Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Ice Fallies

Icy Platform and Springboard Diving
  (+3, -8)(+3, -8)
(+3, -8)
  [vote for,

Skater skates off Icy 3 or 10m raised surface which is populated by Polar Bears to ice below which is an 18 x 18 metre sheet floating in a 20 x 20 metre pool. Circling the perimeter, there are very hungry Arctic wolves which can bring down and kill an adult Skater with a single crushing bite to the neck.

The possibility/ probability/ plausibility of the skater falling into water are fairly high - 50/50, as the ice is not the thickest in the world. The water is populated by vicious Elephant Seals, as Tiger Seals have long been extinct - if they ever existed.

Point system:

Difficulty of dive, i.e. twists, spins, etc. as well as quality of landing.

If the skater falls into water, whether by impacting through ice, or skating off edge as ice bobbles around in water, the recovery to get back onto icy surface is rated much as it would be were there such a thing as solo synchronized swimming.

Regardless of immersion technicalities, which a_r_e rated as well - Upon recovery, the skater must do just that - skate - doing jumps, spins and all those artistic things - over and around Emperor Penguins a_n_d the hole in ice from impact, or from sheet to sheet if Ice sheet was split into 2 or more pieces - all the while trying to avoid ending up (back) in the icy drink.

Throughout the 3 minute program(me) music plays, and synchronicity with music no matter what happens is of utmost importance.

Should there be a thunderous ovation, the skater - no matter how far hypothermia has set in - must remain graceful - as this also figures into score.
thumbwax, Feb 23 2002

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       brilliant. How early do you think they need to start training for this? 5 years old - is that too early? Do the men compete against the women? or are they separate competitions?
po, Feb 24 2002

       No kiddies. This is for Males, Females, Mixed Pairs of age.
Judging by the amount of negative votes accrued thus far, I must declare that this is an example of "Pearls before Swine"
thumbwax, Feb 25 2002

       I request polar bears on the platform.
prometheus, Feb 25 2002

       Thy will... be done
thumbwax, Feb 26 2002

       I like penguins - is this an impossible request? do the two mix?
po, Feb 26 2002

       See 6th paragraph - went ahead and tossed in a few wolves for good measure too.
thumbwax, Feb 26 2002

       Ooh, ooh, what about tiger seals, can we have some of them too please? Then the water would be equally dangerous
goff, Feb 26 2002

       Sorry goff - all out of Tiger Seals - got Elephant Seals chomping at the bit though.
thumbwax, Feb 26 2002

       changed my mind you keep my little penguins out of there, thank you.
po, Feb 26 2002

       Not to worry po, The Penguins are really other competitors in disguises.
thumbwax, Feb 26 2002


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