Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Evil Joke Vending Machine

Sit back and watch the fun begin!
 
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A vending machine modified so that the opening in the tray you reach into to grab the drink is too small for the drink to fit through. You see the drink dispense into the tray, but you cannot get it out! Muwahahaha!!!!

Either that or have an electromagnet inside the tray with a normal-sized opening preventing you from pulling the can out so it's less obvious.

After about 10 seconds, a bottom panel opens and the drink falls down inside the machine where it is re-loaded, and the money is returned. Unless you somehow manage to get the drink anyway, in which case you don't get a dime back.

21 Quest, Dec 08 2006

The Zap Gun http://www.octobot....The%20Zap%20Gun.rtf
Philip K Dick - master of SF [8th of 7, Jun 18 2009]

[link]






       I have enough problems with malfunctioning wending machines as it is. This wouldn't help.
Veho, Dec 08 2006
  

       Aw man, I was expecting something like "Hmm, how can I get back at Henderson in Accounting? Let's see: whoopee cushion, fake peanut brittle can, Ah! Dribble cup! A-5, a dollar fifty."
phundug, Dec 08 2006
  

       Actaully, that's not a bad idea, phundug. Have Hostess cupcakes laced with laxatives, dribble cups, and other joke items in a vending machine... post it, man! I'll bun that!
21 Quest, Dec 08 2006
  

       Oh. I thought it was like the ELAHD where you'd have to tell an evil joke to get the machine to work. You know, baby in a blender or something like that. Phundug's approach is delightful! More evilness might bring more buns, a small hole is only so evil.
daseva, Jun 18 2009
  

       I had a thought like daseva's, except that I expected the machine to print out a little ticket with the most horribly tasteless of jokes.
  

       I think it would be difficult to turn a profit off a machine that not only didn't yield a beverage, but that mocked the thirsty customer for it. In fact, I think the machine might quickly end up in a state of disrepair as a consequence of the ensuing shaking and kicking it would receive.
swimswim, Jun 18 2009
  

       A vending machine is only as good or as bad as the person who uses it.
Laughs Last, Jun 18 2009
  

       Nothing is either good or bad, but vending makes it so.
daseva, Jun 18 2009
  

       I missed this. What a great invention. I love it. Especially if it had the additions mentioned above. +++++
blissmiss, Jun 18 2009
  

       This has the potential to be developed into a sort of Zap Gun ... oooohhh NICE ..... we like muchly.
8th of 7, Jun 18 2009
  
      
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