Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
h a l f b a k e r y
Clearly this is a metaphor for something.

idea: add, search, annotate, link, view, overview, recent, by name, random

meta: news, help, about, links, report a problem

account: browse anonymously, or get an account and write.

user:
pass:
register,


             

Please log in.
Before you can vote, you need to register. Please log in or create an account.

Bear-Crow

Train bears... for their own good
  (+4)
(+4)
  [vote for,
against]

Bears sometimes kill and eat people. This is bad for the people, because they're no longer alive, and bad for the bears, because they're usually hunted down and shot. It's also bad for the area, because it hurts tourism. So, let's solve this.

Bears are reasonably smart, at least as smart as rats. So, using conditioning (behavioral, not in-shower fur care) we can prevent them from going anywhere near humans. Now, bear conditioning is sort of baked <link>, but it's crude, essentially shouting and pelting them with rubber bullets. So let's set up camp. Literally, a tent, a truck with human sound track and campfire smell and food smell. Only there's electric fence type shockers on all the objects, and when touched, the fake humans give off a nasty blast of compressed air, or something.

You could dot these about the place, especially the bigger national parks, and eventually, the bears will learn that things that sound and look like humans may smell like food, but they hurt, and there's no food. Back to the river for salmon it is.

bs0u0155, Dec 14 2013

Bear Conditioning http://www.bearsmar...nagement/non-lethal
[bs0u0155, Dec 14 2013]

[link]






       Nice try, but this would probably backfire and end up teaching bears how to be electricians. Anyway, I like it.
the porpoise, Dec 14 2013
  

       // teaching bears how to be electricians //   

       "They're taking our jarbs !"   

       Just make sure they don't leave any bear wires.
8th of 7, Dec 14 2013
  

       I had a dog once who would chew up expensive leather horse bridles. Only the leather ones, and only the best ones.   

       I tried putting hot pepper sauce on the damn things. All that happened was he developed a taste for cajun cooking.
normzone, Dec 14 2013
  

       //shouldn't this be called a scare-bear?/   

       Thought of that, but it's already the title of another idea. There's already "Bear-crow" and "Bear- Conditioning". that's not a bad pun-density.
bs0u0155, Dec 14 2013
  

       Bears essentially have nothing to do but sit around all day and figure out how stuff works. If you put out electric shock deterrent devices and just leave them there, I give it two seasons before people start getting mugged by bears armed with home-made tasers.
Alterother, Dec 14 2013
  
      
[annotate]
  


 

back: main index

business  computer  culture  fashion  food  halfbakery  home  other  product  public  science  sport  vehicle