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God Shop
Bespoke Religions to the Gentry | |
Miraculously, most people have a religious or ethical framework that just happens to match what they want to do. But for people that find themselves out of place, why not a service where a qualified philosopher supplies a coherent and justifiable set of rules that make it a moral necessity for you to
do whatever it was you wanted to do anyway? Political systems could be supplied as well.
Jesus Christ Superstore
http://www.jesuschristsuperstore.net/
As mentioned by Mr. DeGroof (though likely not what he imagined). [mighty_cheese, Jun 29 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]
The Dept for Religious Enforcement
http://www.newadven...g/cathen/08026a.htm
I suggest this as the model constitution for the Dept. After all, if you want official recognition then you have to have properly imposed sanctions for non-compliance with your own rules. [DrBob, Jul 01 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]
[link]
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bookworm - wtf? its a guy that thinks up rules and writes them down, whats impossible about that? it wouldnt appear to require the creation of omnipotent beings. |
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It's scarcely a WIBNI: people have been doing this for themselves for thousands of years, this just saves you the problem of coming up with your own self-justificatory faith that lets you have sex with lots of young women and take their husbands' money. |
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No more having to bother yourself reading the bible, picking and mixing Eastern faiths, and boring shit like that, just submit a wish list (1. No getting up before midday. 2. All drugs allowed. 3. Lots of purple) and your man will formulate a convincing justification for having to hide yourself from Diablos the demon-god of dawn in your sacred purple vestments (sacred because of the blood of Ar-Agatha, the founder of the faith, who incidentally was a crack dealer in his spare time and also liked brandy a lot). |
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Obviously, fishboned for the social consequences. |
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//self-justificatory faith that lets you have sex with lots of young women and take their husbands' money// |
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am I missing something? How do you *get* their husbands' money? Or is this a reference to a news maker that I'm just not getting? |
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pottedstu is a gigolo? why would young women need a gigolo? I am sooooo confused..... |
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¯pfperry: /... most people have a religious or ethical framework that just happens to match what they want to do. .../
How do you figure that? |
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Why not make it a Rationalization Seminar? |
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People working at the God Shop would have to have attended the Rationalization Seminary. |
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With some 8,000 deities to choose from, the Hindus have this kinda stitched up. |
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I'm sensing some delicate irony in this idea... a little too close to a rant for comfort. But anyhoo, do we really need to aid people in their lyin' & cheatin' ways? |
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I went into the god shop and came out with nothing. I just have to figure out what that means. |
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//Political systems could be supplied as well.// |
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There's a difference? <hides under bed, with a supply of cookies, UHT milk and canned beans> |
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OK, I'm not a gigolo. I was just thinking of your basic standard David Koresh-style religious cult. Obviously it's kind of tricky if everyone can create their own cult allowing them the harem-keeping and the taking money from others, so you'd have to make the God Shop pretty expensive to allow for exclusivity. After all, when most people pick a religion they're going to want to be told they're the cool ass-kicking messiah dude, and if you've too many people thinking that, it's just going to devalue the service for everyone who pays for it. Like with overpriced designer clothes. |
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Did that make any kind of sense? |
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I don't think that the God Shop should stop at providing a bespoke ethos. They should also do all the work required to get your new religion officially recognised, otherwise what's the point? This should also bump up the cost a bit, so it should please pottedstu.
Of course, once you start letting people set up their own religions and then giving them official status you'd have to have a government department (let's call it the Department for Religious Enforcement [link added]) to 1. register with and 2. Ensure that those who subscribe to a registered religion comply with it's edicts. Sounds like great fun. |
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Already been done, it's called the First Assembly Church. |
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