Half a croissant, on a plate, with a sign in front of it saying '50c'
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Cars With Their Bums In The Air

disable cars and humiliate their selfish owners
  (+5, -8)
(+5, -8)
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People who steal designated "disabled" car parking places often do so with total impunity. Others may receive a fine, or have their car clamped, but none of these punishments deliver the necessary level of retribution suitable for this nasty activity. Cars With Their Bums In The Air is designed to both humiliate and punish in an appropriate manner.

Cars which have been determined to have illegally parked in disabled spaces are subjected to having their rear ends jacked high in the air, by means of a simple piece of portable hydraulic apparatus that is inserted under the back end of the car.

A hydraulic hose, powered from the "parent" enforcement vehicle quickly delivers the required energy to push two adjustable rams upwards, elevating the back end of the offending vehicle into a ridiculous "bum in the air" posture. Once in place, the compressor hose is removed, and the car is left locked securely in position, with its bum in the air.

The owner will require the return of the enforcement vehicle; then pay a suitable fine, along with a lowering service fee, in order to have it restored to its level position.

xenzag, Nov 13 2014

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       You are the exact person for whom this idea is designed, given the last part of your statement. Folk who are disabled greatly depend on the extra space afforded by disabled parking spots to get their bulky wheel-chairs in and out etc. Personally I would walk miles before taking one of these spaces.
xenzag, Nov 13 2014
  

       Extend the enforcement to cover ANY specially designated parking space - be it disabled, electric vehicle, or car-sharing - and you'll get my bun!
Canuck, Nov 13 2014
  

       But please, put the electric vehicle charging spots at a less convenient location. If someone is running in for a 5 minutes errand they won't be charging anyway, and by putting the spot further away, it is less likely that someone will use the spot when they don't actually need a charge, regardless of the possible punishment. And while you're at it, you could put a charger by at least one of the handicapped spots as well in case a handicapped person is driving an electric car.
scad mientist, Nov 13 2014
  

       I'm quite depressed that so many contributors here consider it a bad idea to punish those who steal the parking spaces of the less able who need them most. I am inclined to consider making this my last posting here as I no longer wish to share a common space with such selfish company.
xenzag, Nov 13 2014
  

       //put a charger by at least one of the handicapped spots as well in case a handicapped person is driving an electric car.// Or if they need to charge their power wheel chair!
DIYMatt, Nov 13 2014
  

       // and now me//   

       Nah, stick around. For what it's worth, you had my bun.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 13 2014
  

       The biggest problem is that while the car is jacked up, the handicap spot is still unusable. What if the car is tipped all the way vertical, standing on its bumper, allowing space for someone else to use the spot. If you call the enforcement vehicle back, but there is someone now parked there, you must wait until the handicapped person leaves before retrieving the car. The enforcer is of course paid at an hourly rate while waiting and has a couple handicapped friends on speed dial to call whenever he jacks a car up.
scad mientist, Nov 13 2014
  

       Here's the problem, though. Invariably, there will be some false positive—the owner forgets to put up the handicap placard, handicap placard falls off the mirror, or is expired without the owner realizing, etc. In those cases, you'll be disabling the vehicle of a legitimately disabled person who may have no other means of transportation, and that is not only a rather severe punishment for a simple mistake with no malicious intent, but could also present a safety and welfare issue for someone who is incapable of utilizing any other means of transportation.   

       Currently, if you are legitimately entitled to park in a disabled spot but receive a ticket anyway, you can have the ticket dismissed, with perhaps at most an administrative fee. If the goal is to make things *easier* for the disabled, this idea fails in its intent.
ytk, Nov 13 2014
  

       I agree with xenzag.   

       If the only way to get your next can of spray-on cheese is by potentially inconveniencing a disabled person, then maybe it's not ethical?   

       Also, from observation, generally the non-disabled driver's car in the disabled parking slot is a very expensive car...
not_morrison_rm, Nov 13 2014
  

       So, [xenzag], if you're leaving, can I have your parking spot?
Grogster, Nov 14 2014
  

       //Separate parking spaces for manual wheel chairs and electric wheelchairs//   

       That would necessitate more disabled spaces in total. For example, if the average number of manual and electric wheelchair users is 16 of each, then you have to allow about 16 + sqrt(16) = 16+4=20 spaces for each, to allow for reasonable fluctuations, or 40 spaces in total. If you just say that there are an average of 32 wheelchair users in total, then you have to allow 32+sqrt(32) = 32+6 = 38 spaces.
MaxwellBuchanan, Nov 14 2014
  

       //punish those who do X, more severely than they are already punished for doing X   

       It looks more like "actually punish X" or "punish X in a different way".
not_morrison_rm, Nov 14 2014
  

       Leaving a vehicle suspended by Hydraulic pressure is very dangerous. More simple would be to lift up the drive wheels with a trolley jack, and then tow it to a far corner so that the driver has to look for his vehicle, after initially thinking that it was stolen.
Ling, Nov 15 2014
  

       I agree with 21 if anyone did this to my car I'd do what I'm going to do.
rcarty, Nov 15 2014
  

       Walk home?
not_morrison_rm, Nov 15 2014
  

       Yes I don't drive unless its free.
rcarty, Nov 15 2014
  

       // Not if you're running late for an appointment or have to do that walking in a foot of snow, or if you have a child in tow. I seriously doubt you or anyone are that altruistic.//   

       It is not a matter of altruism. It is a matter of what is right and what is wrong. Morally, ethically, legally, and constitutionally wrong.   

       You're running late for an appointment? Whose fault is that, the disabled person who happens to arrive in the crowded parking lot 3 minutes behind you? Be an adult and take responsibility for your actions!   

       There's a foot of snow? Kudos for getting there in those conditions, but just because you made it doesn't mean you deserve to park in the disabled spot. How do you know there isn't a disabled person, just as determined as you, about to pull into the parking lot?   

       Child in tow? Seriously, you regard a child as an inconvenience? What terrible lessons to teach a child. First "you are a burden to me", then "disregard the needs of others". Great parenting!   

       I would like to believe you wrote your annotation without really thinking about it so I am perfectly willing to delete this one if you delete yours.
Canuck, Nov 17 2014
  
      
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