Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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A Monument To European Financial Unity

"Broken Dreams"
  (+15, -1)(+15, -1)
(+15, -1)
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This monumental cast-metal sculpture consists of two gigantic figures flanking a central motif.

On one side, Napoleon Bonaparte; on the other, Adolf Hitler. They are portrayed in attitudes of grief, sorrow and despair.

Between them is a huge map of Europe, depicted as on a broken mirror, shattered into many parts. Off to one side is Britain, picked out in emeralds and surrounded by a sea of silver; a smug golden sun throws its benificent rays upon the Sceptered Isle.

The sculpture is made from the metal recovered by melting down millions of Euro coins.

On the base of the monument in the Attic alphabet is the inscription, "I fear the Greeks, especially when they want loans".

At random intervals, huge concealed loudspeakers play the unmistakeable sounds of the Russians, Americans and Chinese laughing their socks off.

The sculpture would ideally be displayed outside the former premises of the European Central Bank, now an empty and abandoned shell through which the cold winds of economic reality blow unimpeded.

8th of 7, Jun 15 2012

[link]






       Are you sure the foundation is solid?
Alterother, Jun 15 2012
  

       I met a baker from an antique land
Who said: "A vast and witless bank of melted euros
Stands on the continent. Near it in the mire,
Half sunk, a shattered Merkel lies, whose frown
And wrinkled lip and sneer of cold command
Tell that her advisors well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The treaty that mocked them and the loan that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear:
`My name is federal Europe, King of Kings:
Look on my works, ye mighty, and despair!'
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal joke, discordent and mad,
The lone and level drachmas stretch far away".
[+]
Fishrat, Jun 15 2012
  

       I dunno. It seems to me that a "monument" should really be a metaphor for something or have some kind of obvious symbolism, and it's just not clear what the connection is here from the description.
ytk, Jun 16 2012
  

       I give it 24 hours to be 'relocated' to the nearest scrap metal dealer.
Phrontistery, Jun 16 2012
  

       You have to give the Greeks some credit, mainly because they have no money.
S-note, Jun 16 2012
  

       // should really be a metaphor for something or have some kind of obvious symbolism, and it's just not clear what the connection is here from the description //   

       Ha ha, irony, ha ha … please, tell us that's irony, right ? You get the whole Hitler- Napoleon-European-unity thing, ddon't you?
8th of 7, Jun 16 2012
  

       Well, /that/ part I get, obviously. Hitler is a reference to Jesse Owens' upset at the 1936 Olympics, and Napoleon is there to implore the viewer to vote for Pedro.
ytk, Jun 16 2012
  

       You had us worried for a minute, there.
8th of 7, Jun 16 2012
  

       /please, tell us that's irony, right/ More copper-nickelly.
bungston, Jun 16 2012
  

       //You have to give the Greeks some credit//   

       Their economy may be in ruins, but they've still got a sense of hummus.
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 16 2012
  

       //Do I even need to ask what you've done with [xenzag] ? // I hear my name. The idea is a bit literal for me, but a worthy sentiment.
xenzag, Jun 16 2012
  

       They don't need Ozymandias, Fishrat, they need Ozzy. Have him perform for Parliament, tear the head off some pigeons, and things will improve pronto.
theircompetitor, Jun 16 2012
  

       // What goes on between a (now) cat-hating Borg and a cat-loving hippie behind closed doors is strictly their business, of which I want no part. //   

       You should loosen up, man. Try something new, maybe you'll have a little fun!
Alterother, Jun 16 2012
  

       I just saw the headline "Wildfires break out near Athens", and my first thought was "Aha! World's most ambitious insurance fraud!"
pertinax, Jun 17 2012
  

       That figures. After all, the destruction of the Parthenon was probably an insurance swindle- they'd already sold off the frieze…
8th of 7, Jun 17 2012
  

       // they'd already sold off the frieze…// I thought it had been taken into protective custody.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jun 17 2012
  

       Yeah, right … money changed hands is all we're saying, even if the paperwork was a bit … improvised…
8th of 7, Jun 17 2012
  

       //destruction of the Parthenon was probably an insurance swindle//   

       <voice of man who saw a program about the Elgin Marbles on telly the other night> At some point, in some war, the Greeks used the Parthenon as an ammunition store. It didn't go well, not least because of the lack of walls. <\MvomwsapatEMotton>
MaxwellBuchanan, Jun 17 2012
  

       The Greeks just might pull it off... which would make a nice change from having them repeatedly hump it up the arse.
UnaBubba, Jun 18 2012
  

       //At some point, in some war, the Greeks used the Parthenon as an ammunition store//
Psst "Turks" - you need to watch more telly.
AbsintheWithoutLeave, Jun 18 2012
  

       Leave bothering the greeks, they still holds the copyright of Plato, Archimedes and Aristotle's ideas
piluso, Nov 18 2012
  

       Hmmm... ironic: We were thinking of a similar monument here in the States --- it would be a giant Twinkie impaled on the Sword of Damocles. [+]
Grogster, Nov 18 2012
  

       //the unmistakeable sounds of the Russians, Americans and Chinese laughing their socks off.//   

       Having recently adopted the Greek model of buying paradise on Earth with high interest credit, us Americans aren't doing a lot of laughing right now. At least not the ones who are expected to pay for it.
doctorremulac3, Nov 18 2012
  

       // similar monument … Sword of Damocles. //   

       For total allegorical irony, the sword is labelled "Defecit", and a Democrat and a Republican take turns hauling the rope ever higher while singing "Things Can Only Get Better" …
8th of 7, Nov 18 2012
  

       ^^ Oh, my achin' Twinkie...
Grogster, Nov 18 2012
  

       <timely churn>
8th of 7, Jun 26 2016
  

       This is the thing with [8/7]. You never knew whether he was being serious, or just sarcastic.
UnaBubba, Mar 03 2021
  

       //You never knew whether he was being serious, or just sarcastic.//   

       Both, usually, I think that's the basic mix for good satire.
bs0u0155, Mar 03 2021
  
      
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