Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Calorie-neutral Confection

Work for food
 
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A range of desserts, snacks and chocolate bars wrapped up in layers upon layers of a tough and fibrous material, carefully calculated so that the energy expended in tearing the package open (without the use of tools) exactly balances the treat's nutritional energy content. Have as many as you like.
mitxela, Nov 05 2014

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       This would be tedious, and you would need packaging made of thick reinforced concrete to offset the energy of the food.   

       A better option would be to mix carefully quantified amounts of 2,4-DNP into the food. 2,4-DNP is a mitochondrial uncoupler which causes the body to waste large amounts of energy as heat. It ought to be possible to make calorie-neutral or calorie- negative chocolate. The downside would be that overdosing on it might be a little fatal.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 05 2014
  

       This would be tedious, and you would need packaging made of thick reinforced concrete to offset the energy of the food.   

       A better option would be to mix carefully quantified amounts of cyclopiazonic acid into the food. cyclopiazonic acid inhibits the sarco/endoplasmic reticulum calcium ATPase which causes cells to leak calcium from the sarco/endoplasmic reticulum into the cytoplasm. The cell wastes tremendous amounts of energy pumping this out, only to have it leak back in again. It ought to be possible to make calorie-neutral or calorie- negative chocolate. The downside would be that overdosing on it might be a little fatal.
bs0u0155, Nov 05 2014
  

       Just eat plain celery.
pocmloc, Nov 06 2014
  

       //cyclopiazonic acid//   

       Would that be better than DNP? What's the clearance time for cyclopiazonic acid? Does it have any other known effects?
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 06 2014
  
      
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