ultimate body piercing

have a skin-graft lined tunnel surgically created through your abdomen (avoiding any vital squidgy bits of course), preferably at an askew angle. when nicely healed (or before, for the impatient) you can put on a prepared shirt or blouse daubed with blood (fake or real, it's up to you) with holes already torn. then carefully insert a javelin-like stick though yourself. you can then nonchalantly walk down the street, seemingly oblivious to the apparent injury you have sustained. bit awkward getting on the bus, but then fashion isn't meant to be practical (i have heard of surgeons who amputate perfectly healthy limbs from people who really really want to be amputees, so this shouldn't be a problem - more or less reversible)