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A Method of Continuous Wool Production

A smarter way to make clothing
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I read about a great idea of using algae to grow continuous filaments into thread, the basis of clothing.

My idea is to tie-down a wool bearing animal so it can't move, then gather its hair into a continuous weave machine so that with time, the wool hair will grow into thread, lines, rope etc.

It’s not too farfetched. Silk worms surround themselves with a thin silk filament, and using live wool bearing animals would be very similar except the cocoons step worms use, could be eliminated.

With a large number of these animals suitable constrained, nutrified and hydrated by automatic feeding machines, their wastes removed, treated and cycled into animal feed with additives, the textile industry could eliminate petroleum based synthetic materials thereby making civilized counties less dependent upon middle-east oil barons, decrease carbon foot-print and feed the poor after the animal becomes too old to grow wool. The remaining bones could be pulverized into calcium pills and the hoofs made into glue.

el dueno

el dueno, Jun 08 2008

(???) ...and then look what happens! http://cache.viewim...953474FC6B9CADF7309
[xandram, Jun 09 2008]

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       <Watches with interest from a distance as large angry mob of Animal Rights protestors, armed with pitchforks, scythes and flaming torches, march purposefully towards [el dueno]'s home>
8th of 7, Jun 08 2008

       I think this probably falls under the cruelty clause for MFDs.
ldischler, Jun 08 2008

       Hmmm, maybe not quite. If the animals were tranquilised, it would be a sort of wooly "matrix".   

       Fuzzy logic ?
8th of 7, Jun 08 2008

       ... the flipside of vat-grown meat, I think.
FlyingToaster, Jun 08 2008

       The follicles should respond to stress. There's a good chance that you'd get faster wool growth if you glued the sheep to the ceiling in a very tall building, and let it descend under its own weight as its wool grew.   

       You could also spin the descending sheep gently, which it might rather enjoy.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 08 2008

       Rather than tie them down, a perforated vest would be belted on the sheep that would allow the wool to grow through to holes and be braided as it grew by naaanno bots...where it could be secretly interlaced with miroscopic flax fibers.

I'm kidding already...don't kvetch.

       Hair growth is slow, weaving machines are fast. So all this solves is the straightening of the fibers since they still have to be cut to go thru the machine. So this seems cruel and inefficient. I'm assuming this is a joke, but it still needs some help.
MisterQED, Jun 09 2008

       If all you need is skin follicles, why grow the whole animal? Shirley what you need is a bag of cultured skin full of circulating nutrient solution...
GutPunchLullabies, Jun 09 2008

       //a bag of cultured skin full of circulating nutrient solution..// We had one of those. He was replaced by Gordon Brown just a while ago.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 09 2008

       // very similar except the cocoons step//   

       OH MY GOD. I just had a terrible thought. What if sheep have actually trying to pupate all this time, and we're just shearing off their coccoons every time they try?   

       Perhaps, if left to their own devices, they would enter a quiescent phase and then emerge as beautiful winged adults, leaving the woolly coccoon behind?
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 09 2008

       That would explain a great deal .....
8th of 7, Jun 09 2008

       Sheep, and animals in general, have the benefit of having mobility and intelligence. This allows them to auto-feed and to do some basic things to maintain their health and safety. Excluding these benefits animals are a classic case of inefficient production and high emissions.
WcW, Jun 09 2008

       All cruelty aside, it's a great idea, but the cruelty issue won't let it fly in all but the shittiest countries.
kevinthenerd, Jun 10 2008

       // Sheep....have the benefit of .... intelligence //   

       No, they do not. It is clear that you have had very limited dealings with the breed. There are things that grow on damp bread that are brighter than most sheep. Sheep are irredeeemably, unutterably THICK.   

       // the cruelty issue won't let it fly in all but the shittiest countries //   

       Sounds like the French will go for it in a big way, then.
8th of 7, Jun 10 2008

       I think the US would go for it even more. Several elements of our common practice in agriculture and law enforcement are considered "too cruel/disgusting" by other nations.
Spacecoyote, Jun 10 2008

       // common practice in agriculture and law enforcement //   

       Hmmmm...... the implication being that in the USA, the same approach is used to both policing and farming........
8th of 7, Jun 10 2008

       <homerjsimpson> Mmm...Incapacitating</hjs>
Spacecoyote, Jun 11 2008

       This makes no sense, solves no existing problem, and exhibits its share of the littledickedness that seems to result in animal cruelty.
nomocrow, Jun 11 2008

       You people are assuming its uses fast weaving machines. They need move no faster thanthe wool grows. And cruelty? Just lobotomize them at birth, or jolt the happy center in their brains.
Voice, Jun 11 2008

       Naaaanobots, ha!
elhigh, Jun 12 2008

       Hmmm.... nanobots for weaving...
RayfordSteele, Aug 05 2008


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