Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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It might be better to just get another gerbil.

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Speaking Shoes

Say 'Left' or 'Right' with each step
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Great little educational tool for the kiddies. A switch sealed in each heal and a little speaker on top. Each time the kid takes a step, it tells them which is right and which is left. That ought to drum it into them pretty quick. Also, you can include a special message for when the switches are pressed too quickly in succession; "Stop running, you little b*****d!"
manic, Feb 14 2001

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       THAT would be REALLY annoying.
beauxeault, Feb 16 2001
  

       It could put the tongue to new use.
mrthingy, Feb 16 2001
  

       Quite confusing for a little tyke who might put on shoes backwards.
Howsabout a lace tension sensor? "Tie your laces, or you'll trip over them!" I've seen 14-year-olds who need this feature.
Cedar Park, Mar 11 2003
  

       i trip the guys at school by their shoelaces sometimes.. I like this idea...i'd want a pair to annoy my classmates and disrupt tests
igirl, Mar 11 2003
  

       The warning voice would pre-condition them for the wonderful world of talking cars <your lace is untied, your lace is untied, your lace is untied, your lace is untied>
Canuck, Mar 12 2003
  

       <you stepped in dog shit, you stepped in dog shit>
igirl, Mar 17 2003
  
      
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