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Car Lift Helicopter

Stuck in a jam? Have your car lifted by a giant electromagnet Helicopter!
  (+3)
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Have you ever been stuck in traffic and REALLY need to get to your destination? Do you have 10,000$ to burn?

Boy do I have the imaginary service for you! If you register for Air-Lift, our mechanics will customize your car to allow the magnet to properly lift your car, distribute the force so you don't rip the top off your new car instead of the whole car.

If you activate an emergency beacon your car will transmit it's GPS for a helicopter to pick you up with it's electromagnet and drop you off at your destination.

Buckle up and roll up the windows, you don't want to fall out of a moving vehicle hanging from an aerial vehicle!

Duck Lagrange, May 11 2015

Careful ! You don't want to damage the... Add-on_20pseudo_20SUV_20kit
[normzone, May 11 2015]

[link]






       [+] Not just for avoiding traffic jams – also a way to make a big impression arriving at you HS reunion, golf outing, etc.
CraigD, May 11 2015
  

       May I recommend MaxCo's alternative service? For a charge only two orders of magnitude greater than DuckCo's car-lift service, MaxCo's fleet of magnet- toting helicopters will clear obstructing vehicles from your path, allowing you to arrive serenely at your destination in the way nature intended.
MaxwellBuchanan, May 11 2015
  

       Or you could get the discounted version (with no new technology required): An assistant is lowered down a cable from the helicopter and helps you into the harness. He may optionally secure some luggage as well before signalling to take you away. The assistant stays behind to drive your car to your destination where you can pick it up after your meeting/wedding/etc.
scad mientist, May 11 2015
  

       Agreed CraigD, we will include a spot/strobe light package for dropping in on a place dangling your baller luxury car from a helicopter. I also really like the assistant idea, that would be way more realistic. Useful for drunk drivers too!   

       As far as DuckCo vs MaxCo I believe Dilbert may have had your idea beat (in speed at least) with the de-trafficinator: a missile fired in front of your blocked traffic jam that explodes all cars in front of you.   

       I have a similar insane de-trafficinator idea I will post today.
Duck Lagrange, May 14 2015
  

       Could you have some form of virtual whip-round between all the people caught in the jam to move the blockage: the elderly person in the Peugeot who wandered onto the motorway then ran out of fuel?
bs0u0155, May 14 2015
  
      
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