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There are times in conversation with
people when it would be advantageous to
be able to stretch out your hand and fire
flashes of lightning. Big Van der Graaff
generators could be used but are
incompatible with a modern office
environment.
This idea sugests
a simpler approach. As
you stretch out
your right arm, a switch in your left hand
is used to fire a small, heavy projectile
from a compressed air gun hidden in
your
right jacket sleeve. This trails out behind
it
a long tube of white, lightweight,
stretchy
fabric - something like a nylon stocking.
This is attached to your jacket and as this
reaches the limit of its elasticity, three
things happen: First a flashgun fires from
your jacket sleeve, illuminating the whole
tube of fabric from the inside. This is
accompanied by a sharp lightning crack
sound from speakers concealed in your
jacket lapels. Finally, the fabric is
released
to stop it flicking back at you. After a
configurable delay, a rumbling thunder
sound is played. The overall effect is that
of a streak of lightning.
--
- "What's the capital of
Slovenia?"
"Bratislava"
- "No, that's the capital of Slovakia -
Hang
on, isn't it Ljubljana?
"No, I'm
sure it's Bratislava"
- "I
dunno..."
"It's Bratislava!"
<SHAZAM!> <FLASH!> <BOOM!>
- "Uh, OK, it's Bratislava"
Similar sentiment.
Shittoon
But Less technology. Which is not the same as ButLess Technology. [bungston, Apr 18 2005]
[link]
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What's the capitol of Poland? |
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// There are times in conversation with people when it would be advantageous to be able to stretch out your hand and fire flashes of lightning. // |
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Heretofore I have been not cognizant of this. So I'm going to make a conscious effort to make note of those opportunitues going forward. |
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Thir [hippo] made a coat one day, to emulate the thtorm.
It'th lightening flath, and thunder crath were thure to do no harm. |
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Hith co-workerth and employer now paid hith wordth great heed,
for he'd punctuate each point he'd make
with pyrotechnic deed. |
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Then came the faithful day when the releathe catch did not work,
and the recoil from the faux bolt thnapped hith head back with a jerk. |
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The impact knocked him from hith feet to thprawl the boardroom floor.
Yeth, once he'd held the power of Zeuth...
now he'th jutht tho freaking Thor. |
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[2 fries] I am impressed - and strangely moved. |
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Best conversation idea ever (except, of course, for the Tumbleweed Dispenser). |
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Mister [hippo]'s so cool, he makes the earth stand still
And he tells us all where we should stand
So as not to get zapped, or see our underwear crapped
Should we attempt to shake his thunderous hand
Then something went wrong, when I doctored a song,
I got caught in a Van Der Graaff flash
At a deadly pace it singed the brows off my face
And this is how the aftermath ran: |
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Halfbaked Fiction, by the [hippo] creature
Whose idea depictions,
Will surely, truly leave you in awe,
Pick up your jaw, off the floor
At [hippo]'s late night, double feature, Film Noir Home. |
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I knew his Silent Wind Chimes were right for the times,
His Kraftwerk Mobile brilliance shone through,
And I wanted a bed that would mess with my head
His Electromagnetic Mattress could work for you, too.
You will just sit and stare at his Blowout Tread Stairs,
I'll bet using them takes lots of skills
But when [hippo] collides, with Ferris Wheel rides,
You're gonna get some magical thrills, like the: |
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Halfbaked Fiction, by the [hippo] creature
Whose idea depictions,
Will surely, truly leave you in awe,
Pick up your jaw, off the floor
At [hippo]'s late night, double feature, Film Noir Home. |
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I wanna go, oh-oh, to [hippo]'s late night, double feature, Film Noir Home.
By [hippo], oh-oh, [hippo]'s late night, double feature, Film Noir Home.
In the kitchen, at [hippo]'s late night, double feature, Film Noir Home.
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A friend had a pyroflash small enough to conceal in the palm of one's hand. Was remarkably effective, though the overall effect was slightly different (fireball as opposed to lightning). |
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And for the record, it's Ljubljana... flew into there for our honeymoon (Hides from lightning bolt). |
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Tempted to post something similar, called "Bomber Jacket" but that would lead to problems, I suspect. |
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I've got one of those pyroflash devices, too. Pity flash paper is so expensive... but anyhow, I'd love one of these too. |
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It brings to mind the Wizard Tim from the Holy Grail. |
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Or Frank'n'Furter, from Rocky Horror. |
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make it like the robe the empire from star wars wears and you'll have the ultimate in nerd apparell |
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