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"Hurry Up And Change" Crosswalk Button

In a hurry? The quicker you pump it, the faster the light changes.
  [vote for,

Wouldn't need any instructions for use. We're all born with the innate feeling that pushing this button more will give us better results, so match the mechanism to the perception.
doctorremulac3, Jul 23 2012


       I thought they all worked like this?
pocmloc, Jul 23 2012

       Just give the control unit a prod with your Sonic Screwdriver ...
8th of 7, Jul 23 2012

       In the same spirit as the "close doors" button in elevators, and likely doomed to the same fate.
swimswim, Jul 23 2012

       Actually, about 30% of new elevators (specifically, those for which the controller is supplied by Schindler Lifts - I kid you not) do exactly this. They respond to rapid multiple pressing of the floor- selection buttons (not the close-door button, strangely) by closing the doors sooner. This was done to prolong the life of the buttons, because people pummel them regardless, and closing the doors makes them stop it.   

       They (both Schindler's lifts and most others installed in Europe and the US) will also respond to a "tap-tap, tap- tap-tap, tap- tap-tap" pattern by closing the doors immediately (barring obstructions) and going directly to the selected floor without stopping; this is for emergency teams (medics, police, whatever) who do not have (or have time to find and use) the emergency key. If you have ever impatiently pounded the button and had your wish granted, it's because you fortuitously hit this pattern.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 23 2012

       This is either a) true or b) Max having a laugh in knowing at least some people are going to now start wildly hammering elevator floor buttons thinking it will get the doors to close faster. The Schindler Lifts part would enhance the gag when the hapless dupe explained to everybody in the elevator that if it's a "Shindler Lifts" elevator the doors should close faster.   

       Nervous elevator passenger: "You mean like Shindler's List the movie?"   

       Hapless dupe: (taptaptaptap) "No, it's an elevator company, Shindler Lifts. For real, I read it on the internet. They make elevator buttons that let you decide when the door closes by how many times you bang on it. What floor do you want?"   

       Nervous elevator passenger: "Uhh, I'm getting off here thanks."
doctorremulac3, Jul 23 2012

       The Schindler's lifts part is true. As for the rest of [Max's] story....?
AusCan531, Jul 23 2012

       //Schindler's lifts// I wonder if their lift music is provided by John Williams?
mitxela, Jul 23 2012

       //Hapless dupe: (taptaptaptap) //   

       Well, you see, you've got it wrong there. It's tap- tap, tap-tap-tap, tap-tap-tap (on any floor-select button). 2-3-3.   

       Allegedly it's because (a) emergency codes differ from country to country so there was no point using "911" or "999" (which would be too many taps, anyway) and/or:   

       (b) The designer who made the specs had three children called Berta, Carl and Clara (the initial letters of which are 2, 3 and 3 if you count A=1, B=2 etc).   

       Obviously, if the designer had been American, it would have been "shave and and a haircut". (The same code is used in many American-made elevators, though. In fact, in one of those rare outbreaks of common sense, all lift manufacturers who implement this feature use the same code.)
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 23 2012

       This works fine for areas where no cars ever appear or where high bodycounts are standard.
Phrontistery, Jul 24 2012

       I don't see why, the light would turn red for the cars before the "Walk" sign illuminated. Pushing the button faster would just hasten the process.
doctorremulac3, Jul 24 2012

       As a kid, I used to think traffic lights had an inbuilt "Jeff" backdoor, in that if emergency services wanted to stop traffic immediately, they just had to do SOS in Morse Code on the button. It worked for me for about a week (I assume coincidentally) so I was convinced and I've tried it ever since, albeit with mixed results.
theleopard, Jul 24 2012

       That and Max's post gives me an idea for an offshoot of this. Spread a rumor that you can change the speed of the light changing by some wierd combination of button pushes.   

       SOS might be good just as a final tribute to Morse code.
doctorremulac3, Jul 24 2012

       Just hook a strobe function to a laser pointer and aim it at the sensor. This, (the strobe not the laser), is how ambulances and fire-trucks make the signals change in their direction. Flashing your high-beams at a fast enough rate while driving will also work.   

       //SOS in Morse Code // I have read (a while ago) that there is something like this for pedestrian crosswalks, but I don't think it was "SOS".   

       OK, a quick Google reveals lots of articles, but they have the flavour of urban myth about them. So, this probably isn't baked for crosswalks, only for lifts (elevators, if you must).
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 24 2012

       Heartbeats-adjusted crosswalk?
Inyuki, Jul 24 2012

tatterdemalion, Jul 24 2012

       The system that works to get you across the street faster (almost every time*) is as follows:   

       A) Press the crosswalk button 3 times in rapid succession,   

       B) Within 15 seconds, dart across the road and press that button twice.   

       C) Look up. You are now across the road much faster than if you had pressed the first button and crossed the road in the normal manner.*   

       *except for those times when you don't make it at all.
AusCan531, Jul 24 2012

       My estimates suggest that, since my earlier annotation, seven halfbakers will have tried the 2-3- 3 lift-button press and, of these, 2 and 1/3rd will have been whisked directly to their chosen floor.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 24 2012

       That paints a grisly picture. So you should wait till your completely inside before pushing the buttons I guess.
doctorremulac3, Jul 24 2012

       //whisked// from the Norse "ouissen" or "vissen", meaning to [make something] hurry, rather than //whisked// from the Gaelic "hisk", meaning to mix or beat.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jul 24 2012


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