toxins. Using the sluice, I hypothesize that sobering time can be sped up by 100% or more.

bungston, Feb 13 2006

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       Good idea, but unfortunately impractical. Cops don't really care about them sobering up faster, not to mention setting up a drunk-cuzzi for them.   

       Bun anyway.   

       Well [bungston], looks like you have to go back through all your ideas and delete the impractical ones. And that goes for the rest of you too. :)
ConsulFlaminicus, Feb 13 2006
  

       I cringe when I imagine what other "toxins" the drunks' bodies would introduce into any gentle flow of warm water across them. However, it does make the use of the term "sluice" more appropriate.
Canuck, Feb 13 2006
  

       //It may be dangerous to immerse drunken persons in tubs of water// But the police already have drunk tanks.
coprocephalous, Feb 13 2006
  

       Do not confuse dunk tanks with drunk tanks. Oh, well, I guess you can if you want.
bungston, Feb 13 2006
  

       If you can speed up time by more than 100%, you should let us know how in a separate idea.   

       For example: T(s) = 5 hours ; time to sober up 100% of T(s) = 5 hours Speeding up by 100% = 5hrs -5 hrs = 0 hours   

       More than 100% would cause sobering time to complete before drunkenness has completed, a logical unlikelihood.
csea, Feb 13 2006
  

       "Cause one is the lonliest number..."
normzone, Feb 14 2006
  

       Regarding [csea]'s comment on sobering up in 0 hours;
Perhaps what [bungston] meant was that the speed of sobering would increase by 100%.
If sobering up normally takes 5 hours, it could be said that the inebriated person is sobering at 1/5 soberism/hour.
Then, if the speed is increased by 100% to 2/5 soberism/hour, sobering up (attaining a value of 1 soberism, assuming 0 soberism = drunk) takes 2.5 hours.
It's all a matter of correctly applying arbitrary units (even if the units are completely ridiculous).
neutrinos_shadow, Feb 14 2006
  

       Heh. Thanks for clearing that up.   

       This seems dangerous to me. What of the detainees who are physically addicted to alcohol? Sobering them up quickly could kill them if what they need is to detox.
Shz, Feb 14 2006
  

       Man, I just keep clicking this, repeatedly mistakenly reading this as "Slobbering Juice"   

       Have already given +
DesertFox, Feb 14 2006
  

       Aw man!
My head's pounding, my hands shake, I threw up my last three cups of coffee *and* I look like a day old prune. If one more person wishes me a happy new year I'll throttle them.
  

       If you ran some of the warm water directly into the stomach, you'd get even better results. And more fluid out at the lower end.   

       Would it be possible to add some sort of salt solution to the water to increase ethanol osmosis through the skin?   

       Warm, soggy buns.
baconbrain, Feb 14 2006
  

       utery unpreactical but if would work i would get drunk even more often so that i could sit in a jucoozy and be drunk . YAY for me. BTW bun for thought.
Jammer, Feb 23 2006
  
      
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