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Need some light reading to while away the time on the porcelain throne? Pored over every article in your emergency bathroom stash three times already? Someone used your "Classics of Literature" toilet paper roll and now you've missed the crucial five leaves (the butler did it, btw.)?
I present to
you, the Toilet Printer (TP for short). It acts as a toliet paper holder that also prints on it. Optic sensors detect perforations in the roll and determine the page size and layout. You set the number of leaves you expect to use, and the TP prints out some light reading for you. It connects to your PC (the Deluxe version can access the Internet directly and is independent of your PC), collects RSS feeds you're subscribed to, and prints out as much as fits on the set number of leaves. Or prints out the next few pages of a book you're reading this way. The TP can store bookmarks and settings for several users.
There's also the "blank" button, for when you just need some paper.
I really expected something like this to be halfbaked already, if not fully baked, but I just can't find it in any toilet paper or printer related category.
[link]
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As you may be aware, i have papers by Jean Baudrillard in the little boys' room in order not to use them as toilet paper (since it's not good enough). A slightly higher quality of document, which come to think of it might even be a blank piece of paper, would be usable for that purpose, so [+]. |
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This would be useful for printing out the degrees of my local university, where dumbing down has created an army of semi-literate, drunken, culchie headed, swamp dwelling, loo-laas (apologies for rant) |
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I think thye Viz collection of jokes would be nicely suited - they are short enough to be easy to print, and crap enough to be used as bog roll. [+] |
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Just sos ya know, many PDAs these days can synch with compatible printers via Bluetooth or USB. I'm not sure how feasible it would be to attempt to print on toilet paper, but I'm thinking it would probably be torn to shreds when going through a printer, and any paper that's robust enough to survive the printing process probably wouldn't be pleasant to wipe with. SO here's a much less expensive idea than an AI-equipped, internet-accessing printer: Get a PDA and you can browse the web all you like. You can get a new Palm Centro from Sprint for just 179.99, and it comes with a 100.00 mail-in rebate. Blackberry 8820 from T-Mobile costs 149.99 and has a 50.00 mail-in rebate. |
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Or get a Kindle 2 from Amazon.com for 350.00 and get free internet access for life. |
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Printer and ink technology are advanced enough these days to handle soft toilet paper. And printers are really cheap lately, because the companies admitted they're just in it to sell ink. |
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The rest of your anno stands, but I never let mere practicality stand in the way of halfbaking :) |
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I think I'd prefer the opportunity for some non-contact, gesture-driven gaming, designed for sitting players. |
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I think I'd prefer the opportunity for some non-contact, gesture-driven gaming, designed for sitting players ... |
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Cool. Would be nice if it could be linked to an optical
sensor/displacement sensor to give you positive feedback on
your progress. Then it could print "Nice one!" or "Mind the
Splash!" in real time. |
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