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The Christs of Valbonne

since i'm already going straight to hell...
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Now that it has been proven beyond any shadow of a doubt that Jesus and Maggy Magdalene didn’t die, but in fact moved to France, it might be fun to make a sit-com about their zany suburban French experience.

Every episode opens with: Young Jesus Jr has a cold, but his nose is stuffed, so he yells, Maaaaaaaa, I have a code” and Maggy says, Oh my, not the DAVINCI CODE!!!” closeup of her, shocked expression, melting into a smile… (uproarious canned laughter)

They have a cock-eyed neighbor (an ex-Roman soldier) who is always coming up with some off-beat idea to make them all rich..

Jesus’s mother drops in, waaayyyy to often, to the chagrin of Maggy, who does what she can to keep the peace.

Their daughter wants to go on a date with a dress that barely covers the holiest of holies.. and Jesus puts his foot down!! (joke there somewhere)

What to give each other for Christmas!! Coloring eggs at Easter!! (Jesus wants to to go on vacation instead)

What hilarity.

r_kreher, Jul 11 2008

Jesus, The Missing Years http://www.jpshrine...ics/songs/mymy.html
Lyrics to John Prine's song. "All them people killed him and he wasn't even sick." [baconbrain, Jul 11 2008]

sellek in starring role http://www.spartanb...com/sellekfinal.jpg
[r_kreher, Jul 11 2008]

YouTube: Hangin' with Jesus http://www.youtube....watch?v=cT2i-dvqu60
There's actually quite a lot of attempts of the genre - do a search for "Jesus" and "sitcom". Don't expect it to be as funny as the plot suggestions on this post. [jutta, Jul 16 2008]

[link]






       Fantasy Casting
Jesus Christ: Leonard Rossiter
Maggy Magdo: Vanessa Paradis
Mary: Maureen Lipman
Roman Neighbour: Ted Danson
Little Becky Christ: Paul Danan
Little Troy Christ: Michael Fielding.
calum, Jul 11 2008
  

       Could we not get Tom Selleck in there?
theleopard, Jul 11 2008
  

       There's two ways to go about this, though. The first is the new-school Larry David fly-on-the-wall comedy of cringe approach with a jumped up Jesus finding it hard to adapt to the vagaries and woes modern living. The second is the Terry and June, swannee-whistle, trapped-in-a-deckchair school. Perhaps we need a comedy-ecumentical syncretism here, making use of the best of both.   

       Selleck = Jesus's Dad. Greg Evigan = Jesus's Other Dad.
calum, Jul 11 2008
  

       May I suggest Bruce Willis for the voice of the holy spirit?
theleopard, Jul 11 2008
  

       The Holy Spirit, portrayed by Stepehn Fry, should appear at inconvenient moments; since only Jesus can see it, and it is genuinely another part of his personality, this can be used to marvelous comic effect.   

       The next-door neighbour should always be pestering him to turn water into wine. At the end of every episode, Jesus gives in, just to shut him up.
8th of 7, Jul 11 2008
  

       //Fantasy Casting Jesus Christ: Leonard Rossiter//
Nah, Rossiter would be the Father, and JC would be Russell Brand. [+]
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jul 11 2008
  

       I very rarely watch television. and i certainly don't plagerize. I wrote this after seeing the very forgetable movie "Bloodline".
r_kreher, Jul 11 2008
  

       I see Tom Hanks in a silent cameo, Studying the pictures on the wall, going through all the papers in the desk, looking in the garbage.
r_kreher, Jul 11 2008
  

       I worship Russell Brand
po, Jul 11 2008
  

       // I worship Russell Brand //
Perfick.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jul 11 2008
  

       see new link to sellek in starring role...
r_kreher, Jul 11 2008
  

       Save some time, read "Lamb" by Christopher Moore. Or anything else he's written, for that matter.
normzone, Jul 12 2008
  

       Go to hell. Go directly to hell. Do not pass Go, do not collect 200 dollars.
Voice, Jul 13 2008
  

       //Lamb is the crowning achievement of Christopher Moore's storied career: fresh, wild, audacious, divinely hilarious, yet heartfelt, poignant, and alive, with a surprising reverence. Let there be rejoicing unto the world! Christopher Moore is come -- to bring truth, light, and big yuks to fans old and new with the Greatest Story Never Told!//   

       I certainly shall. Thanks for the heads up, Mr. Normzone.
r_kreher, Jul 13 2008
  

       I certainly shall. Thanks for the heads down, Mr. Voice.
r_kreher, Jul 13 2008
  

       Iconoclast??? Not me!!! I was, though, fascinated by "Da Vinci Code".   

       Then I went to see the laughable documentary "Bloodline", which tries to start where "Da Vinci Code" leaves off.   

       Did Mary Magdalene fake Jesus's death, and did they move to France? Did they? I certainly don't know. I have no idea. Personally, I think they did. And I think they had chilluns.
r_kreher, Jul 13 2008
  

       Yes. Lots of sitcoms about Jesus. I was hoping to direct this annosation more in the direction of the Bloodline... The theories that state that Mary Magdalene and Jesus married, and had children. Also Mary, and perhaps Mary and Jesus moved to France.   

       I very much enjoyed reading "The Da Vinci Code" And I liked the movie "Bloodline"... And I very much enjoy the Halfbakery.
r_kreher, Jul 17 2008
  

       And there's Thomas (Doubting Thomas), the odd friend who's always touching Jesus. And the neurotic friend, Judas, who's always trying to off himself. "The problem with crucifixion is you can never get in the last nail." What? S'been done?
luxlucet, Jul 18 2008
  

       Don't forget schizo Simon/Peter, the Messiah Denyer.
coprocephalous, Jul 18 2008
  
      
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