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Wood Throw

Step up to the classic look of wood.
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Bought a used house? Have a lot of unwanted carpet but don't want to pull it up because it's the only insulation you have? Throwing a big party? Is your boss coming over a bit sooner then you expect? Quickly class up your crib by throwing down a nice oaken or matai rug made out of the finest recycled timber.

These rugs are made of the finest hardwood flooring, supported by an aluminum base with a regular grid of soft plastic feet.

They sit solidly on your existing carpet, the edges sloped and flush with the carpet to avoid stubbed toes. Place your coffee table on it for the look of the sophisticated. Set your cat food and water bowls on it for simple convenience!

Now custom made to any dimension! First come, first served.

mylodon, Mar 27 2019

Deep_20Pile_20Distressed_20Durango why have wood when you can have 'looks like wood, but isn't wood'? [xenzag, Mar 27 2019]

Wood Floors on Carpet http://www.sallycde...od-floor-on-carpet/
Somehow I feel like this was written by gpt-2. But looks like it is basically baked. [mylodon, Mar 27 2019]

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       Where is it kept when not in use?   

       Also, what if my coffee table is more than 1m long or wide? Won't it look a bit silly?
pocmloc, Mar 27 2019
  

       // Where is it kept when not in use? //   

       Under the existing carpet, durrrr ....
8th of 7, Mar 27 2019
  

       After a while won't your guests notice that none of your doors can be opened?
hippo, Mar 27 2019
  

       No, because if you can't open any doors you won't have any guests unless they climb in through the windows.   

       Also you'll starve to death, but that's incidental..
8th of 7, Mar 27 2019
  

       True - unless the guests are already in your house when you start putting this stuff down on the floor
hippo, Mar 27 2019
  

       Indeed; athough if you're the sort of person who intentionally and systematically blocks all your doors from opening, you are very unlikely to ever have any guests, for that matter visitors of any sort ...   

       [xenzag] would be the one to ask - from the latest surveillance report, the anti-Trump barricades now fill 85% of the habitable volume of the residrnce.
8th of 7, Mar 27 2019
  

       Hm. I feel like everyone is getting hung up on a very little thing. Just stick them in the middle of the room. Nobody is going to die from using one of these. Nobody sensible puts throw rugs near doors. All throw rugs, cloth or wood, block doors.   

       And where to store?   

       Just put in the garage or anyplace you normally put unwanted throw rugs, tables, or large sheets of plywood.   

       And finally, to fully resolve the last question, and guarantee this is a superior product everyone wants, they come now in custom sizes. Just punch the dimensions you want into the online form, to suit any coffee table.
mylodon, Mar 27 2019
  

       //everyone wants// I assume you are using "to want" in the sense of "not to have"
pocmloc, Mar 27 2019
  

       Also when you throw it, how do you ensure it lands the right side up?
pocmloc, Mar 27 2019
  

       Easy.. The underside is coated in a thin layer of butter.
mylodon, Mar 27 2019
  

       ^ <Cymbal sting/>   

       // Nobody is going to die from using one of these. //   

       You really know how to spoil a beautiful moment, don't you ?
8th of 7, Mar 27 2019
  

       // And finally, to fully resolve the last question, and guarantee this is a superior product everyone wants, they come now in custom sizes. Just punch the dimensions you want into the online form, to suit any coffee table. //   

       You're going to need sufficient data for a meaningful answer.
notexactly, Mar 28 2019
  

       //Bought a used house?// Has this not happened to everyone since about 1400AD?
MaxwellBuchanan, Mar 29 2019
  

       To people other than your family, yes. Sending in a company of men-at-arms to occupy anywhere that you decide you want is not a typical approach to acquiring vacant possession.
8th of 7, Mar 29 2019
  
      
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