Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Space Hoes: Coast to Coast

AKA Nasty NASA. Similar to Naked News.
  [vote for,

Naked News (link) is a great concept. It features beautiful models who deliver real news reports while stripping their clothes off one article (no pun intended) at a time. Men are drawn to it by the urges of one head, and absorb the news in the peripheral with the other.

Well there's a lot of interesting stuff happening in space. Repairs being made on the I.S.S. and various satellites, scientific studies and research being conducted, and new objects entering our solar system that are neat to look at.

But currently, nobody cares what's going on up there. I think the way to speed up Mankind's technological development and give us a boost towards our Manifest Destiny is to motivate him not with promises of pride and knowledge that posterity will enjoy his progress. History has shown that man is motivated by sex to do a great many things he otherwise would not, such as holding purses in line at women's clothing stores, walking women's sissy Chihuahuas, and laughing at mind-numbing episodes of Will and Grace.

So my idea is for an off-shoot of Naked News to be hosted from the International Space Station. SPACE HOES: COAST TO COAST! Rather than deliver news of events happening on this world, they cover everything that happens out of it, interviewing the astronauts as they work . And at 2 AM when all the kiddies on Earth are asleep, the astronauts get to burn off a little steam. And the whole time they're at it, the highly-disciplined porn-star news anchors continue to deliver their news reports without missing a beat.

This would have several benefits. One, as stated above, the hard-working astronauts get unparalleled stress relief. Two, it makes the astronauts look considerably less geeky and makes more men want to be one. Three, it would require expanding the size of the ISS to accommodate the extra "crew", which has its own benefits. Four, women on the ISS with nothing to do on their off time would inevitably start cleaning and decorating the place, which again has its own benefits. Five, subscription fees would help fund more space projects. Six, it would give Trojan condoms the sole rights to say their product is outta this world!

Come on, I'm talking about porn stars in space and zero-G strip-tease! Get on it! Vote YES for Space Hoes!

21 Quest, Sep 11 2010

Naked News http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naked_News
[21 Quest, Sep 11 2010]

NASA celebrates its women astronauts http://cakewrecks.b...nes-for-ladies.html
[jutta, Sep 12 2010]

Topless Darts http://www.ukgamesh.../ukgs/Topless_Darts
[21 Quest, Sep 16 2010]

Hos, hoes http://en.wiktionar...wiki/ho#Etymology_2
[rcarty, Sep 16 2010]


       I'd like the name "Nasty Nasa" better.

       We don't explore space any more, might as well get into the sex trade.
doctorremulac3, Sep 11 2010

       Could just rebrand NASA. Nasty Aeronaughty Space Administering.
21 Quest, Sep 11 2010

       Space Hoes! Yes! I expect the same sort of unbridled enthusiasm shown by would-be prospectors during the "Gold Rush." Buns up, baby! [+]
Grogster, Sep 12 2010

       [+] Where do we get in line to join NASA?
saedi, Sep 12 2010

       Naked News leaves nothing to the imagination. I'd rather tune in to Naked Radio.
ldischler, Sep 12 2010

       Dude, this isn't about imagination. It's not about closing your eyes and fantasizing about romantic encounters in far off places. It's about opening them and staring at boobies floating weightless on your TV or computer screen, knowing for a fact that they are really there, and being motivated to excel in the fields of aeronautical research and engineering by the hope that you might become cool enough to get a piece.
21 Quest, Sep 12 2010

       I'm sorry, did you just invent Barbarella?
theircompetitor, Sep 12 2010

       I'm seeing Jane Fonda right now.
ldischler, Sep 12 2010

       [marked-for-deletion] pun (on "Space Hose").
jutta, Sep 12 2010

       Yes it's a pun, but you gotta admit the idea has substance. It would be just as valid and humorous a post even if the other idea hadn't been posted. It would be an echo or pun if it relied on the reference for it's punchline. Therefor, I disagree with the MFD.
21 Quest, Sep 12 2010

       Hmmm. [jutta], would this be a pun if it had a different title? Other that its title (which clearly is a pun), the substance of this idea has nothing to do with a space hose. Inspiration for ideas come from innumerable sources, not the least of which are other ideas posted on the HB. I myself was inspired to create one (TENS Unit Suit) from one of [Ian Tindale]'s ideas. Granted, it wasn't a pun; but had I piggybacked some cute variation of his title and then presented my idea would it also be considered a pun? What, then, constitutes the boundary line between the pun and un-pun? My previously held definition of the word would have seen this idea as a space hose presented in a silly light, such as a miles-high space weenie dog or something in addition to a pun title.

       [GROG=World's Leading Authority on His Own Opinion]
Grogster, Sep 12 2010

       In this case the line of development for this idea is documented in the annotations to the idea it echoes. The exchange goes a little something like this:

       21: <accidentally types hose as hoes>
Bigsleep: You owe us an idea about space hoes.


       Based on the Pun [m-f-d] criteria that's pretty incriminating evidence.
rcarty, Sep 12 2010

       No, see that's where you're wrong about the progression of the idea, rcarty. It was never a typo on my part. The title Space Hose reminded me of an old show called Space Ghost Coast to Coast, and got me thinking of a twist on that title. The word Hose didn't influence the idea, just the title.
21 Quest, Sep 12 2010

       I rest my case.
rcarty, Sep 12 2010

       I'm intrigued to find that, of Naked News, Wikipedia reports that "Beginning in 2005, a nudity-free version of Naked News was available to non-subscribers."


       As to the idea, meh [ ]. An idea built to support a pun, though not one of the worst.
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 12 2010

       I wondered about that statement myself... perhaps it refers to the Japanese version, which it mentions later on. Japanese broadcasting laws prohibit full nudity, so they just strip to their underwear.
21 Quest, Sep 12 2010

       I hope your conecept includes also a homosexual and interracial part - because nobody is allowed to be discreminated because of his sexual orientation or race - not even in space !
gutemine, Sep 13 2010

       We fully support homosexuality in space, which is why *lesbians* are eagerly encouraged to apply, and given the mixed ethnicities of the crew of the ISS, interracial interaction is simply unavoidable. There's no rule saying it can't happen.
21 Quest, Sep 13 2010

       then my neutral moves to a +
gutemine, Sep 13 2010

       <Here's GROG, vigorously applauding [gutemine]'s move...>
Grogster, Sep 13 2010

       There actually used to be a late-night time-filler called "Topless Darts in Space" shown in the UK. It wasn't really in space though, just slow-mo (in case you wondered). And it was classy.
squeak, Sep 15 2010

       [squeak] Link? Youtube??
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 15 2010

       No way! I am *not* going looking for that. You'll just have to believe me.
squeak, Sep 15 2010

       I tried and just found either porn or a bunch of unintelligible alien footage.
daseva, Sep 15 2010

       Inform SETI at once!
squeak, Sep 16 2010

       Actually, hang one, surely "whores" is contracted to "hos", not "hoes"?
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 16 2010

       Not quite, Max. A single whore would be contracted to "ho". Multiple whores are "hoes". Like the word "go" is extended to "goes" and not "gos".
21 Quest, Sep 16 2010

       Hos is correct too. Apples and oranges regarding previous example.
rcarty, Sep 16 2010


       (Literally rolling on floor laughing)
21 Quest, Sep 16 2010

       //Multiple whores are "hoes".//

       Ah!! So, when John Wayne says "Get on ya hos and get oudda town..", he doesn't mean...
MaxwellBuchanan, Sep 16 2010


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