Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
It's not a thing. It will be a thing.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

user:
pass:
register,


                                     

Hair Fidget Police

Clipper cops
  (+1, -6)(+1, -6)
(+1, -6)
  [vote for,
against]

The Hair Fidget Police patrol in unmarked vans, in groups of three. When they see anyone - male or female - with long hair which they are continually pushing back from their face, or fidgeting with, they leap out of their vehicle and, while two of them restrain the miscreant, the third uses a large set of industrial-grade battery-powered clippers to cut the hair to a maximum length of 75mm. If there are bald spots, that's the offenders own fault for struggling.

Haircut exemption certificates, valid for a maximum of one calendar year, can be issued but will require the signatures of two medical doctors and payment of a swingeing fee.

Non-fidgeting individuals will be allowed to walk on by, unmolested.

8th of 7, Apr 01 2015

Fidgeting http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fidgeting
seems a lot of things besides playing with hair. [popbottle, Apr 03 2015]

[link]






       Quick setting glue would work, too.
FlyingToaster, Apr 01 2015
  

       That receding thing bothering you again?
normzone, Apr 01 2015
  

       Not in the slightest - it's Other People's Fidgeting.
8th of 7, Apr 01 2015
  

       Wait - your thing's receding??
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 01 2015
  

       Ha!
blissmiss, Apr 01 2015
  

       Now bald She sat alone in the dark fidgeting with the rented wigs hair trying to recover past glories in "The Hotel RooM Rents by The Hour" the latest thriller from Aceme Press.
popbottle, Apr 02 2015
  

       What about pubes?
Your statute makes no mention of pubic hair and obviously needs an entire sub-committee to address the issue.
  

       This is just wrong. When growing up, I had a neighbor who constantly pushed my hair behind my ears, which is not the way I wore it. I wasn't fidgeting with my hair, but one should be allowed to fidget with their own hair if they want. I would say people fidgeting with other people's hair, should get their hands clipped! [-]
xandram, Apr 02 2015
  

       Sounds like a bad case of hair envy to me. Fishbone for you, baldy bonce! Nyeh, nyeh, nyeh-nyeh, nyeh! [thumbs nose in general direction of interweb]
DrBob, Apr 02 2015
  

       Yeah, what he said and did.
blissmiss, Apr 02 2015
  

       At first I though this was a police force dedicated to stopping people from malicious behavior, specifically trichotillomania. I would have bunned that. I suffer from Trichotillomania when stress enters my life. This idea is more of a rant against people who have a certain type of hair style. [-]
evilpenguin, Apr 02 2015
  

       //a rant against people who have a certain type of hair style //   

       No, not a hair style ... a fidgeting-with-the-hair habit.   

       It does say that those who do not fidget will be left alone.   

       //one should be allowed to fidget with their own hair if they want. //   

       No, they should not. Not in meetings, not at their desk, not while driving, not in the pub, not walking down the street. Not anywhere. Not ever. Never.   

       // I would say people fidgeting with other people's hair, should get their hands clipped! //   

       We have no objection to that.
8th of 7, Apr 02 2015
  

       If there's a genetic component to hair-fidgeting, I can do you a nice virus for it.
MaxwellBuchanan, Apr 02 2015
  

       Only if fidgeting is involved.
8th of 7, Apr 04 2015
  

       Woman who hair fidget are attractive. I think hair fidgeting is a signal that a particular individual is interested in you or nervous about something. If someone already has a nervous complex isn't it somewhat cruel to deprive them by force of the one thing that comforts or keeps them from altogether snapping? This is tantamount to cutting off a thumb suckers thumb or robbing soft bunnies or blankeys from insecure children. These HFPs could seriously create monsters.
vfrackis, Apr 10 2015
  

       // Woman who hair fidget are attractive. //   

       No, they're not. They're just irritating self-obsessed vain airheads.   

       // isn't it somewhat cruel to deprive them by force of the one thing that comforts or keeps them from altogether snapping? //   

       On the contrary, it's an excellent source of inexpensive entertainment.   

       // cutting off a thumb suckers thumb //   

       A highly effective technique.   

       // robbing soft bunnies or blankeys from insecure children. //   

       Happiness is a neurotic, terrified juvenile.   

       // These HFPs could seriously create monsters. //   

       Yes, it's brilliant, isn't it ?
8th of 7, Apr 04 2016
  

       <waves> to [Bob]by...
po, Apr 05 2016
  
      
[annotate]
  


 

back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle