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conductor aid

because some of us just don't have a sense of rhythm
  (+3, -1)
(+3, -1)
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I'm a member of a cool rock gospel choir, and I really want to conduct a song, but you can guarantee that if I did, I'd have the whole song gradually speed up until I just get dirty looks from all the sopranos. So I need some kind of device to help me keep time - I think a little pad strapped to the back of my hand which just flicked my hand to a regular beat, that I could speed up or slow down for each song. And it'd have to be skin coloured, obviously - hey I don't want everyone to know about my rhythm deficiency!
mac cartel, Dec 05 2000

Wittner MT50W Compact Quartz Metronome http://www.brookmay...p.asp?itemnum=MT50W
"...with light off light only..." [phoenix]

Control = Speed http://www.skiphealy.com/09.htm
Tips on how to acquire tempo [phoenix, Apr 14 2002, last modified Oct 21 2004]

Control = Speed http://www.skiphealy.com/09.htm
Tips on how to acquire tempo [phoenix, Apr 14 2002, last modified Oct 04 2004]

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       Is there some reason the word 'metronome' doesn't appear here?
egnor, Dec 07 2000

       Oddly enough, when you're conducting a choir, you can't hear the ticking of a metronome.
mac cartel, Dec 07 2000

       One of the good things about having a human conductor is the ability of the conductor to adjust for the mood of a particualar phrase or if (<insert deity here> forbid) somebody should mess up. There would have to be tradeoffs, I guess.
badoingdoing, Dec 08 2000

       Just have a heart pacemaker installed connected via a negative feedback circuit to a microphone. As the music speeds up, your heart slows down and your conducting movements become sluggish.
hippo, Dec 08 2000

       Most electronic metronomes have a light that flashes with the beat. If you need to change the tempo, listen to a performance you like on headphones and conduct to THAT. Instant Von Karajan! (If someone messes up, I think a good conductor ignores it so as not to confuse the rest of the ensemble.)
rmutt, Dec 09 2000

       Would it be practical to have an electronic gadget such as a Palm Pilot (I think that's the right name)on hand which might be adapted for providing a sense of rhythm?
JoeBader1, Sep 26 2001

       what about a wrist-watch style device which you can set like a metronome, and it gives you small shocks or vibrations or something on the beats?
professorfrink, Apr 13 2002

       Metronomes are not normally used during performance or even practice but before (at least this is as I was taught).  The idea is that you listen to the metronome for a few seconds to get accustomed to the given tempo and then, during performance, you count the meter in your head. One and uh two and uh three and uh . . . (triplet).  You might be surprised how effective and accurate this is, given a little practice.
bristolz, Apr 13 2002

       mac cartel, wherever you may be - Seems kind of hard to screw that *church choir conductor's cross pattern* up.
thumbwax, Nov 12 2002

       I think that the watch idea is a bit off. I mean, do you really want to get schocked 120 times in a minute? not really.
Seafris, Mar 12 2003


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