Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Lawn Drugs

The lawn that does not need mowing
  [vote for,

Deliberately put your lawn through the joys of steroid abuse, smoking, drinking, malnutrition all the things I was told when I was young that would stunt my growth, hence stunting the lawns growth and eliminating the need to mow.
steviej, Aug 12 2004


       In my youth, goats did the dirty work. They were fun to "pet" in between the area where their horns were being formed, and eventually would be proudly worn. The fight over what to name the females, 'cept Nanny, were fun too. Sorry, must boo this one.
blissmiss, Aug 12 2004

       or you could take the drugs yourself and then you would stop caring how long your lawn got
Mind_Boggle, Aug 13 2004

       this is what astroturf is for... bun for the semi-logical-yet-absurd line of thought anyway
luecke, Aug 13 2004

       nicotine used to be a pesticide back in the '50s. I doubt the farmers would want their crops sprayed with the stuff if it stunted their crops. They eventually quit using it because it would hang in the air, the pilots would breathe it, and then become euphoric and crash.
destructionism, Aug 13 2004

       I'd imagine if you inhaled it in the quantities and concentrations used as pesticide, it would have an effect a bit stronger than a few cigarettes.
Freefall, Aug 13 2004

       [bwv61]My friend's father encountered this problem. He didn't die, but he wasn't sure why it was so hard to land
destructionism, Aug 14 2004

       Exactly. Hamsters on speed are known to be horrific pilots. So bad, in fact, I've never heard of a hamster on speed land an aircraft and survive.
destructionism, Aug 14 2004

       Baaaahh, you old slave driver....
blissmiss, Aug 15 2004

       [zanzibar] It's a fact. I can't tell you exactly why nicotine was pulled from the market, but the pilots complained about it. Watching a cropduster work, you can see the spray/dust hang in the air. Aircraft come back with droplets all over the wings and streaks down the fuselage. I have no doubts that they inhaled the nicotine, nor do I have any doubts that the nicotine caused them to be light-headed and impaired their ability to fly.
destructionism, Aug 15 2004

       Nothing stunts a lawn like lack of water.
bungston, Aug 15 2004


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